well, i honestly still seek the joy of the Lord, at least in a sense, but i am pretty content. No one reading this would like my life, surely, but i trust God, and all of my needs are somehow met. People are putting money in my pockets while I'm asleep--because i would refuse it when awake--offering me cars and houses that i don't want, etc., and it is hard to gauge if it is pity or attempting to justify their MO by sucking me back in, and of course one cannot just ask such things. I get phone calls like "hey, can you come..." and I'm on one now, in fact, so I'm not being avoided.
But it is hard being at odds with everyone else's cultural norms, for sure. I have learned to acquiesce, and eat the poisoned food offered in silence, etc, suffer through the movie or whatever, and i am plateaued and still struggling in areas, but i would not go back.
You would surely describe me as a vagabond, lest i give any false impressions here; bum does not really fit, as i will put a new roof on for you, etc, but people find me frustrating, although their answers as to why strike me as codependent, "you just aren't like us" kind of stuff. Who wants to be that guy all the time, lol.
Linear Mode
