Quote:
Originally Posted by Angel48
The hurt is constant. It's a living hell, most every day, and can only imagine death would be a relief. If there is a God, he sees the need for me to be miserable, to feel pain and loss in everything.
Obviously , it's going to be a bad day... Wish I knew how to work thru it. Bible, church, etc.... Not helping .... Feel more forsaken than ever.
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I can feel the pain here. Thought about this post for a little awhile. While I never imagined that death would be a relief, I have, in my life, wished I was already dead so that I would not feel the hurts I was feeling at the time.
I was told by a few people that the reason people shied away from me was because I thought too deeply, was intense and most important, they did not know how they could help me and did not want to make me feel worse.
It is not the Savior's wish for you to feel miserable.
Sometimes it was all I could do just to keep my eyes on Christ and not look to the right or to the left because they were just distractions that Satan would put in my way to keep me feeling bad.
Consider St. John chapter 10 where Jesus talks about the sheep. The thief is Satan and we are the sheep.
7 Then said Jesus unto them again, Verily, verily, I say unto you, I am the door of the sheep.
8 All that ever came before me are thieves and robbers: but the sheep did not hear them.
9 I am the door: by me if any man enter in, he shall be saved, and shall go in and out, and find pasture.
10 The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
Satan is that thief that comes to steal, kill and destroy any happiness and joy you might have in life. But look, Christ tells us that He came to give the sheep (us) life, that we would have it more abundantly.
I have been at a time in my life when I felt I could not work through a situation that i thought would never leave. So...what I did was just stood still. Or knelt. Or flat on my face. There were times I just did not even have the words to pray. I just silently pled from my spirit to God to help me because my misery was so great I could not even talk. And...I trusted and had what little faith I could muster up go to Him to take care of my problem.
Sometimes we just have to enter in the door anyway we can and wait on Christ to minister to us...even when we feel our pain will never let up. Satan will only take what you let him take from you. Whereas Christ wants us to have our life more abundant than we can ever dream imaginable with peace, joy and laughter.
Take a close look at verse 27: My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me:
28 And I give unto them eternal life; and
they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand.
29 My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father's hand.
30 I and my Father are one.
I promise you...this pain will not last forever if you place your trust and all this pain in the Savior's hands...and just wait on Him to show Himself mighty on your behalf.
People talk about pastors abusing saints, but never stop to think sometimes pastors are abused by saints, too. I prayed about situations and saw prayers answered the VERY NEXT DAY, over and over again! People would come and make it right. What a time we had that year. I hope I never go through that kind of ordeal again.
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