Are you a victim or a survivor?

[TalkLady]

Originally Posted by Scott Hutchinson

That man told my Grandmother that God was going use me ,but He said the Lord told him to soak me like they soak boxers hands.
Let's just say that man was on me like white on rice.

My husband and I think you are hilarious.

[Scott Hutchinson]

Originally Posted by TalkLady

My husband and I think you are hilarious.

That man was ultra lib but he did care about me.
He taught people could be Holy Ghost baptized without speaking in tongues and things I can't teach but he did care about me.
Also he was the one who baptized me in Jesus Name.
I still have relatives in that church.

[Scott Hutchinson]

Originally Posted by TalkLady

My husband and I think you are hilarious.

I'm glad I make yall laugh.

[TalkLady]

Sometimes ultra libs can have more genuine caring than ultra cons. ....We categorize people as ultra libs and ultra cons by the outward appearance and sometimes (even though I am I suppose I am a moderate con to con...lol) I do wonder does GOD EVEN THINK like that "ultra lib" and "ultra con"....I can't speak for God, but I don't think He's doing all of this categorizing. It's heaven or hell and I just "wanna be on His list"...

GOOD NIGHT, ALL and PLEASE pray for Sis. Alvear's son who is traveling tonight through very dangerous Indian territory. (See her post.)

[chosenbyone]

Originally Posted by Malvaro

you know why this thread should be encouraging to everyone? because it shows that many, many people have been hurt.... but have chosen to be survivors, overcomers and conquerors!!! Ultimately, its a choice of attitude and mind-set....

AMEN!!!! Why should we dwell on the past when God has made us overcomers? Doesn't His word declare we are new creatures? We should never allow ourselves to follow the drumbeat of this world!

To take on the role of a victim is to take away from the power of the cross.

[Michlow]

Originally Posted by Malvaro

you know why this thread should be encouraging to everyone? because it shows that many, many people have been hurt.... but have chosen to be survivors, overcomers and conquerors!!! Ultimately, its a choice of attitude and mind-set....

Actually, I don't find that encouraging. It's like telling those who go to bed hungry because there is no money for food, or the woman whose husband takes his anger out on her with his fists, or the child who loses a parent.... "hey, stop whining, there are lots of people who have it worse than you."

And you know what, it's true. There is ALWAYS someone that has it worse then you. But that knowledge does absolutely nothing to diminish the very real pain and suffering that we experience.

You know how I feel when I am going through a very hard time and someone responds to me like that? I feel worthless. I feel invisible. I feel as if my pain is unimportant and meaningless. It makes ME feel unimportant and meaningless.

Tell me honestly, does that fact that others have lost children and survived, do anything to diminish the anguish a mother feels that her child is dead?

Does the fact that thousands upon thousands of people have lived through the pain of divorce, do anything to comfort those who lie awake at night, feeling so alone in their marriage bed?

Where is your love? Where is your compassion?

[Subdued]

Originally Posted by Michlow

Actually, I don't find that encouraging. It's like telling those who go to bed hungry because there is no money for food, or the woman whose husband takes his anger out on her with his fists, or the child who loses a parent.... "hey, stop whining, there are lots of people who have it worse than you."

And you know what, it's true. There is ALWAYS someone that has it worse then you. But that knowledge does absolutely nothing to diminish the very real pain and suffering that we experience.

You know how I feel when I am going through a very hard time and someone responds to me like that? I feel worthless. I feel invisible. I feel as if my pain is unimportant and meaningless. It makes ME feel unimportant and meaningless.

Tell me honestly, does that fact that others have lost children and survived, do anything to diminish the anguish a mother feels that her child is dead?

Does the fact that thousands upon thousands of people have lived through the pain of divorce, do anything to comfort those who lie awake at night, feeling so alone in their marriage bed?

Where is your love? Where is your compassion?

Michlow, I think you read about my daughter's broken arm in the other thread...??? I think what Malvaro might be trying to say is something like:

[Relating this to my daughter's injury...] It was a great comfort for me to know that the surgeon who fixed my daughter's arm was an experienced specialist in children's orthopedic surgery. I was grateful to him for sharing some sucess stories of other patients who had similar injuries. It helped me to see past my daughter's pain and know that she would get through it and become well again.

[Michlow]

Originally Posted by Subdued

Michlow, I think you read about my daughter's broken arm in the other thread...??? I think what Malvaro might be trying to say is something like:

[Relating this to my daughter's injury...] It was a great comfort for me to know that the surgeon who fixed my daughter's arm was an experienced specialist in children's orthopedic surgery. I was grateful to him for sharing some sucess stories of other patients who had similar injuries. It helped me to see past my daughter's pain and know that she would get through it and become well again.

Yes, it helped YOU, but did it do anything to alleviate your daughter's pain? Do you think at the moment that your daughter was experiencing the most intense pain of her life, that she gave any thought to the fact that months later the pain would be gone?

I think knowing that others have survived it helps the people watching their loved ones experience pain, more than it helps the people who are actually in pain.

[crakjak]

Originally Posted by Malvaro

With all the "I've been hurt by (fill in the blank)" and "sheep-bashing pastors/preachers" threads that are all so prevalent on AFF.... I thought I'd ask the question that few are bold enough to ask around here....


A victim is never able to get over their anger and bitterness, thus God is never able to bind up their wounds because of their unwillingness to let go, and spend the rest of their days thinking of themselves as a victim and martyr in life....


A survivor gets over their anger and bitterness, seeks God to bind up their wounds and hurts, and looks for any positives that have helped them become a better person through their bad experience(s)....


Face it! Everyone here on AFF has been hurt by someone during their lifetime!

So are you a victim or a survivor????

Everything that has come my way, God has turned for my good and His glory!!! No weapon formed against me shall prosper, for I am on the LORD"S side!! By the grace of God I am not the man I would have been, thru the blood of Jesus I am the righteousness of God. And from this reality I seek everyday to know where He is working in my world and how I can join Him in what He is doing.

I AM MORE THAN A SURVIVOR, I WALK IN THE FREEDOM WHEREIN THE SON HAS SET ME FREE, FREE INDEED!

[Subdued]

Originally Posted by Michlow

Yes, it helped YOU, but did it do anything to alleviate your daughter's pain? Do you think at the moment that your daughter was experiencing the most intense pain of her life, that she gave any thought to the fact that months later the pain would be gone?

I think knowing that others have survived it helps the people watching their loved ones experience pain, more than it helps the people who are actually in pain.

Actually, yes; I believe it was a SMALL comfort to my daughter when I told her that the pain that she felt from her injury was normal and that it, indeed, would come to an end.

Of course, she still felt the pain, and cried while asking, "When, Mom?" But she heard my words, which brought a bit of comfort.

I also think it helped to alleviate some fear. She was afraid that the pain she was feeling was beyond what was normal. She wondered if something was wrong with her because the meds didn't seem to be touching the pain. When I explained to her that sometimes the medication isn't strong enough and that she may need more, or another, it let her know that she was "normal."

So, yes; I think it helped HER in some small way. However, she still felt just as much pain and she still took just as long to heal.