Need prayer and renewal

[Strait&Narrow]

Desperately need to be renewed in the Holy Ghost first and foremost. Need God's strength, wisdom, and endurance in this situation. Whether this is a trial or a result of repeated backsliding or both... I feel turmoil and lack of rest and peace more than anything. Even during maybe a few days at a time when I can power through it to an extent it's still there...

I'm in a group living environment (approximately 15 young adults age 18-25) where there is a lot of drama, arguing, and high tensions. I'm reprimanded and accused by security and other residents, and I have a hard time reacting the Christ-like way that I should.

I desperately need God's wisdom, discernment, and patience, and to figure out how to stop thinking thoughts at a rate of 1000 MPH and over-stressing. And to stop yelling and arguing with people whether I'm right or not...

I have been repenting and telling God I want to change and never go back to sin and things I used to do again because I have done that far too many times and I need His guidance to reverse a downward spiral I feel I'm going down by reacting badly, and running on empty spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically, etc.,
But spiritually most importantly...

[Evang.Benincasa]

Just remember Jesus loves you. You have to love you as much as He loves you. You are doing ok. How do I know that? Because you are asking for prayer. Just slow down, and don't beat yourself up. Because the devil doesn't need the help.
It's one step at a time. You are going to make it, and even when you fall down. You don't have to go all the way back to the beginning. Just get up right where you fell and get back up. Keep walking forward in Jesus name.

I'll be praying for you.

Just keep holding on and moving forward. We will all get there if we just keep moving forward.

[MawMaw]

Praying for you brother. I hope you have some family you can lean on. Hopefully also a Pastor and Church family. I agree with Bro. Benicasa, we can make it if we just keep keepin on! He will not fail us nor leave us. Talk to Him often.

[CC1]

S&N, I am praying for you. Just take each day one hour, minute, and second at a time. Tell yourself that with God's help you will make the right decisions and have the right responses this hour and then when that turns into the next hour make it that hour. Before you know it you will have done that repeatedly. Eventually it will become a way of life as you break old habits and your nature and let Christ's nature be expressed through you.

[Strait&Narrow]

Thank you all for your prayers and encouragement. I'm maintaining an effort to do the right thing and juggling working overtime most weeks with a very unique overall situation.
Realizing that God has not given me more than I can handle (only with His help)
And Mawmaw yes I have a church family and pastor who were there for me when my family forsook me. I had a major drinking problem and some drug problems that burned bridges between me and my biological family for the several years prior to God drawing me to Him and to truth and repentance.

Funny enough, when my family (namely my mother), saw I was genuinely making a change, sober and making every effort to turn my life around, (all with God's help), she came around and gave me a place to stay while I was trying to get my life together job-wise.

What seemed to have really done it for her is that she realized the church I was attending believed in the Oneness of God, baptism of the Holy Ghost with the initial sign of speaking in other tongues, etc., which she quickly determined was a cult, similar to Mormonism, and Catholicism, which she had warned me about my whole life. She was very angry I was going to this Oneness Apostolic Pentecostal Holiness church and if I remember correctly that was the primary basis of our disagreements that led to her kicking me out again after I lived with her a few weeks.

Needless to say, and this is part of my testimony, God provided when my family forsook me, He helped me keep my job, blessed me with a place to live, and He had already sent me to the church I knew I belonged at just prior to all these other things. And my church family was always there for me, in the sense that they prayed for me, and that what they believed and testified to me was the same as what I believed God was showing me, and what I believed, and still believe to be truth.

I've grown distant with my church family and am starting to make an effort again to reconnect with them outside of just church on Sunday and midweek prayer (which I have mostly been missing due to work), but Lord willing things at work will continue to shake up and give me an opportunity to go to church at least once or twice a week...

[Amanah]

Praying for you Straight&Narrow. God is going to bring you through this so that you can praise Him and share your testimony to encourage others.