Gabby's

Originally Posted by CareyM

I'll be praying for you...I love you and know this will not be easy for you.

Thank you for your prayers...I think its going to be OK...I am going as me, and that may be the hardest for her...but she does love me as I do her so I have to believe God is going to make a way for us...

I so appreciate your answers and your prayers.

I think that the Lord has shown me a great deal in the last few days.

I realized I was angry at dad. I was so angry because he never cared. He never wanted to be my father. And I was frightened -I was worried that perhaps I had acted in a way the if I died my family would not care. They would not be able to grieve because they would feel that there was no reason to grieve.

And I was angry with the preacher for going on and on about how he had been a Christian for 50 years and I wanted to throw up. he had not been a Christian and the way he was was one of the reasons that I became an athiest.

I called my children and asked them to forgive me if I had done anything that would keep them from feeling sorrow when I died. That sounds so selfish, but really all you are here on earth, when you die, is the memories that you leave behind. I want my children to have many happy memories. The memories of my dad is bruised flesh, torn skin, hateful words. I had nightmares that just woke me screaming and crying for years. The Lord took those from me, Praise God.

The memories will fade.

I turn it all over to my God His hands hold me close, His hands are not raised to hit and hurt. His hands are gentle and full of love.

So to ayone that is reading this.

If you have done anything to anyone and you have a chance to make amends you really should do it. Especially to your family because you do not want their memories of you to bring them pain.

[rgcraig]

Adra,

Sounds like you have found some answers and have made some positives steps in making things right in your life.

I like the advice someone gave you too that to feel "nothing" for your dad was an emotion too. I believe you found us here to be able to receive some love and support!

[LaVonne]

Originally Posted by Sister Truth Seeker

Thank you for your prayers...I think its going to be OK...I am going as me, and that may be the hardest for her...but she does love me as I do her so I have to believe God is going to make a way for us...

I'm glad you are going as you...and I do understand what you mean by that. God is able...have a great day!

[QueenEsther]

Good Morning!!! I can already tell that this week is dragging.......we had a late night last night and I am tired and I woke up this morning with a horrible stomachache but I am at working trying to push through it. We have church tonight - I am looking forward to that.

I hope everyone here has a GREAT day today!!!

[QueenEsther]

I received this email today and thought it was really really great!


~ A Baby's Hug ~



We were the only family with children in the restaurant. I sat Erik
in a high chair and noticed everyone was quietly sitting and
talking. Suddenly, Erik squealed with glee and said, 'Hi.' He
pounded his fat baby hands on the high chair tray. His eyes were
crinkled in laughter and his mouth was bared in a toothless grin, as
he wriggled and giggled with merriment.



I looked around and saw the source of his merriment. It was a man
whose pants were baggy with a zipper at half-mast and his toes poked
out of would-be shoes. His shirt was dirty and his hair was uncombed
and unwashed. His whiskers were too short to be called a beard and
his nose was so varicose it looked like a road map.



We were too far from him to smell, but I was sure he smelled. His
hands waved and flapped on loose wrists. 'Hi there, baby; hi there,
big boy. I see ya, buster,' the man said to Erik.



My husband and I exchanged looks, 'What do we do?'



Erik continued to laugh and answer, 'Hi.'



Everyone in the restaurant noticed and looked at us and then at the
man. The old geezer was creating a nuisance with my beautiful baby.
Our meal came and the man began shouting from across the room, 'Do
ya patty cake? Do you know peek-a-boo? Hey, look, he knows peek-
a-boo.'



Nobody thought the old man was cute. He was obviously drunk.



My husband and I were embarrassed. We ate in silence; all except for
Erik, who was running through his repertoire for the admiring
skid-row bum, who in turn, reciprocated with his cute comments.



We finally got through the meal and headed for the door. My husband
went to pay the check and told me to meet him in the parking lot.
The old man sat poised between me and the door. 'Lord, just let me
out of here before he speaks to me or Erik,' I prayed. As I drew
closer to the man, I turned my back trying to sidestep him and avoid
any air he might be breathing. As I did, Erik leaned over my arm,
reaching with both arms in a baby's 'pick-me-up' position. Before I
could stop him, Erik had propelled himself from my arms to the man.



Suddenly a very old smelly man and a very young baby consummated
their love and kinship. Erik in an act of total trust, love, and
submission laid his tiny head upon the man's ragged shoulder. The
man's eyes closed, and I saw tears hover beneath his lashes. His
aged hands full of grime, pain, and hard labor, cradled my baby's
bottom and stroked his back. No two beings have ever loved so deeply
for so short a time.



I stood awestruck. The old man rocked and cradled Erik in his arms
and his eyes opened and set squarely on mine. He said in a firm
commanding voice, 'You take care of this baby.'



Somehow I managed, 'I will,' from a throat that contained a stone.



He pried Erik from his chest, lovingly and longingly, as though he
were in pain. I received my baby, and the man said, 'God bless you,
ma'am, you've given me my Christmas gift.'



I said nothing more than a muttered thanks. With Erik in my arms, I
ran for the car. My husband was wondering why I was crying and
holding Erik so tightly, and why I was saying, 'My God, my God,
forgive me.'



I had just witnessed Christ's love shown through the innocence of a
tiny child who saw no sin, who made no judgment; a child who saw a
soul, and a mother who saw a suit of clothes. I was a Christian who
was blind, holding a child who was not. I felt it was God asking,
'Are you willing to share your son for a moment?' when He shared His
for all eternity.



The ragged old man, unwittingly, had reminded me, 'To enter the
Kingdom of God , we must become as little children.'



If this has blessed you, please bless others by sending it on.
Sometimes, it takes a child to remind us of what is really
important. We must always remember who we are, where we came from
and, most importantly, how we feel about others. The clothes on your
back or the car that you drive or the house that you live in does
not define you at all; it is how you treat your fellow man that
identifies who you are.



This one is a keeper.



'It is better to be liked for the true you, than to be loved for who
people think you are......'

QE....this is the best....I agree...'It is better to be liked for the true you, than to be loved for who
people think you are......

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by Sister Truth Seeker

QE....this is the best....I agree...'It is better to be liked for the true you, than to be loved for who
people think you are......

Amen! Hope your visit with your daughter went well.

[Tina]

Whew... what a day!

Today was the Young at Heart luncheon for December. It's always a lot of fun-- but I'm always exhausted after doing the cooking & serving.

Now I'm trying to relax and work up the energy to make it back to church by 6pm for Tuesday night prayer meeting.

Did I mention that I'm tired?

Originally Posted by rgcraig

Amen! Hope your visit with your daughter went well.

It did go well, we had some serious conversation, and plan on meeting again in January. My daughter has a lot on her plate and many extenuating circumstances that complicate our relationship...She said she wanted me in her life, to what degree we will take slowly....


Thanks so much for asking....I love her so much and just want so much to be closer to her, but I must leave it in Gods hands and let it happen in His timing!