★ Houston's Hangout ★

[Walks_in_islam]

Originally Posted by MarcBee

I certainly will, although I rarely allow myself such caloric luxury (once a year I suppose.) But in this case, here, I brought you some, too.

I am sensitive (more likely "suspicious") towards an offer of ice cream by a stranger named 'sport'

[MarcBee]

Originally Posted by Walks_in_islam

I am sensitive (more likely "suspicious") towards an offer of ice cream by a stranger named 'sport'

You are the one who labeled me and a few others here, "sport."
Fine, I gave the ice cream to Timmy just before it melted, and he well survived.

[Luke]

Originally Posted by Walks_in_islam

I am sensitive (more likely "suspicious") towards an offer of ice cream by a stranger named 'sport'

Probably a wise choice lol

[Walks_in_islam]

Originally Posted by MarcBee

You are the one who labeled me and a few others here, "sport."
Fine, I gave the ice cream to Timmy just before it melted, and he well survived.

Timmy examples faith in this issue.

Don't take nicknames personally. As I recall it was awhile back, it was during a discussion of priests and altering boys, and you earned it. You could always choose to man up and move on. Or not.

[shazeep]

Originally Posted by Timmy

Did you know that "with all due respect" was an insult, originally? Used in the context of talking to someone who doesn't deserve any respect, in the opinion of the speaker, it subtly (or not) brought attention to that opinion (the implied amount due being zero), with a wink and a nudge (figuratively, at least).

funny how there's two ways to look at everything. i guess. while i have felt your pov here, i frequently (lately, anyway) mean the phrase on its face. hmm.

[shazeep]

heard this guy, Hou? wow.
i heard 'leadership,' don't see it, just grabbed a mix.

the church would have us focus, work on, our sins. please stop.
you are forgiven. does this then mean that you can go sin? nooo...

[houston]

Morn'n

[houston]

So this is what's been going on in my small world. I tried chelation with cilantro. I put lots of cilantro in a blender with some fruit. Drank it. Twice in one day. I felt ill. My blood pressure dropped. Two weeks later (don't know if it's related) I lost an amalgam while flossing. Another week or so after that I lost an amalgam.

I downloaded 2 m2m hookup apps. I have been preaching the gospel on these apps. I never initiated contact. My profile pic was a cross. Headline was "Repent" until it was deleted. Guys contacted me out of curiosity. Some thought it was a joke. Others attacked me. Some wanted a debate. Overall it has been an interesting experience. One plants, another waters, God gives the increase.

I haven't viewed porn in 18 days. That feels great!

There are going to be some changes at work soon. Pray with me that it goes in my favor.

And now you're caught up.

[BrotherEastman]

Originally Posted by houston

I am gay. I have not been active in 6 years. I am a Christian. I am not a gay christian.
I hate sex. I love the idea of sex. I have an inordinate focus on self.
Within the past year I have become addicted to pornography.

I hate myself more every time I indulge.

I want to die.
I am exhausted. There's no fight left in me.

What was the purpose of all this? What does God want from or for me? I don't get it, I don't understand. Nothing makes sense.

It was nice hanging around forums. They help to distract me, to distract me from "this."

But, I am tired of reading about and (poorly) attempting to discuss the weightier matters of scripture. I can't, I don't live a victorious Christian life.

Much can be said about my background and being conditioned blah blah blah to make an emotional response, and not learning to walk/live by faith blah blah blah. Regardless, when all is said and done there are no excuses. There will be no one to blame but myself.

The inner turmoil is too much. No, I'm not checking out. I'm not even going to become active again.

I would like to wake up tomorrow morning knowing that this all had been a dream.

In the meantime I need to, I have to step away for a while.

You all have been great.

Thank you.

Houston, I know I'm not your friend; However, I understand your frustrations and I am going to pray for you. I am sorry for your hurts and if I was at any time callous towards you I am truly sorry. God bless you my friend.

[BrotherEastman]

Originally Posted by houston

I have a confession to make. I have fear and anxiety because I don't trust God.

that happens to me too sometimes Houston, God loves you!!!!!!!