Own, Apologize, Repair

shazeep · #1 09-02-2016, 06:53 AM

Coming back to integrity

https://norasamaran.com/2016/08/28/v...n-not-all-men/

"Instead, after pretending to do process for a bit, sabotaging it by making it clear he was ‘standing near the exit’ about to bolt at any time, and didn’t really have any desire to hear, he went on the attack and told us all to stop talking, even to one another, or we would be “hearing from his lawyers.” Not because anything we had said was untrue, but because he “felt so bad” at hearing himself “described in this way” that when he could no longer control the narrative, he needed to silence the person he had harmed and all those around her. Never mind his lauded ‘ally’ identity and his many books about organizing: when push came to shove, he could not initiate or actively step in to wanting to do accountability simply because it made him too uncomfortable to try to understand or grow from what he had done."

aegsm76 · #2 09-02-2016, 08:33 AM

What I got out of the mishmash of psychological jargon.

She is still greatly traumatized by her childhood.
And wants to blame everyone else for the way her father acted.

shazeep · #3 09-02-2016, 09:17 AM

hmm, i thought she was quite forthcoming about her position there, and even admitted to her shortcomings in counseling men like her father. She hardly seemed unreconciled to me. Got a quote to illuminate your point?

"Guilt is not empathy. Neither is shame. In fact, when people feel overwhelmed by their own inner feelings of guilt, they are more likely to attack the people around them rather than act empathetic. Feeling guilt does not make you a good person. Empathy and responsiveness make you a good person. Guilt blocks empathy."

shazeep · #4 09-02-2016, 09:27 AM

also, her interactions with her father seemed by way of explanation, and quite ancillary to the point of the article?

shazeep · #5 09-02-2016, 11:58 AM

aegsm76 · #6 09-02-2016, 12:32 PM

shaz - I almost thought the article was written tic.
It seemed to insult almost every group the it is fashionable to insult, these days.

Esaias · #7 09-02-2016, 02:02 PM

From the link: "As a white person who does antiracism education in the university classroom I am not unfamiliar with this phenomenon."

lol

Tells me all I need to know. More SJW propaganda meant for the gullible.

shazeep · #8 09-02-2016, 02:58 PM

hmm, not sure what SJW means. You have a problem with personal responsibility? Or just for white people, or what?

Quote:

Originally Posted by aegsm76

shaz - I almost thought the article was written tic.
It seemed to insult almost every group the it is fashionable to insult, these days.

are we reading the same article? the one about explaining to a kid the difference in hurting others v the pain of personal growth? who got insulted? i mean besides you two being insulting here on the forum?

Was there some denigration of pro football or Hank Williams Jr that i missed or something?
I guess personal responsibility is a touchy subject for bigots, huh, yikes.
My guess is you both saw yourselves in dad or something, and you're suffering some defense reaction, because unless you got something better than

"As a white person who does antiracism education in the university classroom I am not unfamiliar with this phenomenon"

followed by an inane comment, you are not making any sense. At all. You do realize this article is not about you, right? Wasn't directed at you, etc. Of course it is just a basic restatement of the Golden Rule, so some resistance by a wasp preacher is only natural, i guess, but i mean, really? I'm curious what your wives would say here--were they allowed to, you know, actually express their opinions in public?

aegsm76 · #9 09-02-2016, 03:09 PM

shaz - that was not her point.
Her point was anyone who does not believe the same as she does about white privilege/guilt/racism is like a child who needs to be educated.

shazeep · #10 09-02-2016, 03:24 PM

"This is the demon that I feel arising in my classroom around week three as we talk about the hard facts of colonization, of our collusion with it as settlers, and that it has not ended but is ongoing."

gimme a break, she examines the emotionally stunted from pretty much every angle. If you got defensive, well gee i wonder why. She is hardly being a raging feminist or anything. Yeesh.