Have you ever been mad at God?

Rhoni · #1 12-18-2007, 05:21 AM

One of the things that it took me so long to admit [why I was so long in therapy] was that I was mad at God. I was taught never to question men of authority and absolutely never to question God.

My male therapist [graduated to a male therapist as I healed] asked me almost every session if I was mad at God and I would vehemently say, "No, I am not mad at God, if it hadn't been for Him I would have died, or at least sank into extreme depression." After badgering me with this question time and again; I finally said, "You are darn right I am mad at God. He could have fixed this and He didn't."

Mercy · #2 12-18-2007, 06:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rhoni

"You are darn right I am mad at God. He could have fixed this and He didn't."

Funny. I found myself saying practically the same thing. It is a hard thing to admit, especially when its something very painful to you, but people on the outside only see the "testimony". It makes it hard to find the support you need to heal emotionally.

Rhoni · #3 12-18-2007, 06:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mercy

Funny. I found myself saying practically the same thing. It is a hard thing to admit, especially when its something very painful to you, but people on the outside only see the "testimony". It makes it hard to find the support you need to heal emotionally.

Mercy,

Absolutely! I remember people praying for my physical healing during my car accident and months of hospitalization and years of recovery. While they prayed for my phsyical healing, which I never doubted God was going to do, I was praying for emotional healing and I sure didn't have any help from friends, family, church, or husband. That is why I get so angry when someone says, "Just get over it." It is never that simple.

God did give me some answers though. Did he give you any?

Blessings, Rhoni

#4 12-18-2007, 06:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rhoni

That is why I get so angry when someone says, "Just get over it." It is never that simple.

That's for sure.

Mercy · #5 12-18-2007, 06:37 AM

Painful to admit...but I stopped asking for them. Ironically enough the "pivitol" point for me was a car accident as well. I was hurt really badly and the driver (the man I was gonna marry) was killed. When the miraculous recovery of my physical body was manifested (that you Jesus) no one thought about the emotional and mental and spiritual battle I was warring....the death of my best friend. Even now when people ask me about my scars and if its not a good day and I say I dont want to talk about it I get responses that are very crass. Its hard to try and make people understand it from both angles...I am rediculously grateful for my physical healing....cuz it is a very good testimony indeed! Just trying to maintain hope that one day I will have another awesome testimony of how my heart has been healed and my trust in God restored. That gets harder everyday...

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Mercy,

Absolutely! I remember people praying for my physical healing during my car accident and months of hospitalization and years of recovery. While they prayed for my phsyical healing, which I never doubted God was going to do, I was praying for emotional healing and I sure didn't have any help from friends, family, church, or husband. That is why I get so angry when someone says, "Just get over it." It is never that simple.

God did give me some answers though. Did he give you any?

Blessings, Rhoni

Rhoni · #6 12-18-2007, 06:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ronzo

That's for sure.

Ronzo,

Speaking of Isaiah...today God gave me an answer to my critical thinking. It is found in Isaiah 45:9;

Woe to him who quarrels with his Maker,
to him who is a ptsherd among the
potsherds on the ground.
Does the clay say to the potter,
'What are you making?'
Does your work say,
'He has no hands'?
Woe to him who says to his father,
'What have you begotten?'
or to his mother,
'What have you brought to birth'?
This is what the Lord says-
the Holy One of Israel, and its Maker;
Concerning things to come,
do you question me about my children, or give me orders about the work of my hands?
It is I who made the earth
and created manknind upon it.
My own hnads stretched out the heavens;
I marshaled their starry hosts.
I will raise up Cyrus in my righteousness;
I will make all his ways straight.
He will rebuild my city.

Rhoni · #7 12-18-2007, 07:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mercy

Painful to admit...but I stopped asking for them. Ironically enough the "pivitol" point for me was a car accident as well. I was hurt really badly and the driver (the man I was gonna marry) was killed. When the miraculous recovery of my physical body was manifested (that you Jesus) no one thought about the emotional and mental and spiritual battle I was warring....the death of my best friend. Even now when people ask me about my scars and if its not a good day and I say I dont want to talk about it I get responses that are very crass. Its hard to try and make people understand it from both angles...I am rediculously grateful for my physical healing....cuz it is a very good testimony indeed! Just trying to maintain hope that one day I will have another awesome testimony of how my heart has been healed and my trust in God restored. That gets harder everyday...

Mercy,

God is a BIG God with BROAD shoulders. He has an answer for you...but you have to be ready to heal. Many times we hold on to our pain because we enjoy it. We use it as an excuse to stay where we are when God has so much more to give us and to show us. Tell him how you 'FEEL'. Tell him why you are angry. Don't hedge or come up with nice words so that he won't get angry with you. He knows what you are saying in your heart and mind. As all the venom spews out...He will cover it with His blood and fill the empty place in your heart with so much love that it will amaze you.

This is what he used to help me, and my situation is different from yours but the feelings probably the same:

God used this opportunity to show me a bit of his sovereign nature.
He showed me where my will and another's will were at odds.
God, in his sovereignity loves his sons and daughters equally.
He will not let my will be done to the overriding of another person's will.
What he did show me is who I am and what I mean to him.

He promised to never leave me nor forsake me. This has covered my abandonment and rejection issues.
Romans 8:28 promises me that he is working all things [those both good and bad] for my good.
He called me according to his purpose:
He foreknew decisions I would make and that others would make.
He pre-destined me to be conformed to the image of Jesus Christ.
Hejustifies those he calls and glorifies them.

God didn't spare his son Jesus from the sufferring that His will could be accomplished in us so...
Why would God take away our sufferring to conform us to his will?

I ask you...Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or nakedness, or sword?

Rhoni · #8 12-18-2007, 07:10 AM

Mercy,

Your fiance who died; what would he tell you? There is a best friend closer than he was...Jesus also has a word for you...when you are ready to let me heal you.

Praying for you,
Rhoni

Mercy · #9 12-18-2007, 07:16 AM

Thank you. I know He has answers...just dont know how to get to them. Ready to heal. I know what you mean. I remember the time when I wasn't. I've been in ready mode for about 7 years now. I thought this year was gonna be it because I took deliberate steps in the direction of getting help, but they weren't the steps I was "supposed" to take because all the doors closed. I am fine with that. I just want Him to hurry up.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Mercy,

God is a BIG God with BROAD shoulders. He has an answer for you...but you have to be ready to heal. Many times we hold on to our pain because we enjoy it. We use it as an excuse to stay where we are when God has so much more to give us and to show us. Tell him how you 'FEEL'. Tell him why you are angry. Don't hedge or come up with nice words so that he won't get angry with you. He knows what you are saying in your heart and mind. As all the venom spews out...He will cover it with His blood and fill the empty place in your heart with so much love that it will amaze you.

This is what he used to help me, and my situation is different from yours but the feelings probably the same:

God used this opportunity to show me a bit of his sovereign nature.
He showed me where my will and another's will were at odds.
God, in his sovereignity loves his sons and daughters equally.
He will not let my will be done to the overriding of another person's will.
What he did show me is who I am and what I mean to him.

He promised to never leave me nor forsake me. This has covered my abandonment and rejection issues.
Romans 8:28 promises me that he is working all things [those both good and bad] for my good.
He called me according to his purpose:
He foreknew decisions I would make and that others would make.
He pre-destined me to be conformed to the image of Jesus Christ.
Hejustifies those he calls and glorifies them.

God didn't spare his son Jesus from the sufferring that His will could be accomplished in us so...
Why would God take away our sufferring to conform us to his will?

I ask you...Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or nakedness, or sword?

Rhoni · #10 12-18-2007, 07:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mercy

Thank you. I know He has answers...just dont know how to get to them. Ready to heal. I know what you mean. I remember the time when I wasn't. I've been in ready mode for about 7 years now. I thought this year was gonna be it because I took deliberate steps in the direction of getting help, but they weren't the steps I was "supposed" to take because all the doors closed. I am fine with that. I just want Him to hurry up.

Mercy,

Healing is a process...I know you know this...I have read your posts and you have a lot of insight. Many times we fail to see what is right before our eyes because we have a pre-conceived expectation as to what our healing, and what God will do, and it is not really what God wants or has in store for us.

I don't know if God deals with you as he does with me, but when I pray about a situation he immediately slams doors in my face. He does it because I am so stupid sometimes and if he doesn't just get in my face I will fall into a pit out of naivity, or slip into the pit because someone pushes me into it. Then again I get so tired of waiting that I demand to be put into a pit by a wrong choice that I purposely make.

I could give you an example: Never mind. I will do it privately if you want it. Those who would have my head on a platter would get too much mileage out of my transparency so I shall refrain.

Look outside your box. Trust God even if it doesn't look like you expect it to look.

Blessings, Rhoni