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11-29-2008, 10:39 AM
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
Quote:
Originally Posted by ManOfWord
And just WHO would make something of it? Is someone's character that frail that someone would automatically think the worse? Do folks instantly think someone is "cheating?"
I'm sorry, I just don't think people are that mistrusting. If they are, the problem is much deeper than an innocent meeting. That is the absolute last thing I think of someone. We're too paranoid and fearful to even behave like decent human beings, IMHO.  |
Maybe you're right. I was always taught to avoid the opposite sex in the ministry. Never thought of it otherwise. But, a lot of things I was taught were wrong and messed up. However, someone who ministers in the UPC ought to do as RRFord says because they ARE that mistrusting. That is what people are taught.
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When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
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11-29-2008, 11:39 AM
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My Family!
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
Quote:
Originally Posted by ManOfWord
And just WHO would make something of it? Is someone's character that frail that someone would automatically think the worse? Do folks instantly think someone is "cheating?"
I'm sorry, I just don't think people are that mistrusting. If they are, the problem is much deeper than an innocent meeting. That is the absolute last thing I think of someone. We're too paranoid and fearful to even behave like decent human beings, IMHO. |
I tend to agree with you!
I didn't think twice about meeting you for breakfast or meeting Stephen - - - guess it's a matter of the mind/heart!
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11-29-2008, 11:49 AM
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
Quote:
Originally Posted by rgcraig
I tend to agree with you!
I didn't think twice about meeting you for breakfast or meeting Stephen - - - guess it's a matter of the mind/heart!
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I would always think twice. It was drilled, drilled, drilled into me not to do that. But sheesh. You don't just accidentally fall into bed. They say "Well, that's how it starts!" Well, of course it is. But just say no! Do we have any self control??
At church a while back, the pastor (evangelical) and assistant pastor were talking. The assistant is female. She was leaning into him and talking and laughing. But it looked so innocent. They were not thinking about sex!! Sometimes conditioning makes us think of it.
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Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the people doing it. ~Chinese Proverb
When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
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11-29-2008, 12:04 PM
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Forever Loved Admin
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
Renda was probably wearing red, and we all know what that means. She's 
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If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
2 Chronicles 7:14 KJV
He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? Micah 6:8 KJV
Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is. 1 John 3:2 KJV
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11-29-2008, 12:17 PM
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
I know I am going to take alot of flak for saying this, but it sure seems obvious to me that in general the everyday people (not clergy) are much more relaxed about meeting with people of the opposite sex than people in the clergy tend to be.
I would have absolutely NO problem at all meeting with MOW without a chaperone. You know why? Because it so very, very obvious how much he is in love with his own wife. And if I know that, I also have to believe that anyone who knows him also knows that. MOW could tell me that he met with any woman from here and I would never begin to question that it was inappropriate because I am so convinced of his commitment to his wife.
If someone is concerned that people would wonder about their actions if they met with someone of the opposite sex, then perhaps they need to portray to the world they live in their love for their spouse in a better way.
At the same time, I would not be uncomfortable meeting with any man from here alone. Because I know my commitment to Walt. I know I would never ever consider violating that.
So maybe some of it is just in knowing your own heart also.
RRFord, I see what you are saying. And I am not finding fault with you. I think that in your own way, you are protecting your wife's integrity by handling things this way. But I also think that it is just as acceptable to do it MOW's way 
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Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of a battle ! ! ! !  |
11-29-2008, 12:21 PM
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
Quote:
Originally Posted by Margies3
I know I am going to take alot of flak for saying this, but it sure seems obvious to me that in general the everyday people (not clergy) are much more relaxed about meeting with people of the opposite sex than people in the clergy tend to be.
I would have absolutely NO problem at all meeting with MOW without a chaperone. You know why? Because it so very, very obvious how much he is in love with his own wife. And if I know that, I also have to believe that anyone who knows him also knows that. MOW could tell me that he met with any woman from here and I would never begin to question that it was inappropriate because I am so convinced of his commitment to his wife.
If someone is concerned that people would wonder about their actions if they met with someone of the opposite sex, then perhaps they need to portray to the world they live in their love for their spouse in a better way.
At the same time, I would not be uncomfortable meeting with any man from here alone. Because I know my commitment to Walt. I know I would never ever consider violating that.
So maybe some of it is just in knowing your own heart also.
RRFord, I see what you are saying. And I am not finding fault with you. I think that in your own way, you are protecting your wife's integrity by handling things this way. But I also think that it is just as acceptable to do it MOW's way |
I'm sure RRFord had it drilled into him. For some, it is a cultural practice and has nothing to do with commitment. But some people are taught that it is wrong and then it actually CAUSES rumors if people don't abide by the teaching. (So, the teaching causes the distrust and rumors IMO.)
Ooooppss!! (ILG hijacked the computer and wrote this!!)
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11-29-2008, 12:26 PM
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
Quote:
Originally Posted by Emma Bontrager
I'm sure RRFord had it drilled into him. For some, it is a cultural practice and has nothing to do with commitment. But some people are taught that it is wrong and then it actually CAUSES rumors if people don't abide by the teaching. (So, the teaching causes the distrust and rumors IMO.)
Ooooppss!! (ILG hijacked the computer and wrote this!!)
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You make a very valid point there, Emma (or ILG. LOL)
I've known ministers who refused to ride around the block in a car with their own sister-in-law for FEAR that people would talk.
It's sad that people feel like they have to be bound by such fear, don't you think?
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Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of a battle ! ! ! ! |
11-29-2008, 01:29 PM
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
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Originally Posted by nahkoe
I think we agree. Especially on the bolded part. Starbucks coffee is evil. It's also awful. Although I will drink their caramel macchiatos. Does this make me a compromiser?
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Absolutely.
II meBNme 12 : 37 Thou shalt not adorn thy coffee with costly caramel. Thou shalt not wear coffee mustachio's either.
Now, we ALL know that facial coffee is a sin.
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11-29-2008, 01:32 PM
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Renewed
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
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You can't reach the world with your talents. People are sick and tired of religious talents. People need a Holy Ghost annointed church with real fruits to reach out and touch their lives. ~ Pastor Burrell Crabtree
In fact I think that the insinuation of "hateful" Pentecostals is coming mostly from the fertile imaginations of bitter, backslidden ex Apostolics who are constantly trying to find a way to justify their actions. ~ strait shooter
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11-29-2008, 01:35 PM
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Registered Member
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Re: Questionable Meetings of AFF Members
Quote:
Originally Posted by Margies3
You make a very valid point there, Emma (or ILG. LOL)
I've known ministers who refused to ride around the block in a car with their own sister-in-law for FEAR that people would talk.
It's sad that people feel like they have to be bound by such fear, don't you think?
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Very sad, especially when it comes with such condemnation and there is therefore now NO condemnation to them who are in Christ Jesus!
__________________
Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the people doing it. ~Chinese Proverb
When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
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