In preparing for Valentine's Day

[BoredOutOfMyMind]

"IT'S A GUY THING"
Translated: "There is no rational thought pattern connected
with it, and you have no chance at all of making it
logical."

"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR"
Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated: "I have no idea how it works."

"TAKE A BREAK, HONEY. YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Translated: "Are you still talking?"

"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Translated: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop,' the
address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle
identification number of every car I've ever owned... but I
forgot your birthday."

"OH, DON'T FUSS -- I JUST CUT MYSELF. IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Translated: "I have actually severed a limb but will bleed
to death before I admit that I'm hurt."

"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING."
Translated: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."

"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so
I'm completely clueless."

"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated: "What did you catch me at?"

"I HEARD YOU."
Translated: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said
and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so
that you don't spend the next three days yelling at me."

"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me and realize
it could be worse."

"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
Translated: "Oh, please don't try on one more outfit. I'm
starving."

"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated: "No one will ever see us alive again."

"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK."
Translated: "I make the messes; she cleans them up."

[rgcraig]

Good reminder.....

I better get my order in for flowers for me......lol!

[MrsMcD]

Originally Posted by rgcraig

Good reminder.....

I better get my order in for flowers for me......lol!

[Ferd]

a woman wrote this.

[Esther]

Originally Posted by Ferd

a woman wrote this.

You think?

[Ferd]

I edited a few for accuracy

"IT'S A GUY THING"
Translated: Talking is not required. We don’t need a
Big long word bash to understand it…go away.

"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translated: "Why isn't it already on the table?"

"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR"
Translated: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated: What you need to understand it that it works.

"TAKE A BREAK, HONEY. YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Translated: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Translated: "Are you still talking?"

"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Translated: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop,' the
address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle
identification number of every car I've ever owned... but I
forgot your birthday."

"OH, DON'T FUSS -- I JUST CUT MYSELF. IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Translated: "I have actually severed a limb but will bleed
to death before I admit that I'm hurt."

"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING."
Translated: :”Even if I explain it, you will act like I am an idiot so
Lets just cut to the chase. You go ahead and think I am an idiot
And I wont have to do a bunch of talking”

"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated: "I put my stuff right here, but once again it appears you ‘put
It where it belongs’”

"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated: "Oh boy another 20 minute beat down because I did something
Horrible enough for the UN to get involved, like leaving a cabinet door open.?"

"I HEARD YOU."
Translated: "Stop talking after the 18th time you said it, I still didn’t agree!"

"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Translated: "I am used to the way you yell at me and realize
the adjustment period of having some new woman yell at me would be too
Traumatic."

"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
Translated: "Oh, please don't try on one more outfit. I'm
starving."

"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated: "Watching you gloat and tell me ‘I told you so’ AGAIN is too much so
I am going to drive around until I figure out where I am so I wont have to hear it."

"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK."
Translated: "You do the work and I listen to you complain"

[Ferd]

I guess all the girls stormed off in a huff over my revision.

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by Ferd

a woman wrote this.

I think Theresa did!

[Ferd]

Originally Posted by rgcraig

I think Theresa did!

what she took some time off from beating her husband?

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by Ferd

I guess all the girls stormed off in a huff over my revision.

Ferd, yours are just as accurate!