Naww...not until my dear husband is ready to go through it with me. I just hope he will reach that point eventually, and doesn't take too long.
I will be praying for you...that God gives you wisdom and strength for this leg of the journey. This will be a good time to study, research and learn...There will be some things that you will hold to, find out during this time what they are...There will also be things that you will let go of, find out during this time what they are and how you will deal with it...Remember the Lord is directing your life, and you want your husband to be along for the journey, no matter where it takes you...Hugs and prayers!
__________________
"Just a sinner saved by grace!"
I will be praying for you...that God gives you wisdom and strength for this leg of the journey. This will be a good time to study, research and learn...There will be some things that you will hold to, find out during this time what they are...There will also be things that you will let go of, find out during this time what they are and how you will deal with it...Remember the Lord is directing your life, and you want your husband to be along for the journey, no matter where it takes you...Hugs and prayers!
Thank you for the reminder and the prayers!
__________________
"If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there."
Many many many people have never really delved into the scriptures for themselves, but have trusted others, primarily preachers, to study what should be believed FOR them. They put blind faith in such leaders. This is of course necessary for the first while when a person is first saved. We were heathens when first saved. We had no clue about anything in the bible.
However, ministers are also meant to bring the people to the place where the people can begin to study the scriptures for themselves as well. Leadership is always required, but each person really has to come to know what is truth for themselves in the long ruin.
I said all that to say this. Maybe your husband has never stepped away from actually seeing for himself whether these issues are indeed biblical or not. At some point in time every believer needs to come to the BEREAN sort of situation where they search the scriptures for themselves and realize God wants us to personally know why we believe what we believe. Some Pastors are scared of this. They want the saints to blindly follow them.
I heard the old "lie", to put it plainly, that sometimes the situation is like a person on the ground who represents the pastor, and the saint is in a tree. The saint is amidst branches and leaves and cannot see that there is a snake just up ahead a couple of branches away. The pastor on the ground hollers up to the saint and says, "Do not go there!!"
The point is if the person did not jump when the preacher said jump, the snake would have bitten him. If the saint took time to want something explained and proved to them before they acted, they would have been bitten and died. They claim this shows that saints must simply do what the pastor says without asking why.
I say Phooey.
The Bereans were the type of people who heard preaching and CHECKED THE SCRIPTURES FOR THEMSELVES to see if what was preached was correct or not.
Act 17:11 These were more noble than those in Thessalonica, in that they received the word with all readiness of mind, and searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so.
The Bereans were not the sort of people who just took whatever they were told, nor just rejected something they never heard before. And the bible called them NOBLE. They actually checked the scriptures whether it was taught to them before or not. This goes the other way around, too. They did not just swallow whatever they were handed. They had the realization that if God wanted them to know something they should be able to see it for themselves in scripture.
So many saints have even told me that they cannot understand the bible in many areas. I said that did not mean God does not want them to be able to learn for themselves though. I am to help them honestly and reasonably be able to study the bible as a pastor. Too many think that is the pastor's job and not their own.
We owe it to ourselves to know the truth!
Somehow this fear of not digging into the bible, itself, may be plaguing your husband. It sounds like he simply does not think he can read the scriptures and see for himself what the bible is actually saying. And he has a fear of going into error. God's Word says that if we pray anything according to His will, we have the petitions we ask! In other words, God will especially answer your prayers to know the real truth of certain scriptures that some claim means no uncut hair on women. If uncut hair is the truth, then God will confirm that when you study. If not, then He will not. The point is DO NOT BE AFRAID TO STUDY THE BIBLE FOR YOURSELVES.
But do not get into it thinking God will show you one thing, and show someone else something else. There is only ONE TRUTH for each issue. And GOD WANTS US TO KNOW IT.
Those often set on old paths never have actually studied it for themselves. And they are actually afraid to, since they've been drilled about how anyone who disagrees is lost! God wants everyone to know the truth and the bible is not just for preachers to study.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mirth1981
I'm seriously dreading it.
My husband is very set on the old paths. He told me tonight "Just do what you want, but I don't agree." It breaks my heart.
I don't understand. Why would the Lord show me something just so that it could make my life miserable and cause problems in my marriage? But I see things so clearly now.
I don't believe that the holiness standards are biblical. I don't agree with how people are treated in UPC churches when they don't follow them. I don't like the control and fear tactics that I see. I believe that we are basing our salvation on our works when we enforce such standards. No, I don't believe this is right.
Are these reasons enough to leave my current church? I don't know...and I don't want to move forward in any way without my husband, but he is digging his heels in and refusing to budge.
I'm trying so hard to be patient, but I don't know if I can do this.
__________________ ...MY THOUGHTS, ANYWAY.
"Many Christians do not try to understand what was written in a verse in the Bible. Instead they approach the passage to prove what they already believe."
Many many many people have never really delved into the scriptures for themselves, but have trusted others, primarily preachers, to study what should be believed FOR them.
I have numerous friends who have told me - 'I'm just not a questioner'. It scares them to question. They get very antsy and nervous if you question anything.
I guess it's easier living that way. But you'd sure better hope you're being told the truth! Because you won't know it if you're not.
Many many many people have never really delved into the scriptures for themselves, but have trusted others, primarily preachers, to study what should be believed FOR them. They put blind faith in such leaders. This is of course necessary for the first while when a person is first saved. We were heathens when first saved. We had no clue about anything in the bible.
However, ministers are also meant to bring the people to the place where the people can begin to study the scriptures for themselves as well. Leadership is always required, but each person really has to come to know what is truth for themselves in the long ruin.
I said all that to say this. Maybe your husband has never stepped away from actually seeing for himself whether these issues are indeed biblical or not. At some point in time every believer needs to come to the BEREAN sort of situation where they search the scriptures for themselves and realize God wants us to personally know why we believe what we believe. Some Pastors are scared of this. They want the saints to blindly follow them.
I heard the old "lie", to put it plainly, that sometimes the situation is like a person on the ground who represents the pastor, and the saint is in a tree. The saint is amidst branches and leaves and cannot see that there is a snake just up ahead a couple of branches away. The pastor on the ground hollers up to the saint and says, "Do not go there!!"
The point is if the person did not jump when the preacher said jump, the snake would have bitten him. If the saint took time to want something explained and proved to them before they acted, they would have been bitten and died. They claim this shows that saints must simply do what the pastor says without asking why.
I say Phooey.
The Bereans were the type of people who heard preaching and CHECKED THE SCRIPTURES FOR THEMSELVES to see if what was preached was correct or not.
Act 17:11 These were more noble than those in Thessalonica, in that they received the word with all readiness of mind, and searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so.
The Bereans were not the sort of people who just took whatever they were told, nor just rejected something they never heard before. And the bible called them NOBLE. They actually checked the scriptures whether it was taught to them before or not. This goes the other way around, too. They did not just swallow whatever they were handed. They had the realization that if God wanted them to know something they should be able to see it for themselves in scripture.
So many saints have even told me that they cannot understand the bible in many areas. I said that did not mean God does not want them to be able to learn for themselves though. I am to help them honestly and reasonably be able to study the bible as a pastor. Too many think that is the pastor's job and not their own.
We owe it to ourselves to know the truth!
Somehow this fear of not digging into the bible, itself, may be plaguing your husband. It sounds like he simply does not think he can read the scriptures and see for himself what the bible is actually saying. And he has a fear of going into error. God's Word says that if we pray anything according to His will, we have the petitions we ask! In other words, God will especially answer your prayers to know the real truth of certain scriptures that some claim means no uncut hair on women. If uncut hair is the truth, then God will confirm that when you study. If not, then He will not. The point is DO NOT BE AFRAID TO STUDY THE BIBLE FOR YOURSELVES.
But do not get into it thinking God will show you one thing, and show someone else something else. There is only ONE TRUTH for each issue. And GOD WANTS US TO KNOW IT.
Those often set on old paths never have actually studied it for themselves. And they are actually afraid to, since they've been drilled about how anyone who disagrees is lost! God wants everyone to know the truth and the bible is not just for preachers to study.
I totally agree with what you said. And yes, I think my husband does have a fear of seeing something besides what he's been taught and possibly falling into error.
He has also been talking to his preacher friends about how I've been feeling and what I've had to say...and what they've told him has only made him more intent on keeping the old paths, no matter what his rebel of a wife wants to do.
__________________
"If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there."
I totally agree with what you said. And yes, I think my husband does have a fear of seeing something besides what he's been taught and possibly falling into error.
He has also been talking to his preacher friends about how I've been feeling and what I've had to say...and what they've told him has only made him more intent on keeping the old paths, no matter what his rebel of a wife wants to do.
Would he respond positively if you asked him to show you from the Bible where these things are true? To show you, biblically, why what you're feeling is wrong? Or would that just make him angry?
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