Here's some info from our small group tonight...
SELF-ESTEEM
Name something that you like about yourself.
SCRIPTURES:
Genesis 1:26-27,
Luke 12:6-7,
Romans 5:6-8,
Romans 8:31-39 2Corinthians 5:17-20
TOPIC: SELF-ESTEEM
Webster’s Dictionary defines self-esteem as a confidence and satisfaction in oneself or a favorable opinion of oneself. Self-esteem is vital because a person’s self-concept is at the very center of their mental and emotional functioning. It’s impossible to maintain a healthy emotional balance if we lack self-esteem and our self-confidence is shaky. Only by knowing and liking ourself will we be able to handle the daily challenges of life without falling apart. Keep in mind, however, that balance is crucial with self-esteem, because too much can lead to pride, and too little can lead to suicide.
People who are healthy emotionally have a kind of inner security. They don’t feel that their worth as a person is always on the line, or that they have to be perfect in order to be accepted and appreciated. They can tolerate a little gravy on their lapel without thinking that people will reject them.
Psychologists believe that self-esteem comes from good parenting in which unconditional love is given and received at a deep level. When a person receives this kind of love, an inner security naturally develops. On the other hand, people who receive too little love in life tend
to feel like a donut with a hole in the middle. They feel like something is missing, but they don’t know what.
People with low self-esteem tend to manifest it in different ways. Some have a disregard or disrespect for themselves, which occasionally leads them to openly criticize or show contempt for themselves. Others hide their low self-esteem by boasting, denying faults or mistakes, and by presenting a flawless image. It’s not uncommon for such people to criticize others in an attempt to bring them down to their level. Still others with low self-esteem feel compelled to prove their value by working harder, performing better, and doing more than the average person.
[Now read
Romans 12:3] Pride is thinking more highly of ourself than we ought to think. On the other hand, it’s wrong to think lower of ourself than we ought to think, too. Cutting ourself down isn’t humility, it’s self-abuse, and it’s also a lie.
Instead, we need to accept God’s opinion of us. The Bible tells us that God created mankind in His own image, which automatically makes us more valuable to Him than any other creature. Furthermore, the Bible says that those who believe in Christ are new creatures. No matter what our past, we have a brand new future in Jesus! Furthermore, Jesus has made us His ambassadors to the world! Since He esteems us so highly, we ought to have higher esteem for ourselves.
In addition, we ought to accept the fact that God loves us. The Bible says that, even when we were sinners, Jesus loved us enough to die for us. If we believe that the Bible is the infallible Word of God, then we ought to believe that He loves us. The problem is, many people lack faith in this area, and choose to believe their own negative opinion of themselves rather than God’s opinion.
It also helps to remember that people generally think of you as you present yourself to them. If you frequently put yourself down in front of others and express many doubts about yourself, they’ll soon share your negative opinion, and your self-esteem will drop even lower. On the other hand, if you’ll begin to esteem yourself, then others will begin to esteem you as well, and this, in turn, will boost your self-esteem even more.
Questions: (Key questions are marked: * )
1. Would you say that most of the people you know have high self-esteem, or do they lack self-esteem?
2. Psychologists claim that most of our self-esteem comes from our parents. Why do you think this is?
(* We accept our parent’s opinion of us. If they love and accept us, we tend to love and accept ourselves. If they reject us, we tend to reject ourselves.)
* 3. Why do others tend to view us the way we view ourselves?
(* Whether we realize it or not, we subconsciously send subliminal messages to others that show how much we esteem ourselves. Our speech, body language, and facial expressions reveal how we feel about ourselves, and this convinces others to see us the same way.)
* 4. How has low self-esteem affected your life?
* 5. How does trusting in God’s unconditional love increase our self-esteem?
(* If God loves us, we must have a high value. Once we truly start believing this, our self-esteem will increase tremendously because we will begin to see ourselves through God’s eyes. In other words, our self-esteem will increase once we substitute God’s high opinion of us for our low opinion of ourselves.)