Yep. I was thinking that this was more of a control issue ... with HER control over you.
Some folks just feel the need to show others that they can make you do what they want. I have had experiences when you give into some demands, they are not satisfied until you give into all their demands. I think that there should be some boundaries. Problem is, these types can cross your boundary anytime they wish, but you cannot cross their boundary.
Those types of people are the ones who are being petty, silly and egotistical and as long as you are pleasant to her (I know this is hard to do) you should be your own person unless your supervisor demands you succumb to this ... lady's ( ) idiosyncrasies.
This is it. And their boundaries are large and very beneficial to themselves. What I find interesting, in a psychological way, is that in most places, people just give in to this type (because they know if they don't, they will get a tantrum). I used to give in to this type and jump through hoops for everybody and you know what? I was sick a lot. I have noticed that people that are people pleasers seem to get sick a lot. Has anyone else noticed that? So, I find that sometimes I have to stand up for myself and it's not easy. I think we will be able to come to some sort of compromise. I told my sup I want to work in the back away from her. I think I can do that when the coworker is there. My other beef with the sup besides wanting me to give in to my coworker was telling me that there are other people that don't want to hop on my desk (briefly when they have to be there and she wants the keyboard flat and not be ergonomic). I don't know how I am expected to work at a non-ergonomic desk. I am pushing back on this one.
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Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the people doing it. ~Chinese Proverb
When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
PO, can I pick your nose? (Eww, I kind of grossed out just asking the question!)
LOL! I didn't realize I wrote they can pick YOUR nose.
Nobody has ever picked my nose, especially in a restaurant (except maybe my mother when I was a baby.)
NO!!!! You can't pick YOUR friend's nose! You can only pick your own!!!
"You can pick your friend, and you can pick your nose, but you CAN'T pick YOUR friend's nose"
Back to the keyboard and the Lysol. Every time she touches it, you need to do this, and then spray the keyboard. Make sure the eyeballs are really huge before you very s l o w l y open your mouth.
This is it. And their boundaries are large and very beneficial to themselves. What I find interesting, in a psychological way, is that in most places, people just give in to this type (because they know if they don't, they will get a tantrum). I used to give in to this type and jump through hoops for everybody and you know what? I was sick a lot. I have noticed that people that are people pleasers seem to get sick a lot. Has anyone else noticed that? So, I find that sometimes I have to stand up for myself and it's not easy. I think we will be able to come to some sort of compromise. I told my sup I want to work in the back away from her. I think I can do that when the coworker is there. My other beef with the sup besides wanting me to give in to my coworker was telling me that there are other people that don't want to hop on my desk (briefly when they have to be there and she wants the keyboard flat and not be ergonomic). I don't know how I am expected to work at a non-ergonomic desk. I am pushing back on this one.
Those type of people also try to make life a living hades for you at work too. They will say all manner of things so that other people will be afraid to be seen associating with you.
You are right, it's not easy to stand up for yourself, but...you will feel better about taking your stand to be your own person. It is just as easy for them to fix the desk to fit what they need. There are laws about handicap accommodations in the workplace, so if you have a special need, they should not be able to go over your head.
I would look up the laws to see how they apply to you and to cite them to anybody who complains. Good luck, my friend.
NO!!!! You can't pick YOUR friend's nose! You can only pick your own!!!
"You can pick your friend, and you can pick your nose, but you CAN'T pick YOUR friend's nose"
Back to the keyboard and the Lysol. Every time she touches it, you need to do this, and then spray the keyboard. Make sure the eyeballs are really huge before you very s l o w l y open your mouth.
LOL! Tempting, but that would make me look just plain stupid. It would make me feel good though.
I promise I won't pick your nose in public. Er. Ever.
Actually, I have a coworker whose breath is really, really bad. I have trouble standing and talking to her and I usually have to take a step backwards. I do wash the phone receiver after she uses it because it is really, really bad. She would be mortified if she knew this though.
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Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the people doing it. ~Chinese Proverb
When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
Those type of people also try to make life a living hades for you at work too. They will say all manner of things so that other people will be afraid to be seen associating with you.
You are right, it's not easy to stand up for yourself, but...you will feel better about taking your stand to be your own person. It is just as easy for them to fix the desk to fit what they need. There are laws about handicap accommodations in the workplace, so if you have a special need, they should not be able to go over your head.
I would look up the laws to see how they apply to you and to cite them to anybody who complains. Good luck, my friend.
Well I do know that if I am forced to use something non-ergonomic that that would not be kosher. I do feel better when I stand up for myself.
I had one woman who was making life at work a living hades last year or so. I stood up to her (by not giving in to her demands......that was all......no retaliation) and she kept upping and upping and upping the ante. I kept ignoring and refusing to retaliate. Finally, she could take it no longer and she openly verbally assaulted me but her and I were the only ones present of course (before this it had been undercover sniper shots for months). I walked away and told my supervisor. Again, I did not retaliate. We ended up sitting across from each other in the directors office. My coworker was mostly the one who was reprimanded but we were told if we ended up in the office again, we would BOTH be written up. This made me angry because I was put in the line of fire for doing NOTHING wrong. My sup said the director just said that because he had to be "fair". Anyway, this woman stopped talking to me altogether and for the first time in months, I was happy to go to work. She eventually moved and there was relative peace.
The woman I am dealing with now is not like this other woman. The other woman was just plain nasty. The woman I am dealing with now does have a heart in there somewhere but she is OCD and controlling. I think it will work out. (Hopefully) I just don't want to end up in front of the director again or it will look like there is a pattern. And there is a pattern. I don't like to take what I shouldn't have to.
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Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the people doing it. ~Chinese Proverb
When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
LOL! Tempting, but that would make me look just plain stupid. It would make me feel good though.
Yea, it probably would make you look stupid. I forgot that life is not actually a movie reel. Some people may not get it.
Quote:
I promise I won't pick your nose in public. Er. Ever.
Thanks, that is very comforting.
Quote:
Actually, I have a coworker whose breath is really, really bad. I have trouble standing and talking to her and I usually have to take a step backwards. I do wash the phone receiver after she uses it because it is really, really bad. She would be mortified if she knew this though.
That's bad. Okay, movie reel - She walks up, you are holding a clip board, - "Woah!!!!!!!!!", you exclaim, as you step back and hold it between you. She doesn't notice. Funny in a movie, not so funny in real life.
Yea, it probably would make you look stupid. I forgot that life is not actually a movie reel. Some people may not get it.
Thanks, that is very comforting.
That's bad. Okay, movie reel - She walks up, you are holding a clip board, - "Woah!!!!!!!!!", you exclaim, as you step back and hold it between you. She doesn't notice. Funny in a movie, not so funny in real life.
Here's one for you.
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Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the people doing it. ~Chinese Proverb
When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
It is my personal opinion that head on conflict with a problem co-worker rarely results in a positive opinion of the one "standing up".
It is however also true that skinning cats can be done in more than one way. and while conflict is not always a bad thing, any smart "conflictor" should always be aligned with the goals of the business....
What that means is, if one needs to deal with a problem co-worker, one should maneuver to a position where one is aligned with the stated goals of the business and the problem co-worker is not.
__________________ If I do something stupid blame the Lortab!
It is my personal opinion that head on conflict with a problem co-worker rarely results in a positive opinion of the one "standing up".
It is however also true that skinning cats can be done in more than one way. and while conflict is not always a bad thing, any smart "conflictor" should always be aligned with the goals of the business....
What that means is, if one needs to deal with a problem co-worker, one should maneuver to a position where one is aligned with the stated goals of the business and the problem co-worker is not.
That's a good point. I did do this because ironically just after my coworker complained about my ergonomic set-up, she dumped things on my desk because her wrists and hands were sore. I pointed that out to my sup.
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Those who say it cannot be done should not interrupt the people doing it. ~Chinese Proverb
When I was young and clever, I wanted to change the world. Now that I am older and wiser, I strive to change myself. ~
) idiosyncrasies.
and then spray the keyboard. Make sure the eyeballs are really huge before you very s l o w l y open your mouth. 
It would make me feel good though.
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