I am protective to a fault...

[Barb]

This story has disturbed me ever since I first heard it...



PRAIA DA LUZ, Portugal (AP) -- The disappearance of 4-year-old Madeleine McCann, the British girl who vanished from her hotel room in southern Portugal while her parents dined 50 meters away, has captivated hearts and triggered debate around the world.

Were her parents negligent to leave her and her two younger siblings alone, even for a brief time? Or should they have been able to expect a certain level of safety in this family-friendly resort town?

The questions raised cut right to the heart of a universal vulnerability that terrifies parents everywhere. Yet answers differ widely -- revealing cultural differences within Europe and across the Atlantic.

In Portugal and much of the rest of southern Europe, where parents often take their young children along with them to smoky bars, many have accused the McCanns of neglect, despite the fact they were at a poolside restaurant just seconds away from the room and say they went back to check on their sleeping children every half hour.

"You shouldn't leave (young children) alone," said Francisco Vieira, a 77-year-old father of two grown children who works as a parking lot attendant near the beach in Praia da Luz.

He said an abduction is "not the kind of thing you'd expect here, but you still shouldn't risk it. We never left our children alone. We'd either take them with us or one of us would stay behind."

Culture clashes have emerged as a theme in child dramas in the past.

Toddler left on sidewalk

In 1997, a Danish toddler was left in a stroller outside a New York restaurant while her mother dined and drank inside, prompting diners to phone police and complain.

After being arrested for neglect, the mother claimed the practice was common in her native Denmark and sued the city for false arrest. The charges were dropped and she was eventually awarded $66,401.

Six years later, a Swiss father was arrested on charges of child endangerment after a maid discovered his 2-month-old in the family's Waldorf-Astoria hotel room while he and his wife were out to lunch.

"We are nice people and good parents. It's just a matter of a different culture," the wife told The New York Post, calling it a simple mistake. Here, too, charges were eventually dismissed.

Even mild criticism of the McCanns has caused outrage in Britain, where the nation has rallied around the family and the case has become a media phenomenon, drowning out news coverage of Gordon Brown's likely selection as the new prime minister.

Images of the blond little girl are ubiquitous on TV and in print, and the issue dominated radio and TV shows for two weeks until the decision not to send Prince Harry to Iraq briefly eclipsed the McCann saga.

Celebrities like J.K. Rowling and Richard Branson have pledged large chunks of money to a reward fund that currently tops £2.5 million ($4.9 million).

The British tabloids, which have sent packs of newshounds to Praia da Luz, have responded to Portuguese criticism of the family by taking aim at the local police, complaining about lack of information and perceived lack of progress in the case.

They have taken to calling the police chief "hapless" and accused other officers of being asleep on the job.

Friends of the McCanns have described them as doting, overprotective parents, insisting there is no way they could have imagined their child would be snatched from the resort compound while they sat so nearby.

Portuguese police have questioned the parents extensively as witnesses, but have not named them as suspects in any crime.

Jon Clarke, 34, a physics teacher in London, said parents in Britain are not encouraged to take their children to restaurants, and that he would consider leaving his own 3-year-old alone if it was in a safe place where he could easily check on her.

"What difference would it have made if the parents were in the same building?" he said. "We've had cases in the last 20 years where people break in when the parents are in the next room."

Children more accepted in Spain

In Spain, which is famously child-friendly, what the McCanns did is all but unheard of. Spanish parents take their kids everywhere, and it is common to see small children running around a town square while their parents have drinks well into the night.

"People just say, 'Oh well, they'll sleep late tomorrow,"' said Ines Alberdi, a professor of sociology and family issues specialist at Complutense University in Madrid.

Spaniards, she said, "do not totally separate children's entertainment from parents' entertainment. I think that is a very strong tradition here."

Magda Carlan, a 37-year-old Portuguese housewife with daughters aged 2 and 4, reflected this view as she blamed the McCann parents for their own nightmare. "Children should never be left alone. It is wrong. When I go on vacation with small girls I am very careful."

Madeleine disappeared on May 3. Robert Murat, a 33-year-old British man who lives near the hotel, has acknowledged that police are questioning him as the only suspect in the case, though he vehemently denies wrongdoing. Police have released him for lack of evidence, but say he remains a suspect.

The media frenzy has whipped up a certain hysteria among many parents in Britain, resulting in a surge in interest in electronic tracking devices that could potentially help police find missing children.

Richard Howells, a professor of cultural and creative industries at King's College in London, said the case has touched a nerve in Britain because it is so easy to identify with the family.

Many Britons vacation in the Algarve region of Portugal, where Praia da Luz is located, drawn by its reputation as an affordable family holiday destination.

"You can project yourself in that situation and you can feel how they're feeling, how terrible it is," he said. "Even though you don't personally know them, you feel through the media that you can."

Copyright 2007 The Associated

[Barb]

I am so overly protective of children, that I just can't imagine leaving them alone.

Of course these poor parents are heart sick and thought all was well, but mercy...I just can't imagine it!!

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Barb

I am so overly protective of children, that I just can't imagine leaving them alone.

Of course these poor parents are heart sick and thought all was well, but mercy...I just can't imagine it!!

Barb,

I am with you on this one. You should NEVER leave your children unattended...especially in a foreign country. The parents will have this heartache with them their whole lives.

This is one thing that I cannot relate to. It is a mother's worst nightmare to have a child hurt or missing. I pray God grant peace without measure, and mercy that they find the child and she be alive.

In Jesus name.

Originally Posted by Barb

This story has disturbed me ever since I first heard it...



PRAIA DA LUZ, Portugal (AP) -- The disappearance of 4-year-old Madeleine McCann, the British girl who vanished from her hotel room in southern Portugal while her parents dined 50 meters away, has captivated hearts and triggered debate around the world.

Were her parents negligent to leave her and her two younger siblings alone, even for a brief time? Or should they have been able to expect a certain level of safety in this family-friendly resort town?

The questions raised cut right to the heart of a universal vulnerability that terrifies parents everywhere. Yet answers differ widely -- revealing cultural differences within Europe and across the Atlantic.

In Portugal and much of the rest of southern Europe, where parents often take their young children along with them to smoky bars, many have accused the McCanns of neglect, despite the fact they were at a poolside restaurant just seconds away from the room and say they went back to check on their sleeping children every half hour.

"You shouldn't leave (young children) alone," said Francisco Vieira, a 77-year-old father of two grown children who works as a parking lot attendant near the beach in Praia da Luz.

He said an abduction is "not the kind of thing you'd expect here, but you still shouldn't risk it. We never left our children alone. We'd either take them with us or one of us would stay behind."

Culture clashes have emerged as a theme in child dramas in the past.

Toddler left on sidewalk

In 1997, a Danish toddler was left in a stroller outside a New York restaurant while her mother dined and drank inside, prompting diners to phone police and complain.

After being arrested for neglect, the mother claimed the practice was common in her native Denmark and sued the city for false arrest. The charges were dropped and she was eventually awarded $66,401.

Six years later, a Swiss father was arrested on charges of child endangerment after a maid discovered his 2-month-old in the family's Waldorf-Astoria hotel room while he and his wife were out to lunch.

"We are nice people and good parents. It's just a matter of a different culture," the wife told The New York Post, calling it a simple mistake. Here, too, charges were eventually dismissed.

Even mild criticism of the McCanns has caused outrage in Britain, where the nation has rallied around the family and the case has become a media phenomenon, drowning out news coverage of Gordon Brown's likely selection as the new prime minister.

Images of the blond little girl are ubiquitous on TV and in print, and the issue dominated radio and TV shows for two weeks until the decision not to send Prince Harry to Iraq briefly eclipsed the McCann saga.

Celebrities like J.K. Rowling and Richard Branson have pledged large chunks of money to a reward fund that currently tops £2.5 million ($4.9 million).

The British tabloids, which have sent packs of newshounds to Praia da Luz, have responded to Portuguese criticism of the family by taking aim at the local police, complaining about lack of information and perceived lack of progress in the case.

They have taken to calling the police chief "hapless" and accused other officers of being asleep on the job.

Friends of the McCanns have described them as doting, overprotective parents, insisting there is no way they could have imagined their child would be snatched from the resort compound while they sat so nearby.

Portuguese police have questioned the parents extensively as witnesses, but have not named them as suspects in any crime.

Jon Clarke, 34, a physics teacher in London, said parents in Britain are not encouraged to take their children to restaurants, and that he would consider leaving his own 3-year-old alone if it was in a safe place where he could easily check on her.

"What difference would it have made if the parents were in the same building?" he said. "We've had cases in the last 20 years where people break in when the parents are in the next room."

Children more accepted in Spain

In Spain, which is famously child-friendly, what the McCanns did is all but unheard of. Spanish parents take their kids everywhere, and it is common to see small children running around a town square while their parents have drinks well into the night.

"People just say, 'Oh well, they'll sleep late tomorrow,"' said Ines Alberdi, a professor of sociology and family issues specialist at Complutense University in Madrid.

Spaniards, she said, "do not totally separate children's entertainment from parents' entertainment. I think that is a very strong tradition here."

Magda Carlan, a 37-year-old Portuguese housewife with daughters aged 2 and 4, reflected this view as she blamed the McCann parents for their own nightmare. "Children should never be left alone. It is wrong. When I go on vacation with small girls I am very careful."

Madeleine disappeared on May 3. Robert Murat, a 33-year-old British man who lives near the hotel, has acknowledged that police are questioning him as the only suspect in the case, though he vehemently denies wrongdoing. Police have released him for lack of evidence, but say he remains a suspect.

The media frenzy has whipped up a certain hysteria among many parents in Britain, resulting in a surge in interest in electronic tracking devices that could potentially help police find missing children.

Richard Howells, a professor of cultural and creative industries at King's College in London, said the case has touched a nerve in Britain because it is so easy to identify with the family.

Many Britons vacation in the Algarve region of Portugal, where Praia da Luz is located, drawn by its reputation as an affordable family holiday destination.

"You can project yourself in that situation and you can feel how they're feeling, how terrible it is," he said. "Even though you don't personally know them, you feel through the media that you can."

Copyright 2007 The Associated

I could see it if the kid (the British girl) was a teenager but she was only four. There's no excuse for leaving the child unattended like that - likewise with the other examples - and it has nothing to do with one's culture.

[Subdued]

I'm sitting in a hotel room right now and I would **NEVER** leave my children unattended!!!!! (I do leave my 15 y.o. son alone in the room; but my 12 y.o. & 7 y.o. daughters... NO WAY! Not even WITH my son!)

My daughters just walked down the hall, about 5 doors down, to look out a window and I went with them. The very thought of sending or leaving them alone scares me!

[BrotherEastman]

Originally Posted by Barb

I am so overly protective of children, that I just can't imagine leaving them alone.

Of course these poor parents are heart sick and thought all was well, but mercy...I just can't imagine it!!

And whats wrong with being overprotective? I'll probably be the same way.