Self Help Book Suggestion? - Page 2

coadie · #11 10-07-2010, 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by missourimary

SeekingOne already did that.

I can add a couple more if you'd like:
4) religion is being used against them. The Bible is used by the group, and it will take time (lots of it) to untangle what the Bible says from the actions of the group and the way they used the scriptures to prove they were right in those actions.
5) the group probably really has used the Bible to prove their actions were right
6) the person can probably quote the Bible quite well. They also probably have been taught to misread or simply ignore certain verses.

Those are reasons to go to the bible actually. Having people put a little spin on each and every selected verse may be the problem.

SeekingOne · #12 10-07-2010, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by coadie

Those are reasons to go to the bible actually. Having people put a little spin on each and every selected verse may be the problem.

I should send you to the cult this person left, you would get along just great there. Maybe you belong to it already?

Pragmatist · #13 10-07-2010, 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by missourimary

Boundaries by Cloud/Townsend might also help.

I haven't read this book, but I've heard really good things about it. I'm on the waiting list to get it from the library.

Sam · #14 10-07-2010, 01:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SeekingOne

The Bible, seriously?? Obviously you don't have a clue about leaving a cult. When a person leaves a cult, sometimes they can't even read the Bible. When they read the Bible, all they hear in their head is what they were taught the Bible says. They don't know truth from a lie if they grew up being taught lies.

Besides, we aren't talking fixing their theology, we are talking about helping them deal with seeing 100's of people they love, including blood relatives, that they are not even allowed to talk to.

Do you think the Bible will help them quit loving those people, so they don't wish to be with them?

I would suggest reading the Bible but in a newer translation/version.
The Living Bible is an older version but I personally still consider it a good one.
I just like the way Ken Taylor expresses some stuff.
The New Living Translation is good.

I'm not really KJV only but I basically judge everything by the KJV.
I like the NKJV because it is so much like the KJV but without some of the archaic terms.

The reason I would recommend a newer translation is because when reading the KJV the person would just hear some of the old condemnation and guilt trips echoed in the wording of the KJV.

SeekingOne · #15 10-07-2010, 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by coadie

You are silly. No one mentions the bible before me and you give me a sermon.

Self Help Book Suggestion

Self help is not the best way. Stores are loaded with self help books. Only the bible is rich in wisdom and creating discernement.

I will put in your court. List 2 examples how the bible would be detrimental to this issue.

Hey Codie, I don't want to get into anything here. You hit a hot spot. Anyway, you really don't know what it is like to leave a cult, so you you just need to back off with the Bible thing. This person could quote most of the Bible to you, they even know God loves them. What they need help with is dealing with seeing family and friends and pretending they are dead when they are very much alive.

coadie · #16 10-07-2010, 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SeekingOne

Hey Codie, I don't want to get into anything here. You hit a hot spot. Anyway, you really don't know what it is like to leave a cult, so you you just need to back off with the Bible thing. This person could quote most of the Bible to you, they even know God loves them. What they need help with is dealing with seeing family and friends and pretending they are dead when they are very much alive.

2 very common examples of religions that use shunning are Amish and Mormons. Does this case have examples of shunning?

rgcraig · #17 10-07-2010, 01:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SeekingOne

Hey Codie, I don't want to get into anything here. You hit a hot spot. Anyway, you really don't know what it is like to leave a cult, so you you just need to back off with the Bible thing. This person could quote most of the Bible to you, they even know God loves them. What they need help with is dealing with seeing family and friends and pretending they are dead when they are very much alive.

Quote:

Originally Posted by coadie

2 very common examples of religions that use shunning are Amish and Mormons. Does this case have examples of shunning?

Ah, coadie I think if you family and friends are pretending you are dead would constitute as shunning.

coadie · #18 10-07-2010, 01:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SeekingOne

I should send you to the cult this person left, you would get along just great there. Maybe you belong to it already?

This is funny. I would stir things up. Actually if it was me, I would walk right back into that church and initiate a little conversation. That is the last thing they would expect. I attend a good sized church so shunning doesn't work very well if anyone thought of trying it. Too many people would forget the long list of people they shouldn't talk to.

Pro31:28 · #19 10-07-2010, 01:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by coadie

This is funny. I would stir things up. Actually if it was me, I would walk right back into that church and initiate a little conversation. That is the last thing they would expect. I attend a good sized church so shunning doesn't work very well if anyone thought of trying it. Too many people would forget the long list of people they shouldn't talk to.

Well I promise that is not always the case, I lived it first hand- and for a married 22-year old, it wasn't too bad, for the teenages who I knew, who were not allowed to talk to any of the ONLY friends that they were allowed to have for the first 14 and 16 years of their life, it was difficult. (They still struggle to this day)

When you are walking through Walmart and you see women who you had parties and teas with, who you prayed for hours at an altar with, that can see you and literally stop and turn their cart the other direction, yea not so easy.

coadie · #20 10-07-2010, 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pro31:28

Well I promise that is not always the case, I lived it first hand- and for a married 22-year old, it wasn't too bad, for the teenages who I knew, who were not allowed to talk to any of the ONLY friends that they were allowed to have for the first 14 and 16 years of their life, it was difficult. (They still struggle to this day)

When you are walking through Walmart and you see women who you had parties and teas with, who you prayed for hours at an altar with, that can see you and literally stop and turn their cart the other direction, yea not so easy.

You gave a very vivid example. I had an employee with an issue with a person outside my company. I helped her innitiate with the other party and they cried and became best friends. Neither lady knew how to approach it and I helped one break the ice. They became friends.