Have You Ever Felt Like This?

[Jermyn Davidson]

I have felt like this writer before, actually over and over after every failure, my mind goes back to, "Well God was the One who allowed the events and circumstances that led to this failure in the first place."

This mindset usually breeds anger in me, towards God and His Sovereignty. Then, there are the thoughts of blaming myself, and then I get angrier because I have the knowledge that, "I probably would not be doing l, m, n, o and p if God had never allowed a, b, and c in the first place!"

So there's more anger which leads to distrust and a deep questioning of all things Christ.

Then I remember that I have experienced GOD-- His Love, His Mercy. I have seen HIS POWER at work in my life and in others in the past.

So I try to rectify my past experiences with GOD with my current failures and it leaves me dumbfounded.

"How could I..."

"It's impossible that a man who knows so much would..."

Then, the cycle of blame begins again. Blaming God, blaming myself, blaming others and God and myself-- knowing God didn't have to let the circumstances and events from years ago happen in the first place.

"If only my Dad would have not did this, say that!"

"Why GOD did you let it happen and how do you expect me to ever get over this!"


Agony!

Anger!

Resentment!

Pain!


Then Jesus somehow finds away to calm the chaos. He helps me to see that even though I chose to sin, He chooses to draw me back to His Side. Convicting me of my sins, and at the same time extending His Love deep into my wounded psyche, He reminds me of His Sovereignty.

"When I saved you, I knew where you would be today. Just come to me."


There's some resistance from me as I've been down this road before. I've fallen so many times before. Am I for real? Will I ever be real? Will I ever overcome? Is there really any hope of change in me?

I sob in brokeness, aware of my sins, aware of my need for a Savior.

I think again it's the same Savior that allowed all of this in the first place, and accept that reality because I want and need Him more than I want to blame Him.

He loves me and reassures me that it is His Will that I be made whole.

"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen."


The video below was very encouraging to me because I understand the mindset of the writer who makes the statement, "It is difficult for me not to attribute my temptations, at least indirectly to God, since He is in control of everything."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D49OgHQLpOM

[Amanah]

oh yes, I have travelled this road myself many times

[Jermyn Davidson]

A, B, and C may lend itself to L, M, N, O, and P, but it doesn't have to be the X, Y, and Z of my life.

[acerrak]

the the issue is and we all have been down this road, is that we blame the hardships of Life on God. God didnt say life would be easy. nor did he say that becomming a christian life would be care free.

I have issues but im not in a 3rd world country starving to death. Im blessed for what i have. Gods concern is the salvation of your soul,not to be rich and well off in this world.

we all have a different idea of what Needs are. some cant distinguish between their wants and needs either.

when im in tough situations like this, I remind myself im covered by His grace. Then i look back at all the answered prayers in my life and the people God has brought into my life.

These are my personal pillars that keep me up during hardships. Do i still question God? who doesnt? will we seek answers that will probably never get ? im sure we will.

But to blame God for all your troubles is nonsense. somethings happen, its part of life, as Jentzen franklin tells people, when bad things happen, "welcome to Life'

I know this may not be the comfort you seek, but sometimes life just stinks....

[Jermyn Davidson]

Speaking life isn't comforting people with soft words as much as it is letting them know that where they are someone else has already been and that yesterday and today doesn't have to define tomorrow.

[acerrak]

Originally Posted by Jermyn Davidson

Speaking life isn't comforting people with soft words as much as it is letting them know that where they are someone else has already been and that yesterday and today doesn't have to define tomorrow.

my pastor said once "that the mistakes we make today will not be what defines you on your epitaph"

meaning the way the world sees you is not the same way God sees you.

[KeptByTheWord]

JD: If we are all honest, we would have to agree with the first post you wrote. There are many things that happen in our lives that we can't understand why God allowed them. Yet, when I read scripture, especially the OT, I realize that many times the heavy hand of God on people brought about a greater, newer, much better thing.

I think of Hannah, barren for many years. She suffered greatly no doubt at the hands of the other wives of her husband. Her suffering was so great, and the pain in her heart so deep, she couldn't even speak to God, but just whispered the words. But through her suffering, God brought forth one of the greatest prophets Israel had ever had.

Look at Joseph. He went through incredible suffering to the point that many of us would have given up hope. Sold into slavery, jailed for doing the righteous honorable thing, and being forgotten when he had spoken truth... yet, through Joseph God chose to bring forth the great nation of Israel out of Egypt in a mighty, miraculous way.

I am sure you can think of many more examples than this.

So, when you are suffering, and you cannot understand "why" ..... remember those who suffered, Jesus Christ himself suffering the most of any of us.... and encourage yourself in the knowledge that the sufferings of this present time work to bring us to a higher, better place in our knowledge of Jesus Christ.

[Praxeas]

JD, what makes you a Republican OTHER than being registered as one?

[Jermyn Davidson]

Originally Posted by Praxeas

JD, what makes you a Republican OTHER than being registered as one?

I answered this question two times on the first thread you asked this and I even started a thread in the politics section where you could ask me politcal questions and I would answer with my true feelings-- which would demonstrate that I am "to the right" on many, if not most things politcal.

[Praxeas]

Originally Posted by Jermyn Davidson

I answered this question two times on the first thread you asked this and I even started a thread in the politics section where you could ask me politcal questions and I would answer with my true feelings-- which would demonstrate that I am "to the right" on many, if not most things politcal.

I asked you in THAT thread.