A Year and A Day

[Trouvere]

I don't know if its just cultural tradition but growing up acadian ,people mourned their loved ones a year and a day.Reading about someone remarrying and having asked how long was the spouse deceased got me to thinking along these terms.I have heard it remarked in the last year of preachers who were dating in six weeks.I am sure that each case is different and I am sure there are a hundred opinions but for myself I would not be comfortable running out and finding another person so soon.I have over twenty years invested in marriage and children.This isn't just a date or a going steady relationship.
We are married.When this person dies I am not going to be ready to run out and shop for a spouse.I never hear from any of the churchs what and where
holiness comes into play in this instance.
I read that cc1's pastor remarried but it was after a year or more.I would be interested in knowing what he preaches concerning this.I understand that some feel they won't have but a few years left but that does not matter as far as Jesus is concerned.
What does your church teach? What do you teach? Do you even go there
in teaching? What about your culture? There are cultures that feel differently about remarriage.Thanks in advance for your replies.One day some of us may face this issue.I can't ignore the fact that as days pass I am not getting any younger.

[seguidordejesus]

I teach myself (to myself) that I should wait until at least the funeral! (per CC1's theory!)

Seriously, though, I wasn't looking for a wife when mine came along. I love her and would want to be rid of her, but if I were to be widowed, I would probably wait a really long time, just because.

Then again, I didn't know what I was missing before, did I?

[Sherri]

We don't teach anything on this one way or the other. This is totally out of a pastor's jurisdiction, as far as I'm concerned. It's between the person and God

Personally, I would want to think Eddie would wait a LONG time if something were to happen to me, but realistically he probably wouldn't. Men don't like to live alone.

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by seguidordejesus

I teach myself (to myself) that I should wait until at least the funeral! (per CC1's theory!)

Seriously, though, I wasn't looking for a wife when mine came along. I love her and would want to be rid of her, but if I were to be widowed, I would probably wait a really long time, just because.

Then again, I didn't know what I was missing before, did I?

Hope she doesn't read this.......teehee!

Small typo that makes a BIG difference.

[MissBrattified]

I don't think it's a matter of "holiness", and it is rather personal. I think it seems a little more appropriate and socially acceptable to wait a little while.

I can tell you something that does get on my last nerve, though...people who date right after a divorce! Or, worse yet, before the divorce is even finalized.

Come on. The union should've meant more. If you're not heartbroken by the loss or departure of a spouse, you should at least pretend that you are....



On our worst day ever, I would still be crushed at losing Jeff, whether by death or distance. I really don't understand those who are casual about the loss of a relationship. Makes me a little mad.

But I've gotten sidetracked...once a spouse dies, the only person who can ultimately deal with the sadness and loneliness is the widow/widower, and if that means remarrying someone and/or finding a new companion, then more power to them. I don't know how I might react, because I've never been there.

I certainly don't think there's anything unchristian about it (remarrying [quickly] after the death of a spouse. I think it's more about etiquette, but it's really none of my bizness, and I would just hope for the most happiness possible.

[Trouvere]

I read a book today that was about earlier America and it also described the year and a day of mourning.It also described that the women used to wear
mourning attire.


BTW the divorce thing I can understand why you hate it.I knew a couple who were separated maybe two weeks and the wife was at singles conference.
Marriage means more than that.To some though evidently it doesn't.

[Coonskinner]

Originally Posted by seguidordejesus

I teach myself (to myself) that I should wait until at least the funeral! (per CC1's theory!)

Seriously, though, I wasn't looking for a wife when mine came along. I love her and would want to be rid of her, but if I were to be widowed, I would probably wait a really long time, just because.

Then again, I didn't know what I was missing before, did I?

This is a staggering statement!

[Coonskinner]

Originally Posted by Sherri

We don't teach anything on this one way or the other. This is totally out of a pastor's jurisdiction, as far as I'm concerned. It's between the person and God

Personally, I would want to think Eddie would wait a LONG time if something were to happen to me, but realistically he probably wouldn't. Men don't like to live alone.

I would want to make sure Sarilda's tracks were out of the yard at least.

But I have prayed and asked the Lord to not let her go before me, so I am not worried about it.

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by Coonskinner

I would want to make sure Sarilda's tracks were out of the yard at least.

But I have prayed and asked the Lord to not let her go before me, so I am not worried about it.

That's so sweet! I hope Sarilda understands how really lucky she is (and I think she does)!!