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  #51  
Old 10-05-2010, 01:41 PM
coadie coadie is offline
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

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Originally Posted by ManOfWord View Post
And that is where WE are. ANYTHING I post is inexplicable to you. It is what it is. That is not a problem for me nor are the things you post a problem for me. You post from your viewpoint and you're completely within your freedom to do so. So am I. It is just unfortunate that you don't grant the same grace to me and my ranting/posts that you accuse me of withholding from others.

A successful coach is one who does two things well: #1 Builds up the athlete for his/her effort even when it is sub-par or uncharacteristic of them. #2 Later points out what they could have done better to reach their goal.

The time to take responsibility is BEFORE one makes a choice. The more important a choice it is, the more gravity one should take in deliberation. We don't always have a lot of time to do so. I've made some really bad decisions in my life before and after salvation in which people were hurt. I was responsible for every one of them and I still refuse to be a victim. We are more than conquerors through HIM! Not in ourselves. I still fall at the feet of the One who is able to keep me from falling.
Personal responsibility is what separates winners from whinners.
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  #52  
Old 10-05-2010, 01:48 PM
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

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Originally Posted by Mr. Smith View Post
I wondered if you'd make this a personal issue. I'm sorry you feel that way. I think it's, one, a copout, and two, simply not the truth. Did you read this from just a couple of days ago?

http://apostolicfriendsforum.com/sho...1&postcount=40

Your absolute statement bolded above is absolutely not true. Again, I'm sad you feel the way you do about me.

I don't see where the coach comparison comes in. But if you wanna go there, yesterday, Hunter Mahan choked at the worst possible time and hit a chip shot about two feet on a 30 foot shot, something you'll almost never see a pro golfer do. And it was at the worst moment. It gave Team Europe the coveted Ryder Cup.

At the press conference following, a reporter was grilling Mahan about the flub and he (Mahan) eventually broke into tears. It was an awkward moment and good etiquette would have been to move on to another question. Instead, the reported continued and asked what Mahan felt after he blew the shot. He tried to speak, no words would come out, and Phil Mickelson, who was sitting next to him, took the microphone and said, "Why don't we move on to another question." Our family was watching and we cheer Mickelson for having enough wisdom to not drill Mahan any more.

So at some point down the road, you or someone else would like to give "coaching tips" to this father who has suffered the worst of losses, and give him pointers on how to improve his memory, maybe there would be a time when that might work.

But for now? I can't imagine anything except what I've already said.

You didn't answer my question about my absent-mindedness and going to my old house and trying to get the garage door opener to work, was I being irresponsible or not caring enough, or do you think my brain may not function in the same ways other's do?
Sorry, I forgot about the exception quoted above and I'll change my words to almost always. My bad. But you know exactly what I mean, don't play naive. It may work with others, but not me.

I'll answer your question quite simply: Who really cares about simple absent mindedness when it comes to a garage door opener? However, if you "forget" the rules of the road and run a red light because you got confused about the red/green thing, you don't deserve to drive any longer. If I can't responsibly care for my children I shouldn't have that responsibility. It's not emotional, it's practical. If I can't do it, then I shouldn't.

If my job performance as pastor regarding serving people and speaking degrades to the degree that it's not getting done, then I should retire or resign, one of the two. It has nothing to do with feeling sorry or whatever. I've resigned from positions because I couldn't give what it required. And it wasn't in defeat. It was simply the right thing to do for all involved.

Try to get into my garage with your opener and I'll laugh along with you. That's just funny.

Try to take my child out of my house because you think it's yours and I'll call the cops......or worse! That's NOT funny.
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  #53  
Old 10-05-2010, 01:48 PM
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

Ruled accidental:

http://www.sun-sentinel.com/news/bro...,6864021.story

And seems others have an opinion about this too:

http://www.sun-sentinel.com/health/s...,5552289.story
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Last edited by rgcraig; 10-05-2010 at 01:51 PM.
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  #54  
Old 10-05-2010, 01:49 PM
coadie coadie is offline
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

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Originally Posted by OnTheFritz View Post
Unbelievable and idiotic thing to say in this context. I pray that you never have to experience what this man is going through.
You really don't know what you are talking about. You are not a psychologist with tools to determine if thoughts are idiotic or not. It doesn't bother me. MOW is a prison chaplain. He is in a different league.

17By faith Abraham, when he was tried, offered up Isaac: and he that had received the promises offered up his only begotten son,

18Of whom it was said, That in Isaac shall thy seed be called:

19Accounting that God was able to raise him up, even from the dead; from whence also he received him in a figure.

Some of us get our strength from trust in God. God will carry this man thru the tragedy.
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  #55  
Old 10-05-2010, 01:59 PM
coadie coadie is offline
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

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Originally Posted by rgcraig View Post
It looked like it was. That doesn't make it easier for a dad. I have seen accidents and people had to fight charges in addition to the loss.
The hardest part will be to forgive himself.
I saw a woman just last Thursday that was in a home bible study of mine. Her baby was killed by a family pet dog. Her husband didn't get over it as well as she appeared to. The first lesson, I walked past a porch covered with flowers from the funeral.
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  #56  
Old 10-05-2010, 02:04 PM
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

Quote:
Originally Posted by ManOfWord View Post
Sorry, I forgot about the exception quoted above and I'll change my words to almost always. My bad. But you know exactly what I mean, don't play naive. It may work with others, but not me.

I'll answer your question quite simply: Who really cares about simple absent mindedness when it comes to a garage door opener? However, if you "forget" the rules of the road and run a red light because you got confused about the red/green thing, you don't deserve to drive any longer. If I can't responsibly care for my children I shouldn't have that responsibility. It's not emotional, it's practical. If I can't do it, then I shouldn't.

If my job performance as pastor regarding serving people and speaking degrades to the degree that it's not getting done, then I should retire or resign, one of the two. It has nothing to do with feeling sorry or whatever. I've resigned from positions because I couldn't give what it required. And it wasn't in defeat. It was simply the right thing to do for all involved.

Try to get into my garage with your opener and I'll laugh along with you. That's just funny.

Try to take my child out of my house because you think it's yours and I'll call the cops......or worse! That's NOT funny.

No, actually I DO NOT know what you're talking about. We've talked extensively in the past about the damage the resolution did to the UPC and we've even traded PM's about it. In fact, you looked through our church website and we talked a good bit about the direction and genre of our church. No naivety going on here. I'm just trying to be truthful and accurate.

So are you saying that a person that runs a red light doesn't deserve to drive??? At all?? I guess that's the extreme position you're taking here that baffles me. I've driven for 28 years and I've had one ticket. I'd match my driving skills with anyone. But I've run a red light when my mind was totally pre-occupied with something else. It happens. Sometimes in life we screw up. Sometimes we screw up badly. It happens to us all and it shouldn't eliminate us from functioning through our lives. You seem to be implying that if we screw up, that's it. I just can't agree with that.

There is a brain function called "Basal Ganglia." It's the part of the brain that processes routines. Maybe this will let you see things a little differently than the rigid absolutes of responsibility.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basal_ganglia
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  #57  
Old 10-05-2010, 02:09 PM
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Baron1710 Baron1710 is offline
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jermyn Davidson View Post
This is not a dumb question Baron.


Over the last two years, there has been one situation after the other that has come into my life. There have been times I have asked why.

I don't think I am the only Christian that has ever asked God why.

In faith, we are to deal with the fact that the God who loves us and we love does allow tragedy.

I don't pretend to know what this Pastor and father is going through, but I can imagine and empathize with some of the thoughts that may come into the mind of the person going through.


As my friend, I sincerely hope that you never are in a situation where you look to the hills and ask God why.


The point wasn't to blame God as much as it was to empathize with a man that is going through a terrible tragedy.
I don't blame God for not doing for me what I should do myself, nor do I blame God for the actions of others. I am a free will guy and if God starts turning bullets into Jello to protect the innocent...well there goes free will.
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  #58  
Old 10-05-2010, 02:15 PM
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Smith View Post
No, actually I DO NOT know what you're talking about. We've talked extensively in the past about the damage the resolution did to the UPC and we've even traded PM's about it. In fact, you looked through our church website and we talked a good bit about the direction and genre of our church. No naivety going on here. I'm just trying to be truthful and accurate.

So are you saying that a person that runs a red light doesn't deserve to drive??? At all?? I guess that's the extreme position you're taking here that baffles me. I've driven for 28 years and I've had one ticket. I'd match my driving skills with anyone. But I've run a red light when my mind was totally pre-occupied with something else. It happens. Sometimes in life we screw up. Sometimes we screw up badly. It happens to us all and it shouldn't eliminate us from functioning through our lives. You seem to be implying that if we screw up, that's it. I just can't agree with that.

There is a brain function called "Basal Ganglia." It's the part of the brain that processes routines. Maybe this will let you see things a little differently than the rigid absolutes of responsibility.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basal_ganglia
Sorry, my "ganglia" isn't working too well at the moment. What were we talking about?

Maybe I should take my own advice and not post any more, since I'm obviously not very good at being clear in what I mean.

Maybe they'll eventually find the "sin" particle which will finally, once and for all, explain why we sin..........then we'll all have something to blame and we'll finally be able to live in bliss w/o fear of judgment!
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  #59  
Old 10-05-2010, 02:33 PM
coadie coadie is offline
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Smith View Post
There is a brain function called "Basal Ganglia." It's the part of the brain that processes routines. Maybe this will let you see things a little differently than the rigid absolutes of responsibility.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Basal_ganglia
Most of the hands on experience from craniotomies i have forgotten since the 70's.

Dorsolateral prefrontal cortex (dlPFC) is a learning center.
In the prefrontal cortex there are very few dopamine transporting proteins, and dopamine is instead inactivated by reuptake via the norepinephrine transporter, presumably on neighboring norepinephrine neurons, then enzymatic breakdown by catechol_O_methyl transferase (COMT) into 3-methoxytyramine.

Basal ganglia keep you from peeing in your pants when you fall asleep or run a red light. Basal ganglia are an anatomical part and not a brain function.
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  #60  
Old 10-05-2010, 02:39 PM
coadie coadie is offline
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Re: apostolic pastor leaves child in car that died

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Originally Posted by ManOfWord View Post
Sorry, my "ganglia" isn't working too well at the moment. What were we talking about?

Maybe I should take my own advice and not post any more, since I'm obviously not very good at being clear in what I mean.

Maybe they'll eventually find the "sin" particle which will finally, once and for all, explain why we sin..........then we'll all have something to blame and we'll finally be able to live in bliss w/o fear of judgment!
You are doing fine. Smitty is bluffing. He is fooling himself more than you.
Freud took the anti christian path and tried to redefine sin as mental illness.
The bible is a great psychology book and the secularitsts wanted to formulate all their own theories of human behavior. No different than the darwinists wanted to write their own book of creation.

Many of the anxiety disorders are an extension of guilt and get medicated instead of confessed and forgiven.
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