Starting With Me - Page 3

Baron1710 · #21 03-09-2010, 09:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrsMcD

This sounds as though you are talking about my 13 year old son. God bless you!

Sorry to tell you it only gets worse. He is 16. I think the thing that drives me nuts is he wants the privileges of an adult and still act like a child.

Pressing-On · #22 03-09-2010, 09:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

You don't know what true fear is until you have a teenager. Fear of all of the horrible consequences that could befall them because of bad choices. Fear that you totally stink as a parent, even though you particularly tried to do a good job.

Consequently, you have to truly learn what it means to trust God.

I think that is the most fearful thing - raising children.

But I had more fear raising a daughter than a son. Girls just cannot mess up and come out smelling like a rose. No one ever seems forget what a girl does wrong.

My daughter would say, "Why can't I go here or do that? My brother got to go and do.....?

I had to say, "You are a girl! You can't do the same things that boys are allowed to do!" LOL She never did get that!

This is very funny. Her Nutrionalist was doing a stress test on her. He wanted to find out what makes her relax the most because he told her that she works too hard and needs to find something to do, every day, that is relaxing.

After the test he found out that the most relaxing thing she can relate to is when she played football with her brother! LOL! Next was reading a book. LOL!

MrsMcD · #23 03-09-2010, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baron1710

Sorry to tell you it only gets worse. He is 16. I think the thing that drives me nuts is he wants the privileges of an adult and still act like a child.

I can imagine that it gets worse but hopefully, like everyone else that has been there says - it will get better and we will make it through these tough stages.

Pressing-On · #24 03-09-2010, 09:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baron1710

Sorry to tell you it only gets worse. He is 16. I think the thing that drives me nuts is he wants the privileges of an adult and still act like a child.

Very normal for a 16 year old. 18 is just around the corner in their eye. LOL!

Baron1710 · #25 03-09-2010, 09:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrsMcD

I can imagine that it gets worse but hopefully, like everyone else that has been there says - it will get better and we will make it through these tough stages.

Lucky me, as soon as one gets through this age I have another right behind him. My daughter creates less havoc but I am sure that as she is almost 13 things are going to get interesting.

rgcraig · #26 03-09-2010, 09:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baron1710

Sorry to tell you it only gets worse. He is 16. I think the thing that drives me nuts is he wants the privileges of an adult and still act like a child.

I'll never forget what my brother told my mother one time when he was about 16. He said, "one day I feel like an adult and the next day I feel like a kid."

I think the days they feel like a kid is when they act up trying to "hide" the fact they indeed are still a kid.

Does that make sense?

It's a confusing time for them too.

MrsMcD · #27 03-09-2010, 09:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rgcraig

I'll never forget what my brother told my mother one time when he was about 16. He said, "one day I feel like an adult and the next day I feel like a kid."

I think the days they feel like a kid is when they act up trying to "hide" the fact they indeed are still a kid.

Does that make sense?

It's a confusing time for them too.

I remember going through so many emotional phases. It really is a difficult time.

*AQuietPlace* · #28 03-09-2010, 09:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Baron1710

Lucky me, as soon as one gets through this age I have another right behind him.

Me, too.

And we had just managed to get one through these stages when the second came along. Now another one waiting in line to get his drivers license with all the fun that entails. Many evenings my husband and I just sit and look at each other with blank stares.

You know why God made babies so adorably cute, right? It's so the human race would not come to a screeching halt.

*AQuietPlace* · #29 03-09-2010, 09:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrsMcD

I remember going through so many emotional phases. It really is a difficult time.

I would not be that age again for ANYTHING.

dizzyde · #30 03-09-2010, 11:43 AM

It's weird but for me the hardest ages for my daughter were from about 8 to 11 or so. I always say that was the time when I just wanted to lock her in her room and just slip her food under the door! lol

It seemed like every time she opened her mouth she said the absolute wrong thing and everything she did was silly or sneaky. I was afraid to take her out in public or let her go off without me, you never knew what the child would say! My best friend though it was hilarious to get her off and let her start talking. She would call me and just be dying with laughter over something (lie or just silliness) my daughter had said. I would be mortified.

I would have never believed that she would transform in to the adolescent/teenager/adult that she did, and there lies the moral of what I am trying to say to you. NO matter what the age is that your child starts going through their awkward/troubled phase, the only option you have is to continue being the best parent you know how to be.

Continue saying and doing all of the things that you know are right, even if it feels pointless and like it is going NO WHERE. Absolute commitment to be a parent, to be strong and consistent in what you say and expect, no matter how many times you have to repeat the same lesson, is the only way, IMO.

I understand your reaction to the school problems, that was something that was so important to me as a parent. I always told my daughter, if her teacher/youth group leader/insert adult authority figure, told her to do something, unless it was morally wrong or put her in danger, she better do it.

If there was a real issue or problem with what was being instructed, then she could bring it to me later and we would deal with it together. And I made sure that I backed that up with her, there were a few times that I did go to school with her and demand accountability in the situation, but I wanted her to know that she had to respect authority first, and then try to fix the problem second.

Maybe not everyone would agree with that, but I think if a persons first inclination is to challenge authority, they are in for a rocky ride in life, from their relationships, to jobs and on down.