Do you really know how to grow churches?

[Falla39]

Originally Posted by Felicity

Thanks for completing the scripture for me sis.

You are welcome! My late dad was so insistant that we learn

to quote scripture correctly that once when a visitor came with

my sister in law to church, heard me quietly quoting along with

my dad, asked my SIL if I helped prepare Bro. B's sermons. She

thought I knew the scriptures because I had helped him with his

sermon. If she had only known the years Dad had invested in

sowing the seed of the Word of God into our young hearts, in the

home (family alter) and from the pulpit!! I thank God for that today.

Dad has been gone for a long time but the seed sown has germinated

and now comes out of my mouth, sowing to my own children and

grandchildren!! Just keeps on reproducing! The Word of God is quick

and powerful and is energetic!!!

Blessings,

Falla39

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Falla39

You are welcome! My late dad was so insistant that we learn

to quote scripture correctly that once when a visitor came with

my sister in law to church, heard me quietly quoting along with

my dad, asked my SIL if I helped prepare Bro. B's sermons. She

thought I knew the scriptures because I had helped him with his

sermon. If she had only known the years Dad had invested in

sowing the seed of the Word of God into our young hearts, in the

home (family alter) and from the pulpit!! I thank God for that today.

Dad has been gone for a long time but the seed sown has germinated

and now comes out of my mouth, sowing to my own children and

grandchildren!! Just keeps on reproducing! The Word of God is quick

and powerful and is energetic!!!

Blessings,

Falla39

Sis. Falla,

You have a very rich inheritance from your parents...your family I have met are proof of that. I am like you...I loved the word and was on Bible Quiz teams from 12-17. If I had to choose between good music in the church or good teaching/preaching...I'd rather have the word.

Bro. A.D. Spears, back in the 70's, could preach for hours and it seemed but minutes...I hang on to every word the Preacher says...If I can't be fed then there is no use sitting at the table!

Blessings, Rhoni

[Falla39]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Sis. Falla,

You have a very rich inheritance from your parents...your family I have met are proof of that. I am like you...I loved the word and was on Bible Quiz teams from 12-17. If I had to choose between good music in the church or good teaching/preaching...I'd rather have the word.

Bro. A.D. Spears, back in the 70's, could preach for hours and it seemed but minutes...I hang on to every word the Preacher says...If I can't be fed then there is no use sitting at the table!

Blessings, Rhoni

Yes, Sis. Rhoni,

I am so grateful for my heritage! It means more to me today

than ever before!

Did you go to Bro. A.D. Spears church! In Kilgore or Longview!

Yes, we were very priviledged to have been taught God's Word.

Blessings,

Falla39

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Falla39

Yes, Sis. Rhoni,

I am so grateful for my heritage! It means more to me today

than ever before!

Did you go to Bro. A.D. Spears church! In Kilgore or Longview!

Yes, we were very priviledged to have been taught God's Word.

Blessings,

Falla39

Sis. Falla,

When I heard Bro. Spears he was evangelizing and holding a revival in Jackson, Mississippi for Bro. Craft. It was my first month [yes - revivals lasted a long time back in the day] of Bible College. I was 17 years old, first time away from home, and very disillusioned with the things I saw going on around me at JCM. My expectations were high for my Bible College experience. I was expecting OHIO BUCKEYE Lake campmeeting 24/7. What I got was similar to my Public High School experience: sex, drugs, cheating, and discrimination.

But Bro. Spears put it all into perspective for me and I grew up a lot at JCM. I realized I had to live for God for myself. I had to cultivate a prayer life of my own and not depend on that of my Prayer Warrior mother. I realized that I was not so outgoing, a bit scared, and more than a little insecure. Not altogether sure where it all came from. I was so secure in my own world in Ohio...but had to learn to find security in God where ever and whom ever I am.

Building churches takes a lot of work and giftedness. I learned though that this was not enough. All the talent and education you may possess is not enough without the blessing and anointing of God. Martha's works, without Mary's relationship cannot a church make. Martha and Mary together can bring in a great harvest.

Love & Blessings, Rhoni

[Falla39]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Sis. Falla,

When I heard Bro. Spears he was evangelizing and holding a revival in Jackson, Mississippi for Bro. Craft. It was my first month [yes - revivals lasted a long time back in the day] of Bible College. I was 17 years old, first time away from home, and very disillusioned with the things I saw going on around me at JCM. My expectations were high for my Bible College experience. I was expecting OHIO BUCKEYE Lake campmeeting 24/7. What I got was similar to my Public High School experience: sex, drugs, cheating, and discrimination.

But Bro. Spears put it all into perspective for me and I grew up a lot at JCM. I realized I had to live for God for myself. I had to cultivate a prayer life of my own and not depend on that of my Prayer Warrior mother. I realized that I was not so outgoing, a bit scared, and more than a little insecure. Not altogether sure where it all came from. I was so secure in my own world in Ohio...but had to learn to find security in God where ever and whom ever I am.

Building churches takes a lot of work and giftedness. I learned though that this was not enough. All the talent and education you may possess is not enough without the blessing and anointing of God. Martha's works, without Mary's relationship cannot a church make. Martha and Mary together can bring in a great harvest.

Love & Blessings, Rhoni

Sis. Rhoni,

Very true!! I recall Sis. Felicity's quoting a verse in Ps. 127 yesterday

and it is so true, "Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain

that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but

in vain". We must have Him in everything we do, if we are to be successful.

Whether it is a family, a church, a business, or organization, etc., we must

have Him! Without Him, we are nothing, and cannot do anything worth

doing! You mentioned co-dependency in another post! I think we are

connected and dependent upon HIM, wouldn't you say?

Lord, I depend on You;
Lord. I depend on You,
Like a child reaching out
to his father and mother.
Lord, I depend on You!

Expound on that a bit, Sis. Rhoni. Co-dependency!

I am going to the doctor with my little sister for a checkup so

won't be on for a while!

Blessings,

Falla39

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Falla39

Sis. Rhoni,

Very true!! I recall Sis. Felicity's quoting a verse in Ps. 127 yesterday

and it is so true, "Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain

that build it: except the LORD keep the city, the watchman waketh but

in vain". We must have Him in everything we do, if we are to be successful.

Whether it is a family, a church, a business, or organization, etc., we must

have Him! Without Him, we are nothing, and cannot do anything worth

doing! You mentioned co-dependency in another post! I think we are

connected and dependent upon HIM, wouldn't you say?

Lord, I depend on You;
Lord. I depend on You,
Like a child reaching out
to his father and mother.
Lord, I depend on You!

Expound on that a bit, Sis. Rhoni. Co-dependency!

I am going to the doctor with my little sister for a checkup so

won't be on for a while!

Blessings,

Falla39

I will take this to the Dear Rhoni thread as a question....

Blessings, Rhoni

P.S. Co-dependency is different than dependency...and YES...we are all dependent on God.

[Rhoni]

Here are some things that may help you to understand the nature of co-dependency:

Co-Dependency Characteristics:
The primary identifying factor of co-dependency is the fact that the person/individual tends to take care of everyone around them in regards to; feelings, actions, words, everything to the neglect of themselves. The person who is co-dependent is a reactive individual who neglects to take action for him/her self.

The co-dependent person is characterized by having a dysfunctional relationship with others as well as themselves. They tend to live through others instead of for him or herself. Many times they are controlling and will blame others instead of taking responsibility for themselves and live in a state of 'Victimization' while trying to fix others. They generally will exhibit intense anxiety when it comes to intimacy issues.

*always having to take care of others at the expense of your own self
*Unable to trust your own feelings
*depression
*isolation
*Workaholism
*perfectionism
*no clear boundaries
*low self-esteem - seeks the approval in others

[Rhoni]

People with a co-dependent personality are often considered rescuers and are constantly trying to save people from the consequences of their behaviors. This enables the person they are trying to rescue to stay dependent on them for their well-being. They will go to great lengths to do this; giving money, lying for them, and defending them when it would be better to stay out of the middle of this person's problems. The actions/behaviors of the co-dependent person are many times well founded but executed in the wrong way. The co-dependent person needs to learn that the only one who's behaviors they can control are their own. Once the co-dependent person realizes this then they will be able to help the dysfunctional people in their lives start to take responsibility for their own actions.

[Rhoni]

Recovery for a Co-Dependent Person:

The prime objective to recovery in healing is to learn to take care of one's self and not worry about how others are going to get along. The thing that has to happen is that the co-dependent person needs to get in touch with their own feelings and actions and learn to DETACH from involvement in other people's affairs.

Detachment means using energy for yourself insted of using it on others and neglecting yourself. Understanding your own boundaries and making others do the same in regards to you is very important to the healing process of the co-dependent.

Giving your love, energy, emotions and person to a dysfunctional person is draining and can have a long-lasting effect on your life long after the individual is gone. Part of the healing process is to let go of the pain and then learn how to make your life happy again.

Blessings, Rhoni

[Rhoni]

Sister Falla,

Where it would be questioned about the line between caring for others and being narcississtic would be when the caring for others is not about the others but the need for you to take care of someone else's business to the neglect of taking care of your own. A good evidence of this is found in the Bible when using the analogy of: one trying to judge another without first taking the beam out of his own eye.

Another way to check yourself is when the person you are trying to rescue or defend has little reason to be connected to you. I think many use the term 'friend' or 'relative' loosely. I have clients who tell me...this or that one is an aunt, uncle, brother, or sister only to find out...they are not related at all.

Using myself as an example: my co-dependent behavior is a product of being in an alcoholic family. I was the oldest of five children, I parented and was my Mom's best friend even though she was the parent. My father was an alcoholic and I was the family hero...always rescuing and trying to divert the attention from the dysfunction in our home. Trying to take care of everyone else's feelings, excuse their behavior and blame it on circumstance, and trying really hard not to focus on my own issues.

Like most good co-dependents...I refused to believe I had a problem. I had to join a group meeting for a counsleing project and chose ALANON. I was in my 40's so I didn't think I needed it, had gotten past all my issues...and in the first session within the first 5 minutes...I was exposed!

I still fight battles with co-dependency, but through the past few years have gotten better at the boundary thing and not accepting other people's problems as my own and worry over them or with them. Even writing all this down..I have seen how I contribute to the issues in regards to my son's wedding. Co-dependency has a way of creeping back into your life - just when you thought you had it whipped!

Hope this helps.

Blessings, Rhoni