How close should a pastor get to the members?

[2020Vision]

Originally Posted by Praxeas

Im not reacting like you are attacking me personally. Im reacting to what you say because you post it as though it is something I said or did not say or disagreed with and I want to repeat and make sure that in asserting something like Pastoral authority in response to my post, that I did not say anything questioning Pastoral authority.

See if you quote me or anyone else, then say something to that affect, the implication can be that the person you are quoting somewhere in his post or prior made such a statement.

You suggested I was an anarchist earlier. I never posted one thing remotely LIKE anarchism. I never denied church government or leadership. Im clarifying what I said. You posted something to the effect that "saints don't need to know all the dirt on the pastor"...to me...to my post...that suggests that somewhere along the way I said something like that and I did not.

I never suggested you were an anarchist anywhere.
Talking about "dirt" was related to the implications of the Pastor being your buddy. These examples are just tied into the whole issue. You mess with one piece and it has implications elsewhere. I'm not saying YOU personally are saying them, I guess you are seeing that I am saying your position can potentially imply such things, and it's dangerous, which is supporting my position of why I don't think a Pastor should get entangled with the saints. Be the shepherd, as we all follow the Great Shepherd.

No ill feelings. Not trying to play a public chess match of wits with you. Promise!

[Praxeas]

Originally Posted by 2020Vision

Bible gives some pretty broad authority. But let's not go on a tangent. Pastor doesn't forgive your sins. Pastor doesn't tell you what to eat for breakfast. We know that.

You've gotten my opinion on the "should" matter. I shouldn't be calling my pastor "dude". Gives you an idea.

LOL...well unless the Pastor is a former surfer and calls me dude, I probably would not call him dude either

[2020Vision]

Originally Posted by rgcraig

My dad was a good business man, well respected in the community, well respected in the church. All my life my dad was close to the pastors in our church - never by his design.

A good pastor recognizes who he can lean on, depend on and confide in. They were friends. Did it ever hurt the pastor/saint relationship that they were close.....never.

I think it's wrong to say that a pastor should NEVER get close to their members. You use wisdom.....

I was forunate to grow up in a church that functioned healthy.........made for a strong pastor/membership relationship too.

We aren't building rules. We are just answering the question of the post. Making friends among your flock is not wise. Not sure what your dad's relationship was. I'm close to my pastor, but I don't treat him like I do everyone else. I guess, to me, it was sounding like Prax was saying since the Pastor is human like all of us, there should be no differentiation in our relationship. Maybe I'm wrong.... That's what I was getting out of it.

[2020Vision]

Originally Posted by 2020Vision

We aren't building rules. We are just answering the question of the post. Making friends among your flock is not wise. Not sure what your dad's relationship was. I'm close to my pastor, but I don't treat him like I do everyone else. I guess, to me, it was sounding like Prax was saying since the Pastor is human like all of us, there should be no differentiation in our relationship. Maybe I'm wrong.... That's what I was getting out of it.

Enjoyed the post and discussion. Have a great night!

[Praxeas]

Before my Pastor was the pastor I used to refer to him by his first name. I did that often with many saints. I never liked the "Brother Sister" thing...I still don't. But because within our group it has become a law unto itself dictating what is respect or not, I try to use those titles more often. But personally my friends I would rather they call me by my name. It seems to me more personal.

I would definitely not call him dude or Pastor dude though

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by 2020Vision

We aren't building rules. We are just answering the question of the post. Making friends among your flock is not wise. Not sure what your dad's relationship was. I'm close to my pastor, but I don't treat him like I do everyone else. I guess, to me, it was sounding like Prax was saying since the Pastor is human like all of us, there should be no differentiation in our relationship. Maybe I'm wrong.... That's what I was getting out of it.

We are discussing the question.

You have one opinion - I have another. That' what a discussion is about.
As you said, we aren't building rules.

Just because you said "making friends among your flock is not wise" does not mean that's the answer.

[ManOfWord]

Originally Posted by 2020Vision

Bible gives some pretty broad authority. But let's not go on a tangent. Pastor doesn't forgive your sins. Pastor doesn't tell you what to eat for breakfast. We know that.

You've gotten my opinion on the "should" matter. I shouldn't be calling my pastor "dude". Gives you an idea.

As a Sr. Pastor for 20+ yrs, I could care less if someone in the church I pastor calls me "dude." I don't need someone to use my title or position to display their respect for me. I have the respect of many @ NLC and most call me by my first name or Pastor or Pastor John. Sometimes Pastor Adams. However, I hate the term Reverend! I hate special seating no matter where I go. I want to be with the sheep. That is where the "action" is! That is where ministry takes place.

I can't believe some are thinking that anything on this thread is an attack on pastors. It is a discussion....sometimes a spirited discussion. Nothing wrong with that. I think the separation between pastors and saints is one of the worst philosophies that has slithered into Jesus' bride. He NEVER acted that way nor did He ever warn leaders to keep their distance from the sheep. It just isn't in the Bible!!

[2020Vision]

Originally Posted by Praxeas

Before my Pastor was the pastor I used to refer to him by his first name. I did that often with many saints. I never liked the "Brother Sister" thing...I still don't. But because within our group it has become a law unto itself dictating what is respect or not, I try to use those titles more often. But personally my friends I would rather they call me by my name. It seems to me more personal.

I would definitely not call him dude or Pastor dude though

As much as we didn't want this to be personal, you do have a unique situation. Your friend became your pastor. How fun.
The pastor will naturally be closer to some over others, and has that right. It just can make things complex. Personally, I'd avoid it. More power to you if you want to try it out. I think lots of people have said they got burned. It's too bad. Unfortunate.

[2020Vision]

Originally Posted by rgcraig

We are discussing the question.

You have one opinion - I have another. That' what a discussion is about.
As you said, we aren't building rules.

Just because you said "making friends among your flock is not wise" does not mean that's the answer.

Okay...

[2020Vision]

Originally Posted by ManOfWord

As a Sr. Pastor for 20+ yrs, I could care less if someone in the church I pastor calls me "dude." I don't need someone to use my title or position to display their respect for me. I have the respect of many @ NLC and most call me by my first name or Pastor or Pastor John. Sometimes Pastor Adams. However, I hate the term Reverend! I hate special seating no matter where I go. I want to be with the sheep. That is where the "action" is! That is where ministry takes place.

I can't believe some are thinking that anything on this thread is an attack on pastors. It is a discussion....sometimes a spirited discussion. Nothing wrong with that. I think the separation between pastors and saints is one of the worst philosophies that has slithered into Jesus' bride. He NEVER acted that way nor did He ever warn leaders to keep their distance from the sheep. It just isn't in the Bible!!

And I think your wrong