Do you believe the innocent party in a situation - Page 4

*AQuietPlace* · #31 05-13-2009, 02:19 PM

In my opinion, there's no excuse for cheating. Period.

Not defrauding one another is plain ol' common sense, because doing so is going to make everything harder. Including resisting temptation. But it still doesn't excuse it.

If someone commits adultery, they are at fault for committing adultery. Period. If the wife is a shrew, or the husband a jerk... they are at fault for being a shrew or a jerk. But they're not at fault for adultery. Adultery is an individual's choice, and it's always wrong. It's sin.

Rhoni · #32 05-13-2009, 02:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rgcraig

Is depriving a sin?

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pressing-On

The scripture seems to imply that sin will rear it's head for the person deprived. It seems that the "depriver" had their hand in the fall of the "deprived".

Quote:

Originally Posted by blueeyes

Being deprived is not always the case for adultery, there are great people who have given their all in marriages and yet you still find spouses cheating.Faithfullness is a matter of the the heart of each individual person and God.Tho two are united in marriage each person is responsible for their own salvation and committement to God and to their spouse.We can't control things people do, we can however control our reaction to it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pressing-On

I agree with you. But to begin the discussion, I think it would be good to pull out all scripture references and work from there.

I know a good many women who have spoken to me trying to complain only to find out it was their fault - depriving - for reasons such as - too tired, too busy, etc. Excuses they need to work on and not point the finger at the man. Just sayin'.....

But, again, I do agree on your point that we are all responsible for our own decisions and actions.

It is a very complicated issue at best. For my beginning contribution to this thread, I simply wanted to point out I Cor 7:5 for discussion.

Although it is a sin to defraud one another sexually, it is not the only cause for marital discord. Many times other needs are not getting met, emotional, psychological, and someone spoke about the issue of respect.

Betrayal is more than a sexual affair. When a husband does not protect his wife/shield her from verbal attacks from others, or does not stand up and be the head or decision maker that God intended then it puts the wife in a precarious situation to lose respect for him as he has not respected her.

Even though, many would like to think there is a truly innocent spouse - I still hold to the conviction that this is not so, but I was not an innocent party

Blessings, Rhoni

Rhoni · #33 05-13-2009, 02:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

In my opinion, there's no excuse for cheating. Period.

Not defrauding one another is plain ol' common sense, because doing so is going to make everything harder. Including resisting temptation. But it still doesn't excuse it.

If someone commits adultery, they are at fault for committing adultery. Period. If the wife is a shrew, or the husband a jerk... they are at fault for being a shrew or a jerk. But they're not at fault for adultery. Adultery is an individual's choice, and it's always wrong. It's sin.

Easy thing for someone never faced with it to say. There are many ways to 'betray' or commit adultery. Just thinking about it makes one guilty. How would you ever know?

Pressing-On · #34 05-13-2009, 02:25 PM

Outside of our emotional opinions on adultery - would someone care to look at I Cor 7:5 and give your interpretation of that scripture? TIA!

rgcraig · #35 05-13-2009, 02:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pressing-On

How do you really know that the pretty woman gave him everything he wanted? How can we know that and would she actually be honest about it?

I'm leaving the men with men thing alone - YUCK!!! LOL! Again, I'm trying to focus on this particular scripture reference.

I'm coming from the angle, after talking to a lot of women, that it appears to be their fault. At least the ones that have complained to me. They want to complain about him and his needs BUT after listening for a while, I find out it is their fault and they are trying to put the blame on him.

Of course, we can go into how a man makes you feel like an object and is a total turn off, but that isn't what I'm discussing here.

You are right, Abigail - It is NOT always the reason someone cheats and I have never said that is was, but let's focus on the scripture, okay?

IMO, it appears that if we do "deprive" another we are opening up that person to be tempted by Satan. Is that a sin on the "depriver's" part? That is the question. Let's focus on that.

The scripture bears out that either party WILL be tempted by Satan if they are deprived. That means that God knows, even with a decision, it can happen. OR does the scripture, without actually saying, only focus on the weaker person being deprived as the one tempted? Is the one committing the adultery the only one to blame or is the "depriver" also to blame? IMO, the scripture appears to be pointing at the "depriver" as being party and part to the sin.

You feel that strongly about that scripture? I think it points out that IT COULD happen, but not that it WILL happen. It's a warning.

I also think if we are talking about depriving being a fault of the marriage that we should discuss the reasons of why there might be depriving. Not fair to talk about one without the other.

Rhoni · #36 05-13-2009, 02:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rgcraig

You feel that strongly about that scripture? I think it points out that IT COULD happen, but not that it WILL happen. It's a warning.

I also think if we are talking about depriving being a fault of the marriage that we should discuss the reasons of why there might be depriving. Not fair to talk about one without the other.

I agree! Could be that one is not focused on pleasing the other.

*AQuietPlace* · #37 05-13-2009, 02:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Easy thing for someone never faced with it to say. There are many ways to 'betray' or commit adultery. Just thinking about it makes one guilty. How would you ever know?

How do you know I've never been faced with it?

*AQuietPlace* · #38 05-13-2009, 02:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pressing-On

Outside of our emotional opinions on adultery - would someone care to look at I Cor 7:5 and give your interpretation of that scripture? TIA!

1 Corinthians 7:5 (King James Version)

5Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

Common sense. Don't defraud one another because doing so opens you up to being more vulnerable to temptation. I'm not sure what else there is to say about it.

rgcraig · #39 05-13-2009, 02:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

How do you know I've never been faced with it?

I was going to ask that too - lol.....

rgcraig · #40 05-13-2009, 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

1 Corinthians 7:5 (King James Version)

5Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

Common sense. Don't defraud one another because doing so opens you up to being more vulnerable to temptation. I'm not sure what else there is to say about it.

That's the way I see it - - a warning of what could happen, so don't do it. I don't read that if you do it's a sin either.