Dealing with someone with confidence/ fear issues.

[shazeep]

I really like MtDs answer; but this is a work of years. Lancy, you ask a question central to our problem, i think, and i will be following this, as i recognize it in people who would describe themselves as 'mature' Christians, prolly. It hardly needs repeating that we do not raise confident children now, we raise codependents. Many apt reflections there (at 'codependency'), as well. I believe that anxiety is an indicator of lip-service.

[Aquila]

Originally Posted by LancYP1990

As a minister, how can you help someone, kind of like a young person - who is dealing with a lot of fear and condemnation. They are so afraid of being blatently disobedient to God, or being lukewarm, that they scrutinize every little decision they make. It seems to me that their view of God is one of an angry God holding them over the flames of hell by a thread, instead of a loving God who wants to direct their life and save them. My suspicion is that they feel this way because of mistakes in their past. What would you say to help them gain their confidence in God back?

Emphasize grace and help them out of legalism.

Legalism can bring this sense of fear and condemnation.

They should fear God over their sinful behaviors and their carnal struggles. But this fear should be a holy reverence that brings them to the foot of the cross in confession and an honest reasoning with God over their human condition. They need to cease focusing so much on their failures and focus on their identity in Jesus. The truth is... we become what we focus on. If we focus on our sin and failures... they will never cease. If we focus on grace and growing into Christlikeness in spite of our human weakness... we'll see vast improvement we never thought was possible.

[ILG]

As a minister, how can you help someone, kind of like a young person - who is dealing with a lot of fear and condemnation. They are so afraid of being blatently disobedient to God, or being lukewarm, that they scrutinize every little decision they make. It seems to me that their view of God is one of an angry God holding them over the flames of hell by a thread, instead of a loving God who wants to direct their life and save them. My suspicion is that they feel this way because of mistakes in their past. What would you say to help them gain their confidence in God back?

That was me back in the day. I'm glad you want to help. Love them. Love them. Love them.