For those who want to know...RULES at my church! - Page 56

LaVonne · #**551** 11-02-2007, 05:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by The Mrs

LOL...yes, I've seen that show, and I understand.

I also understand why it's almost absolutely unbelievable to her...she knows who we are talking about, but my guess is she is only an acquaintance, not a good, close friend of theirs. I will say this; they are some of the kindest, gentlest, wisest people I know. But it doesn't change their leadership ability. This is how they were taught to run a church, and have gathered through the years what it takes to keep people 'saved'. They put their whole hearts into it. But it doesn't make it right. It's still controlling with cult-like tendencies. I'm sure that if they knew that, they would make changes immediately.

Another factor is, these were not 'set in stone' rules. If you were to go up to their face and ask, 'Do you demand your people to consult with you before they make a major purchase?' I'm sure they'd say no. They didn't DEMAND anything. It all came subliminally through messages. It would be the story of the lady who went on vacation without asking 'permission' from the pastor first who was badly injured in a car wreck. If she had asked the pastor first, and he could have prayed about it, then surely God would have directed him and impressed on him 'yeah' or 'nay' as to whether it would be a good idea or not. He could have saved her from that terrible wreck.

I remember one time one of the elders who had been there for YEARS getting up and saying, 'If you go on vacation, and didn't consult with the pastor first, and you get in a wreck, don't you DARE go calling the pastor and ask him to come pray for you.' At the time, I remember amening it on the outside, but on the inside, I think something died in me. It shocked me and hurt me, but I didn't realize it at the time.

Looking from the outside in, you would never guess these kinds of things were being 'taught'. But they were. I can't tell you how many times I've heard the verse 'Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves: for they watch for your souls'. I trusted them completely, totally, and blindly. Without question.

I think one of the main problems with how things were running when we left was that it bred fear, even among the saints. You couldn't even hardly fellowship with any of the saints in your own church for fear that someone would be offended by something someone did wrong, and even worse, our children molested, or commit adultery among ourselves. These were the SAINTS. Those who you labor amongst. Those who should be your best friends and help through the years. Those who were supposed to be 'holy'. I understand the need for caution, but it went overboard to assume distrust first. Looking back on it now, it really saddens me. We were all such good friends, but it became all very superficial because of the distrust.

This is an excellent point! This is exactly how the church was run. So many times, I heard through others what was expected and what some of the "hidden rules" were.

dizzyde · #**552** 11-02-2007, 05:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thad

my guess is independant. I know quite a few that don't believe in Doctors or dentist.

I went to one church where all the old people had no teeth once.

the pastor didn't allow false teeth!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yes, they was independant

the pastor had a mid wife - the woman had to use her to deliver their babies

It sounds to me like it probably was one of the independant churches.

Yeah, the no doctors ones always get to me, in my observations those rules usually change right about the time the Pastor or someone in his family start to have serious health problems.

SoCaliUPC · #**553** 11-02-2007, 05:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BoredOutOfMyMind

SoCali, that was bad, but this post was uggggggggggggggggggly!

Care to say why?

When someone has gone through what she went through...most people leave altogether and equate a relationship with God as this.

Elizabeth · #**554** 11-02-2007, 05:06 PM

I wanted to say this earlier after reading so many of the reports here.

I wish I heard it sooner!

I recently heard this said by a non oneness Pastor-but it should apply to everyone!

No one should hand over complete control of their lives to another person!

dizzyde · #**555** 11-02-2007, 05:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by aquestioninggirl

In our situation the Affair preacher left and moved to many different churches. even before he came to our church he had affairs at other churches. It looks like if that keeps happening they could take his licenses away.

Sister, I don't know the situation that you are refering to, but I do know that for charges to be brought against a preacher, it cannot be just on accusation based on hearsay. Someone directly involved in the situation has to be willing to bring charges against the preacher, and in many, many cases, people are not willing to bring formal charges.

SoCaliUPC · #**556** 11-02-2007, 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dizzyde

I agree, in my experience, I was very disallusioned with the church and the ministry (and I will point out it was really just one person who reduced me to this state), and I didn't want anything to do with it, and I did have a lot of peace when I first left. But eventually I knew that I needed more, and luckily at that point I had been back around really loving, truly Christian people, and I found my way back into relationship with God.

BOOMM....it is THIS type of a post that I was referring to. When someone goes through something as tragic as spiritual abuse, it is commendable that they did not leave God altogether.

dizzyde · #**557** 11-02-2007, 05:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jeanie

I wanted to say this earlier after reading so many of the reports here.

I wish I heard it sooner!

I recently heard this said by a non oneness Pastor-but it should apply to everyone!

No one should hand over complete control of their lives to another person!

That is a lesson that too many learn too late! I am one of them! But, I agree, 100%!