Quote:
Originally Posted by revrandy
this thread is somewhat funny...it's supposed to be beneficial to adults who are adults and minister to those who can actually have sex under the umbrella of marriage and yet the only topics that have seem to be successful have been nothing of real value to a marriage???
Interesting....excluding NECK who contributed some value...among a few other scattered comments....what value has this thread really produced other than to discuss 3 acts???  .... |
************************************************** *******
RevRandy,
I agree with your comments.
There are folks that want to talk about the Acts...
They do not want to talk about the value of their partner.
Each of these individuals need to take what makes them feel uncomfortable and apply that feeling to their spouse.
I had a friend who the act was not the problem the uncomfortable situation was always where his wife wanted to engage.
Such as in the car....
If one engages in a physical act with their spouse when they know their spouse feels uncomfortable with the expression.
Do they feel it is the obligation for the person who is uncomfortable to have to engage to show that they "love" their spouse?
In these situations does the person who is the agressor understand the retreat of their spouse emotionally.
Agressor simply means one who "assaults"
Assault can be more than just an act.
It can be an assault on the emotions and spirit of a person.
Does this spouse actually think that the self-esteem of their partner is lifted after these acts?
One more point as well.
Just because your spouse has engaged in an expression in the past.
Does not mean that they are interested in that expression each and everytime you engage in intimate physical expressions.
When one partner dominates the path each of these encounters will follow.
I do not care what you lable the act it is not healthy for your relationship.
If you feel your dominance is acceptable to your spouse.
Then have enough guts to engage in an open question and answer session with your spouse.
Do this over a 90 day sample.
Ask your spouse a few questions and then answer the questions as well.
Example questions:
Do you feel our time together was mutual?
Was it a time of sharing?
Was it loving?
Do you feel secure?
>>>>>>>
Many woman feel resentment and do not feel complete in their expression with their husband.
Because the husband is more captivated with what should be a preamble to a union between a husband and wife.
When a woman feels like her husband can't get enough of her physically.
Then this same man is no where to be found to help solve the problems with the children, the bills, the house, it is then very clear.
Her relationship with her husband is all about the physical.
Thus starts the tug of war.
Where will she find her place of dominance?
like when a woman asks her husband to take out the garbage.
It comes accross not in the form of a question but a battle cry to the husband.
She wants the garbage taken out not only by "him", But right now!
Why because every area that is not in the physical intimacy realm she will try and catch up to the dominace that is expressed over her in the bedroom.
I have made several of these mistakes over the years.
Then I would think in my mind...
What is the problem?
Do you think I first thought, what is going on with her?
I would think with each action their is an outcome.
I would change my attitude, actions, tone and expression.
Things always would come back into balance.
I could see my wife's shoulders lower and her smile return.
All of which are an expression of being at peace...
We all know when these intimate moments have been the best......
Linear Mode
