Cooking Bloopers

Esther · #1 12-29-2009, 10:04 PM

I was thinking it would be fun to share some cooking bloopers. I will start this thread in the FH and move it later to the Chef's Corner.

One that we discussed this week was about how my sister was making a batch of Oatmeal Cookies and told my Mom we didn't have enough salt. My Mom said, "I sure thought I had some salt". My sister said, "There was only a 1/2 cup of salt and the recipe calls for 3/4 cup".

My Mom declares rather loudly, "There isn't a recipe on God's green earth that calls for 3/4 cup of salt"!

I thought, WOW! My Mom really knows how to cook if she knows how much salt a recipe calls for without even seeing it.

Then she told my sister to bring her the recipe, so she did. The recipe was written like this:

3/4 cup soft
shortening

My sister read that as 3/4 cup salt instead of "soft".

We were sure glad we didn't have 3/4 cup of salt in the house. Can you imagine what would have happened? Might have blown up in the oven. lol

missourimary · #2 12-30-2009, 09:14 AM

I knew a bachelor that burned hotdogs-he put them on to boil and fell asleep. When he woke up the water had boiled away and the remnants of supper were charred to the bottom of the pan. It was funny til I put eggs on to boil one night. Working in the next room, I suddenly heard several shots fired. It took me a few minutes to realize the "shots" were coming from my kitchen-the eggs had boiled dry.

Esther · #3 12-30-2009, 01:17 PM

My brother cooked a can of biscuits once for 10 minutes in the microwave. You needed a chisel to get them out of the pan.

freeatlast · #4 12-30-2009, 01:30 PM

On a camping trip sevearl years ago, Bill's wife had broght along a canned ham.

A nice fire was burning hot in the fire ring, so Swanee decided to cook the ham in the fire pit.

The ham had been roasting for a half hour or so when something sounding like a small bomb exploded. Pieces of ham, hurtling the the trees.

That was the day that Swanee learned that you must first open a canned ham before placing it in a fire pit.

missourimary · #5 12-30-2009, 01:52 PM

Twisp · #6 12-30-2009, 02:09 PM

An aunt of mine used a dry measuring cup whilst measuring wet liquids once. Happiness did not ensue.

Blubayou · #7 12-30-2009, 03:57 PM

I was very young, and cooking from a recipe with my mother- The recipe said saute the onions- I read it salute- and asked my mother why does it want you to salute the onions?

dizzyde · #8 12-30-2009, 04:38 PM

The first time my sister made gravy, she called my mom for directions. It was one of those "a little bit of this, a little bit of that" type of recipe, and my sister heard a couple of CUPS of flour, instead of TABLESPOONS...

Needless to say, the gravy came out a little more like a brick! LOL!

MissBrattified · #9 12-30-2009, 05:14 PM

Most of my friends know that I cook nearly everything from scratch, but one Sunday we were having friends over, and I decided to do things the easy way. I bought a frozen lasagna, a box of Texas Toast and the only thing I made was a salad. Unfortunately, I put the lasagna in the bottom oven, instead of the top one that was preheated, so it was about an hour behind by the time I discovered it. I then realized when I read the box that it had to cook for an hour and 55 minutes instead of the 55 minutes I thought I read. By the time THAT was finally ready, we were all starving...and then I burnt the Texas Toast. The toast was seriously like hard croutons! lol

Worst meal EVER at my table! I'm better cooking food from scratch than using boxed convenience food! (I guess that means I'm not good at reading and following directions!)

Margies3 · #10 12-30-2009, 05:17 PM

My sister came to visit me one time when I lived 3 hours away from our hometown. I had just bought a new set of pans the week before she came.

Sally thought she would be nice and make a pan of chili for supper while I was working. She made the chili (just a small amount) and then turned it on low on my electric stove and went outside to sit on the steps and wait for me to get home. Unfortunately, we had never had an electric stove in our entire lives. You can guess what happened!

I got home and we walked in the front door of my apartment building. It was immediately evident that someone's supper was being burned to a crisp. Guess what! It was OURS!!

I grabbed the pan with two potholders and went to put it outside off my balcony (don't ask me why. It was instinctive!). When I picked up the pan, the burner came right with it!! It had melted my pan right onto the burner!!!!!