Dear Rhoni

[seguidordejesus]

BTW Coonskinner, spoke with your friend Bro. Zorich last Saturday night...great guy, as you well know

[Rhoni]

The first thing that we need to do is by really looking at the individual and recognizing just what it is that they want from us. We have to let the person coming to us know that their condition matters to us.

Starting where we are with this woman:

You might say, "I see that you are really feeling guilty thinking that you might not have really received the Holy Ghost when you were a young girl, am I right?" You have acknowledged that you were listening then asking her feedback letting her know you truly care.

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by seguidordejesus

Bro., how would you have preferred her pastor to handle the situation? I sincerely would like to know.

This is my thread so you two may exit and wait until I am done...thank-you for respecting my right to answer this dear lady!

Blessings, Rhoni

[seguidordejesus]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

This is my thread so you two may exit and wait until I am done...thank-you for respecting my right to answer this dear lady!

Blessings, Rhoni

ROFL!!!!

[Coonskinner]

Originally Posted by seguidordejesus

Bro., how would you have preferred her pastor to handle the situation? I sincerely would like to know.

I am not saying he handled it right; that is not my point.

But I don't think it is responsible to denigrate someone's spiritual leadership publicly or privately.

For one thing, we do not know the whole story.

There are always two sides, at least.

What we read might be absolutely and completely accurate...or it might not.

This is the internet.

I have pastored people who live in a constant state of mullygrubs, and have spent many hours talking with them and trying to encourage them. In some cases, they never take advice, and don't really want help, just attention. With those folks, at some point, you have to wean them off the constant draining process of listening to the same complaints over and over again with no progress.

Now, if what we read is an accurate picture, I would have taken some time and explained that a woman's body goes through many hormonal changes after childbirth, and tried to encourage the good sister to recognize that it is somewhat natural to feel emotions going out of control. I might have recommended that she see a doctor.

Regarding the Holy Ghost, I would take her to the Word and talk to her about walking by faith and not sight; I would point out the fruit of the Spirit in her life (hopefully--if there was some ) and do my best to build her faith all I could.

Something along those lines.

What bugged me about Rhoni's post was that rather than just addressing the issue, she had to start out by criticizing the pastor's reported handling of the situation.

I have lived long enough to know that things aren't always as they seem, and that is especially true on the internet.

[Rhoni]

We can not turn to the counselor's focus and the counselee's need.

To the counselee, understanding means that you heard what has been said, and have some idea of how they might be feeling. Caring is that you recognize they have doubts and guilty feelings. You might say: "It sounds like you are doubting your experience with Christ whan you were a child and it makes you feel guilty, am I right about that?"

[seguidordejesus]

Thanks, Coonskinner.

[Coonskinner]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

This is my thread so you two may exit and wait until I am done...thank-you for respecting my right to answer this dear lady!

Blessings, Rhoni

You may have started this thread, but you don't own it.

Last time I checked, it was a public forum, and I will therefore post as I see fit, and expect you to do the same.

Say what you like over here, but don't think I won't respond if I take a notion.

Nothing personal, Sis, just a matter of principle.

Stuff like this gives counsellors a bad name.

You need to learn to help, if you can, without subtly undermining the pastor in the process.

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

This is my thread so you two may exit and wait until I am done...thank-you for respecting my right to answer this dear lady!

Blessings, Rhoni

Rhoni, this is not YOUR thread.

[Rhoni]

Now, we can turn toward another focus. You don't need to "FIX" anything. Guide them to figure this out on their own. You might ask her: "Tell me about your experience with Christ when you were a child..." Open-ended so they can tell you their story.

I need to ask this woman to give me more information regarding the experience that she had when she was a child and thought she received the Holy Ghost.

I am asking her now...give me awhile to get a response.

Blessings, Rhoni