My good friend quit church. Any Suggestions

[RandyWayne]

Originally Posted by Nathaylie

Thank you all so much for your words of encouragement. A number of things really do concern me. Lost and Found really hit on a couple things. My friend is affecting her husbands ministry and left her walk with the Lord for very selfish reasons. Her husband unfortunately doesn't stand up for himself and he is so concerned for thier marriage that he lets her head the family. My wife and I are afraid she may try pulling him away from the Lord also.
Thank you all so much again for your advise.

This really says a lot. It says we don't know near enough facts to form any opinion.

I bolded a few words because I believe he, or any pastor, still needs to put his own family ahead of the church congregation. They are his main charge.

[MissBrattified]

Some people aren't so much done with God as they are done with people...and if people are the problem, then people treating them badly because they've quit is only going to reinforce what they already believe. Kindness and understanding is in order, and some additional consideration towards her husband, who is probably really feeling caught in the middle between two great loves, God and wife.

Originally Posted by MissBrattified

Some people aren't so much done with God as they are done with people...

I think you have said a mouthful here... I think part of my problem is that I am done with people... except for the very few that I allow into my "circle of trust"... and looking in the phone book for the closest Apostolic church isn't enough to be admitted into my circle of trust.

[ILG]

I would say just love her and encourage her to serve the Lord *wherever she chooses*. Hopefully she will at least attend another Christian church rather than really sinning.

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by Nathaylie

Thank you all so much for your words of encouragement. A number of things really do concern me. Lost and Found really hit on a couple things. My friend is affecting her husbands ministry and left her walk with the Lord for very selfish reasons. Her husband unfortunately doesn't stand up for himself and he is so concerned for thier marriage that he lets her head the family. My wife and I are afraid she may try pulling him away from the Lord also.
Thank you all so much again for your advise.

Well, here's a mouthful too. If he's allowing that, she doesn't respect him. He should be submissive to God and lead his family.

Sounds like there are a few underlying problems here.

[Scott Hutchinson]

Love your friend,and be her friend despite the fact you don't agree with her decision, love her and care about her no matter what.

[dizzyde]

Originally Posted by Nathaylie

We have a family that are very good friends of ours that have been serving the Lord and in church for around 15 years. They have 5 children, a couple of them girls. We also have a couple young daughters who are very close with theirs. The mother just recently decided she is done with church and done with trying to serve the Lord. She say’s she is tired of being judged for being different. Her husband is a minister and obviously has been put in an awkward position. Thank the Lord he say’s he loves her no matter what, whether she is in church or not.
My family has been praying for wisdom on how to handle this situation and how we can be most supportive yet not to condone our friend’s action.
Any suggestions?

LOVE HER!!!!! BE HER FRIEND!!! I cannot emphasize those two things enough.

It is not your job to judge her or her actions, and I don't care how much you think you know about this situation, unless you have lived in that home, behind the closed doors, you don't really know anything at all.

I don't know anything at all about the situation, but I do know when someone starts to make drastic life changes, there is more going on than meets the eye. If you show her anything but love, you will only be reinforcing her opinions.

I am not saying to condone her, but there is really no reason for you to have to put yourself in judgement over her actions unless you are her spiritual leader. You can tell her that you are praying for her, or that you don't understand the choices that she is making, but never put yourself in the position of being a judge of her actions, that is bad for her, but worse for you. It is not your responsibility to do anything other than to love her, pray for her and try to best witness of Christ that you can possibly be. IMO and experience.

[TK Burk]

Originally Posted by RandyWayne

This really says a lot. It says we don't know near enough facts to form any opinion.

I bolded a few words because I believe he, or any pastor, still needs to put his own family ahead of the church congregation. They are his main charge.

Amen! All too often the last house a minister teaches the gospel to is his own. This ought not to be. Noah built for his family first, and then offered space for others. Paul said a man not found supplying such care to his family is disqualified from being a leader in the Church (1Ti 3:4-5).

To often the popularity of a preacher is measured by the way in which they deliver a sermon to a crowd. Paul disagreed. He taught that a true man of God is determined first by how well they teach their own home. Imagine the revival America would have if all the apostolic men went home and taught….