In the PC Beginning

[mfblume]

In the beginning God created the Bit and the Byte. And from those he created the Word. And there were two Bytes in the Word and nothing else existed. And God separated the One from the Zero and he saw it was good. And God said. "Let the Data be" and so it happened. And God said, "Let the Data go to their proper places." And he created floppy discs and hard discs and compact discs.

Thus God created computers and called them Hardware. And there was no Software yet. But God created programs small and big. And told them, "Go and multiply yourselves and fill all the Memory. And God said, "I will create the Programmer and the programmer will make new programs and govern over the computers and programs and data." And God created programmer and put him at data centre. And God showed the programmer the catalogue Tree and said, "you can use all the volumes and sub-volumes but do not use the windows."

And God said, "It is not good for the programmer to be alone," so He took a bone from the Programmer's body and created a creature that would look up to the Programmer and admire the Programmer and love the things the Programmer does. And God called the creature the user.
And the Programmer and the User were left under the naked DOS and it was good.

But Bill was smarter than all the other creatures of God. And Bill said to the User, "Did God really tell you not to run any programs?" And the User answered, "God told us that we can use every program and every piece of Data but told us not to run Windows or we will die."

And Bill said to the User, "How can you talk about something you did not even try? The moment you run Windows you will become equal to God. You will be able to create anything you like by a simple click of your mouse.

And the User saw that the fruits of the Windows were nicer and easier to use. And the User saw that any knowledge was useless - since Windows could replace it.

So the user installed the Windows on his computer and said to the programer that it was good. And the Programer immediately started to look for new drivers. And God asked him, "What are you looking for?" And the Programer answered, "I am looking for new drivers because I can not find them in the DOS. And God said, "Who told you you need drivers? Did you run Windows?"

And the Programmer said, "It was Bill who told us to!" And God said to Bill, "Because of what you did you will be hated by all the creatures. And the User will always be unhappy with you. And you will always sell Windows." And God said to User, "Because of what you did, the windows will dissapoint you and eat up all your resources, and you will have to use lousy programs, and you will always rely on the Programmers' help." And God said to the Programmer, "Because you listened to the User you will never be happy. All your programs will be errors and you will have to fix them and fix them to the end of time." And God threw them out of the Data Centre and locked the door and secured it with a Password.

[jfrog]

Originally Posted by mfblume

In the beginning God created the Bit and the Byte. And from those he created the Word. And there were two Bytes in the Word and nothing else existed. And God separated the One from the Zero and he saw it was good. And God said. "Let the Data be" and so it happened. And God said, "Let the Data go to their proper places." And he created floppy discs and hard discs and compact discs.

Thus God created computers and called them Hardware. And there was no Software yet. But God created programs small and big. And told them, "Go and multiply yourselves and fill all the Memory. And God said, "I will create the Programmer and the programmer will make new programs and govern over the computers and programs and data." And God created programmer and put him at data centre. And God showed the programmer the catalogue Tree and said, "you can use all the volumes and sub-volumes but do not use the windows."

And God said, "It is not good for the programmer to be alone," so He took a bone from the Programmer's body and created a creature that would look up to the Programmer and admire the Programmer and love the things the Programmer does. And God called the creature the user.
And the Programmer and the User were left under the naked DOS and it was good.

But Bill was smarter than all the other creatures of God. And Bill said to the User, "Did God really tell you not to run any programs?" And the User answered, "God told us that we can use every program and every piece of Data but told us not to run Windows or we will die."

And Bill said to the User, "How can you talk about something you did not even try? The moment you run Windows you will become equal to God. You will be able to create anything you like by a simple click of your mouse.

And the User saw that the fruits of the Windows were nicer and easier to use. And the User saw that any knowledge was useless - since Windows could replace it.

So the user installed the Windows on his computer and said to the programer that it was good. And the Programer immediately started to look for new drivers. And God asked him, "What are you looking for?" And the Programer answered, "I am looking for new drivers because I can not find them in the DOS. And God said, "Who told you you need drivers? Did you run Windows?"

And the Programmer said, "It was Bill who told us to!" And God said to Bill, "Because of what you did you will be hated by all the creatures. And the User will always be unhappy with you. And you will always sell Windows." And God said to User, "Because of what you did, the windows will dissapoint you and eat up all your resources, and you will have to use lousy programs, and you will always rely on the Programmers' help." And God said to the Programmer, "Because you listened to the User you will never be happy. All your programs will be errors and you will have to fix them and fix them to the end of time." And God threw them out of the Data Centre and locked the door and secured it with a Password.

LOL... that was pretty good.

[ManOfWord]

And then there was a Mac....................and when the user saw the Mac, he was set free from his Windows, and declared, "It just works! I am free from drivers! I am free from drivers! Thank God Almighty, I'm free from drivers!

And when the Creator saw the Mac, He said that it was good and that the user was redeemed from the previous error of his way. The user was to never turn back, go forth and multiply until peace reigned in system world once more!

No more need of "Bill."

"Steve" has set us free!

[Fiyahstarter]

Originally Posted by ManOfWord

And then there was a Mac....................and when the user saw the Mac, he was set free from his Windows, and declared, "It just works! I am free from drivers! I am free from drivers! Thank God Almighty, I'm free from drivers!

And when the Creator saw the Mac, He said that it was good and that the user was redeemed from the previous error of his way. The user was to never turn back, go forth and multiply until peace reigned in system world once more!

No more need of "Bill."

"Steve" has set us free!

You beat me to it! I was doing the same thing, except trying to figure in the word APPLE.

I'm a mac-ie too!

[Fiyahstarter]

I guess I could have accused you of partaking of the APPLE. LOL!

[RandyWayne]

Originally Posted by ManOfWord

And then there was a Mac....................and when the user saw the Mac, he was set free from his Windows, and declared, "It just works! I am free from drivers! I am free from drivers! Thank God Almighty, I'm free from drivers!

And when the Creator saw the Mac, He said that it was good and that the user was redeemed from the previous error of his way. The user was to never turn back, go forth and multiply until peace reigned in system world once more!

No more need of "Bill."

"Steve" has set us free!

And soon "Steve" made them wear a mark on their right hand or forehead without which they cannot buy or sell music or media, and the mark is the mark of man and his mark is "iTunes".

[ManOfWord]

Originally Posted by RandyWayne

And soon "Steve" made them wear a mark on their right hand or forehead without which they cannot buy or sell music or media, and the mark is the mark of man and his mark is "iTunes".

Is THIS the mark you're referring to?

[BeenThinkin]

Originally Posted by mfblume

In the beginning God created the Bit and the Byte. And from those he created the Word. And there were two Bytes in the Word and nothing else existed. And God separated the One from the Zero and he saw it was good. And God said. "Let the Data be" and so it happened. And God said, "Let the Data go to their proper places." And he created floppy discs and hard discs and compact discs.

Thus God created computers and called them Hardware. And there was no Software yet. But God created programs small and big. And told them, "Go and multiply yourselves and fill all the Memory. And God said, "I will create the Programmer and the programmer will make new programs and govern over the computers and programs and data." And God created programmer and put him at data centre. And God showed the programmer the catalogue Tree and said, "you can use all the volumes and sub-volumes but do not use the windows."

And God said, "It is not good for the programmer to be alone," so He took a bone from the Programmer's body and created a creature that would look up to the Programmer and admire the Programmer and love the things the Programmer does. And God called the creature the user.
And the Programmer and the User were left under the naked DOS and it was good.

But Bill was smarter than all the other creatures of God. And Bill said to the User, "Did God really tell you not to run any programs?" And the User answered, "God told us that we can use every program and every piece of Data but told us not to run Windows or we will die."

And Bill said to the User, "How can you talk about something you did not even try? The moment you run Windows you will become equal to God. You will be able to create anything you like by a simple click of your mouse.

And the User saw that the fruits of the Windows were nicer and easier to use. And the User saw that any knowledge was useless - since Windows could replace it.

So the user installed the Windows on his computer and said to the programer that it was good. And the Programer immediately started to look for new drivers. And God asked him, "What are you looking for?" And the Programer answered, "I am looking for new drivers because I can not find them in the DOS. And God said, "Who told you you need drivers? Did you run Windows?"

And the Programmer said, "It was Bill who told us to!" And God said to Bill, "Because of what you did you will be hated by all the creatures. And the User will always be unhappy with you. And you will always sell Windows." And God said to User, "Because of what you did, the windows will dissapoint you and eat up all your resources, and you will have to use lousy programs, and you will always rely on the Programmers' help." And God said to the Programmer, "Because you listened to the User you will never be happy. All your programs will be errors and you will have to fix them and fix them to the end of time." And God threw them out of the Data Centre and locked the door and secured it with a Password.

mf, you are truly in "full blume!" lol

BeenThinkin

[A.W. Bowman]

I run all of the above systems!

Mike - guys - loved it all!

Then - - -

110 010 001 000 111 101 (no parity) And, that is just for the old 18 bit binary machines!

If you liked that PC joke, I have a million of them.