Can church be bad for your health?

[nahkoe]

Originally Posted by Aquila

This individual would love to attend church more often. However, the negative thoughts, memories, suicidal feelings, stress, cold sweats, head aches, anger, and the outbursts that follow are too much to handle. Is it healthy to continue to argue, prod, and get this person to attend after they've voiced this issue? Do they need more time? Are they reprobate? Should they try to find alternative expressions for their faith that don't involve traditional churches? I'll admit, this is one reason why I lean far more towards the house church philosophy.

House churches are worse for me. It's the personal interaction that I avoid. That's easier in a big church. But big building churches aren't easy for me either.

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by coadie

What is a chemical embalance? It is not a formal clinical diagnosis

What is a negative spiral?

It is difficult to have inteligent discussion when people use slang and vague expressions.

Renda said it once. People need to set boundaries. If they cuss at you or inflict trauma, draw the line. Spell it out.

At what point does the pastor need to be told that key click software is illegal. He can ask for it, but can't have it.

My personal opinion is these cases are not only rare, but the more people exagerate them, the more pitty they get in return.

In my memory, I don't have knowledge of "chemical embalances" as a disease that is contageous.

Nope - - wrong answer.

What is a Chemical Imbalance?
We’ve heard a lot about “chemical imbalance” as the cause of emotional distress and disturbances. Researchers have spent decades trying to get to the bottom of what causes common disorders such as anxiety, depression and ADHD, and they believe that some form of chemical imbalance is involved in some way. While the exact link between chemical imbalance and emotional disorders has not been found, clinical studies and medical observations have been able to identify a number of chemical inconsistencies that occur in individuals who report experiencing symptoms related to these disorders.

http://www.anxiety-and-depression-so..._imbalance.php

Common chemical imbalances related to emotional disorders such as anxiety and depression include:

■Reduced availability of neurotransmitters like Serotonin, Dopamine, Norepinephrine, GABA and Acetylcholine.
■Increased levels of toxic neurochemicals such as Homocysteine
■Lower levels of serum Magnesium, Zinc or Potassium
■Unhealthy, or deficient levels of essential vitamins like B6, B9, B12 and Vitamin-C
■Undersupply of key cofactors like amino acids that are used to help transport neurotransmitter precursors into the blood-brain barrier.
■Increased cortisol stress hormone levels

[Aquila]

Originally Posted by nahkoe

House churches are worse for me. It's the personal interaction that I avoid. That's easier in a big church. But big building churches aren't easy for me either.

My heart goes out to you Nahkoe. For me, I've found that the smaller groups are far better. I begin to have serious anxiety before and after church services in traditional church settings. I'll start shaking when the preacher begins "screaming"... even if he's screaming about something good or worth screaming about. It leaves me deeply disturbed and shaken. Those who know me have voiced how I "change" when I've been going to church. I'm very irritable, and can become verbally abusive. They say I get "mean". lol

[coadie]

Originally Posted by Aquila

Having come from an ultra conservative church, I can see your point.

I'm astounded with how a given church can be a real fit for some and completely destroy others.

a church doesn't destroy anybody. There can be jerks and toxic relationships.

That Bishop in atlanta can destroy a church. The church can't destroy the boys. The Eddie Long can damage the boys and God can restore them.

I will comment on women. Within women as a group, more of them are "pleasers" and are miserable when they are not working themselves to please others. Mother Theresa was a pleaser to the point of suffering.

[Aquila]

I Googled "spiritual abuse" (scary huh? lol). Here's a list of indicators of spiritual abuse that I found.

Thoughts?

Apotheosis of the leadership — exalting them to God-like status in and over the group;

Multi-level authority/government hierarchy;

Absolute authority of the leadership;

No real accountability of the leadership to the corporate body;

Hand-picked sub-leaders, based on their demonstration of submissiveness to the ultimate leader rather than on the basis of their leadership skills, spirituality, and anointing and appointment by God;

Pervasive abuse and misuse of authority in personal dealings with members;
Paranoia and insecurity by the leaders;

Abuse, misuse, and inordinate incidence of "church discipline;"

Personal materialism, covetousness, and self-aggrandizement by the leaders;

Members and/or sub-leaders must make a "spiritual covenant," sometimes a signed covenant agreement, pledging their total commitment and financial support to the leadership and church/ministry;

Partitioning of the group into smaller groups that are led by internally "raised up" lay-leaders who have not been anointed or appointed by God for leadership within the church;

Financial exploitation and enslavement of the members;

Inordinate attention to maintaining the public "image" of the ministry;

Doctrinal demeanment and devaluation — the requisite of espousing and teaching "sound doctrine" is demeaned and devalued;

Theological incompetency by the leadership, especially with respect to the rules of hermeneutics and Bible exegesis employed in the formulation of doctrine, giving license to twisting and adulteration of Scripture in order to provide proof-texts for unorthodox and invented doctrines;

Spiritualism, mysticism, and unproven doctrines;

Abuse and misuse of prophetic giftings as a means to dominate and intimidate;

Devaluation, disallowance, disregard, and displacement of the true Fivefold Ministry within the church;

De facto legalism, or works mentality, and its resulting loss of the "joy of salvation," though "freedom" is forever preached from the pulpit and the church is constantly touted as being a "safe church" by the leadership;

Esotericism — hidden agendas and requirements revealed to members only as they successfully advance through various stages of "spiritual enlightenment," i.e., unorthodox, unproven indigenous doctrines;

Isolationism — corporate and individual, especially with respect to exposure to outside ministry sources;

Performance-based approval and promotion system of mem
bers predicated on "proven" "loyalty" (i.e., submission) to the leadership;

Devaluation, suppression, and non-recognition of members' bona fide God-given talents, abilities, gifts, callings, and anointing, as a means of subjugation;

Requiring members to perform menial tasks, such as cleaning toilets, setting up chairs, and acting as the leader's personal valet or slave, as a supposed means to humble them and teach them to "obey their leaders;"

Constant indoctrination with a "group" or "family" mentality that impels members to exalt the corporate "life" and goals of the church-group over their personal goals, callings, and objectives;

Members are psychologically traumatized and indoctrinated with numerous improper fears and phobias aimed at keeping them reeling in diffidence and an over-dependence or co-dependence on their leaders and the corporate group;

Corporately, there eventually develops an inordinately high incidence of financial, marital, moral, psychological, mental, emotional, and medical problems, including sudden deaths and contraction of "incurable" and "unknown" diseases;

Lack of true personal spiritual growth and development, especially in terms of genuine faith and experiencing the abounding grace, forgiveness, goodness, blessings, kindness, and agape-love of God;

Members are required to obtain the approval or "witness" of their leader(s) for decisions regarding personal matters;

Frequent preaching from the pulpit regarding not getting out from under the "spiritual covering" of the leadership;

Members departing without the prior permission and blessing of the leadership leave the group under a cloud of manufactured suspicion, shame, and slander;

Horror stories frequently told by leaders about individuals or families who left the group without the prior permission and blessing of the leadership, and the terrible consequences and curses they suffered as a result;

Departing members often suffer from various psychological problems and display the classic symptoms associated with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

Interestingly, the church in question in this discussion appears to have all the issues listed above.

[Aquila]

Originally Posted by coadie

a church doesn't destroy anybody. There can be jerks and toxic relationships.

That Bishop in atlanta can destroy a church. The church can't destroy the boys. The Eddie Long can damage the boys and God can restore them.

I will comment on women. Within women as a group, more of them are "pleasers" and are miserable when they are not working themselves to please others. Mother Theresa was a pleaser to the point of suffering.

Depends on one's definition of church.

[Praxeas]

Originally Posted by Aquila

Having come from an ultra conservative church, I can see your point.

I'm astounded with how a given church can be a real fit for some and completely destroy others.

It's only a "fit" for others up to a point. Cross some line and you might be branded for life, then other saints start looking down on you and you'll be pretty depressed when you think "I hate this church, but if I go anywhere else Im going to hell".

So you get people that look like they are fitting in but in reality they are depressed.

Case in point, I know of a woman that went to one of those churches and "fit" for a long long time. But then something happened. She felt she could not go to that church because of the Pastor. But she had been spoon fed hate for other churches for so long that she could not bring herself to go to other churches like hers but not as strict. She was taught it was better to backslide than go to "that church"...and she was fine until the incident.

[Praxeas]

Originally Posted by coadie

a church doesn't destroy anybody. There can be jerks and toxic relationships.

That Bishop in atlanta can destroy a church. The church can't destroy the boys. The Eddie Long can damage the boys and God can restore them.

I will comment on women. Within women as a group, more of them are "pleasers" and are miserable when they are not working themselves to please others. Mother Theresa was a pleaser to the point of suffering.

A church, local church and leadership have infact ruined lives.

[ILG]

Originally Posted by Aquila

Can church be bad for your health?

Someone I know has talked to a counselor about various issues and feelings they’ve been facing. The counselor found it interesting how their entire life revolved around “church” and how much of their present anxiety comes from how they feel when they attend church, though they’ve recently stopped attending regularly. The counselor decided to delve deeper into their experience with church for a few secessions. Many of the situations that they experienced in church were rather traumatic emotionally, including the loss of their marriage. The individual feels very troubled, stressed, and deeply depressed after “attending church”. Negative and hurtful thoughts and memories flood the mind when they walk through the doors. Normally after returning home they experience a deep valley of depression for a few days that frightens them. If they continue attending church they become militantly “dedicated” to the point of outbursts, anger, and unreasonableness. Eventually it snaps and they fall apart emotionally. Even when attending another church where nothing negative has happened the individual finds themselves almost in a cold sweat and feeling nearly frantic. Friends and family have pointed out that when they had been attending church in the recent two years they had become cold, unemotional, and heartless. The counselor stated that they have symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder originating from the emotional abuse, or perceived emotional abuse, that they received in church. I pulled this from a website to see if this was possible. Here is a paragraph illustrated the causes of PTSD:

What causes PTSD?
Virtually any trauma, defined as an event that is life-threatening or that severely compromises the emotional well-being of an individual or causes intense fear, may cause PTSD. Such events often include either experiencing or witnessing a severe accident or physical injury, receiving a life-threatening medical diagnosis, being the victim of kidnapping or torture, exposure to war combat or to a natural disaster, exposure to other disaster (for example, plane crash) or terrorist attack, being the victim of rape, mugging, robbery, or assault, enduring physical, sexual, emotional, or other forms of abuse, as well as involvement in civil conflict. Although the diagnosis of PTSD currently requires that the sufferer has a history of experiencing a traumatic event as defined here, people may develop PTSD in reaction to events that may not qualify as traumatic but can be devastating life events like divorce or unemployment.

It was the counselor’s opinion that after years of being in a church wherein the individual’s performance was always judged so strictly, fearsome rebukes from the pulpit issued, and unreasonable demands and accusations from leadership they person faces deep emotional trauma. Their marriage fell apart while trying to appease the church and meet unreasonable standards, schedules, and obedience. This too contributes to the emotional pain they experience in regards to discussing “church” or attending “church”. The counselor has encouraged a therapy involving rapid eye movements and has advised that the individual approach “attending church” with caution. Prescribing medication is the last resort according to these counselor, the hopes are that the individual in question can overcome their deep emotional trauma through therapeutic means not involving drugs. The counselor has also encouraged the person to find a way to maintain and practice their spirituality in alternative faith communities if they feel they must remain spiritual.

Is it possible that negative experiences with church over an extended period of time can result in PTSD or deep emotional trauma? Is it possible that after such experiences “traditional church” could be bad for the mental and emotional health of some individuals?

I can only speak for myself. I believe I had a bad case of PTSD caused by church that I have been healing from. I am not completely recovered. I remember when a leaf would blow across the street in front of my car, I would practically jump out of my skin. I can still do that sometimes, although not nearly as often and not usually as severe.

There are things I miss about church, but, mostly it's been much better than being in.

[ILG]

BTW, I would like to be able to trust a counselor enough to bring me to some sort of healing, but, chances are, I'll stay away from them too. I don't trust any "authority" who tells me they are going to help me.