Do Ministers Really Do This?

[AreYouReady?]

Or is this just a regional thing?

I probably won't get any answers or if I do, it will be a denial. But....

I was told by a local church's board member that when someone leaves one UPC church for another, the Pastor is called from the former Pastor to tell his version of why that person left. Then it is passed on to the board members.

Board members can't keep anything quiet. They tell their wives and the wives tell other church members.

Then when the "new" person starts the new church hoping for a new start, he/she gets the cold shoulder from the people and the new pastor never brings the subject up to discuss it with the new member.

Please tell me it ain't so....!

[Titus2woman]

It happens all the time here. We were very in with the in crowd at our last church... friends with the associate pastor and other ministers. We heard all the dish on new people.

One place it does not happen is between our old church and our new church. The pastors hate each other. The pastor of our old church having preached what a weak backslider church our present church is over the pulpit... Of course someone couldn't wait to give our pastor the tape. Now it's the Hatfields and the Mc Coys.

Never fear though... we have saints that will tell everything that they know about anyone coming in from any church within 100 miles. Lots of our folks are pretty tightly 'line bred' and everybody knows everybody because one way or the other they are related to everybody.

[Jermyn Davidson]

Originally Posted by AreYouReady?

Or is this just a regional thing?

I probably won't get any answers or if I do, it will be a denial. But....

I was told by a local church's board member that when someone leaves one UPC church for another, the Pastor is called from the former Pastor to tell his version of why that person left. Then it is passed on to the board members.

Board members can't keep anything quiet. They tell their wives and the wives tell other church members.

Then when the "new" person starts the new church hoping for a new start, he/she gets the cold shoulder from the people and the new pastor never brings the subject up to discuss it with the new member.

Please tell me it ain't so....!

I think part of what you said happens.

In fact, I think it is a good thing for Pastors to communicate in situations like this.

Unity is protected when Pastors communicate.

The Flock is protected when Pastors communicate, when the church member in question is someone that is disruptive.

Accountability is maintained when Pastors communicate.


It is up to the individual Pastors to keep such communications confidential, as the souls of more than one person is USUALLY at stake when stuff like this happens.


I don't think that Pastor's are purposely publishing the personal business of the souls of the people they are given charge over-- in board meetings or any where else. Neither do I believe that most of them handle situations like this in a way where someone can get hurt.


NEWS FLASH!
Most Pastors love the souls of the people that God allows them to serve.

[AreYouReady?]

Originally Posted by Jermyn Davidson

I think part of what you said happens.

In fact, I think it is a good thing for Pastors to communicate in situations like this.

Unity is protected when Pastors communicate.

The Flock is protected when Pastors communicate, when the church member in question is someone that is disruptive.

Accountability is maintained when Pastors communicate.


It is up to the individual Pastors to keep such communications confidential, as the souls of more than one person is USUALLY at stake when stuff like this happens.


I don't think that Pastor's are purposely publishing the personal business of the souls of the people they are given charge over-- in board meetings or any where else. Neither do I believe that most of them handle situations like this in a way where someone can get hurt.


NEWS FLASH!
Most Pastors love the souls of the people that God allows them to serve.

But, what if that person is not disruptive and the former pastor and member had a disagreement that neither was willing to work out? Does the member of the old church deserve the cold shoulder from the new church?

Of course it boils down to one person's word against the other. But most people automatically take the former pastor's side, lest they get shunned too. Perhaps the pastors should keep it to themselves and not tell board members anything?

[CC1]

I have no problem with pastor's communicating with each other about saints who move from one church to another but that communication should be private and held in confidence.

I will grant you that in old time Pentecost there are instances of preachers unfairly painting incorrect pictures of saints that have left their church out of anger and spite but they will have to answer to God for that.

The flip side of that is if someone is a serial troublemaker moving from church to church and sowing discord a pastor should be warned so they can deal with the person with their eyes wide open.

I would like to think that a godly pastor would be able to discern between truthful information shared for a good purpose and character assasination out of anger or spite.

[Jermyn Davidson]

Originally Posted by AreYouReady?

But, what if that person is not disruptive and the former pastor and member had a disagreement that neither was willing to work out? Does the member of the old church deserve the cold shoulder from the new church?

Of course it boils down to one person's word against the other. But most people automatically take the former pastor's side, lest they get shunned too. Perhaps the pastors should keep it to themselves and not tell board members anything?

No, no one deserves the cold shoulder because of a disagreement.

Pastor's should and I'd even say most do keep the details of sitautions like this to themselves, telling maybe the Assistant Pastor, which would mean their wives would probably know too.

I imagine they would want good things for the saint in question, as long as this person is not posing a threat to the Flock.


If this person is posing a threat to the Flock, then the new Pastor has a difficult situation on their hand-- one not so easy to quarterback from the comfort of my pew.

[Sherri]

Oh and once again..........I'm so thankful to be independent, and not a part of an organization.

[Titus2woman]

If someone is a troublemaker it won't take long to figure it out without anyone calling ahead to gossip about them.

Originally Posted by Jermyn Davidson

NEWS FLASH!
Most Pastors love the souls of the people that God allows them to serve.

NEWSFLASH: There are as many kinds of pastors as there are people filling the office. I was searching for something else and found this:

http://www.macon.com/2010/07/07/1187...link=email_msg

[houston]

The UPCI does or used to require a letter of transfer from one pastor to the next. Today, most probably just exchange a telehone call, if that. Something about ministerial ethics. I think it is a good idea.

[houston]

Originally Posted by AreYouReady?

Or is this just a regional thing?

I probably won't get any answers or if I do, it will be a denial. But....

I was told by a local church's board member that when someone leaves one UPC church for another, the Pastor is called from the former Pastor to tell his version of why that person left. Then it is passed on to the board members.

Board members can't keep anything quiet. They tell their wives and the wives tell other church members.

Then when the "new" person starts the new church hoping for a new start, he/she gets the cold shoulder from the people and the new pastor never brings the subject up to discuss it with the new member.

Please tell me it ain't so....!

Oh please!!