Dear Rhoni

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by RevDWW

And I ain't got much school'n....well formal school'n that is.........

Well some are born with it, and some have to go to college...

Blessings, Rhoni

[Rhoni]

Dear Rhoni,

What do you think about paying people to come in and provide nursery care for the infants and toddlers birth to 2 years old so that parents can enjoy the service? Our church has just begun doing this and I wasn't sure why. My mother raised five of us in church and she made us behave. I don't remember ever going to the nursery. Just curious as to what you think?

Curious Mom

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Dear Rhoni,

What do you think about paying people to come in and provide nursery care for the infants and toddlers birth to 2 years old so that parents can enjoy the service? Our church has just begun doing this and I wasn't sure why. My mother raised five of us in church and she made us behave. I don't remember ever going to the nursery. Just curious as to what you think?

Curious Mom

Dear Mom,

This has begun as somewhat of a common practice in many of our churches today, here are some reasons why:

1. If you get a paid worker trained in infant CPR and proper child care it is a saftey factor for young mothers who also need to have a break to enjoy services.

2. It is better if the worker is not in your church because many times nursery workers don't have consistent help or rotation allowing them time to glean strength from attending the services themselves.

3. Todays churches are built on young women's participation in Sunday School, chior, and other areas of ministry and having paid, quality child care frees them up to serve at their local assembly.

4. If you have visitors and they know there is adequate child care then they are free to worship and pay attention and hear the truth that God wants to reveal to them. This is a great asset to the community as an outreach tool.

5. After the age of 2 a young mother has plenty of time to train her child to behave in service. I remember my mother, she also had 5 children...if we acted up in church she would file us all out...spank our honey buns, and march us back in to church - tears and all. Talk about embarrassing! But because of her training I do not chew gum in church, hate to sit by someone who tries to talk with me through the service because I want to pay attention, and I sit on the front row...have for as long as I can remember so I don't get distracted by others who are disrespectful, and have plenty of shouting room!

6. As churches grow and more income comes in then many needed ministries can be funded through the church...this is just one of them.

I hope this helps, Rhoni

[Rhoni]

Dear Rhoni,

My daughter is going to a local college and majoring in Psychology. She wants to be a Christian Counselor. She was wondering what advice you might have for her. I am not sure she knows what she is getting into after reading so many posts against counselors on this forum.

Concerned Parent

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Rhoni

Dear Rhoni,

My daughter is going to a local college and majoring in Psychology. She wants to be a Christian Counselor. She was wondering what advice you might have for her. I am not sure she knows what she is getting into after reading so many posts against counselors on this forum.

Concerned Parent

Dear Parent,

My first gut reaction is to tell her to change her major...but if she is anything like me...that will just fuel her determination...with this in mind I will have to give this some thought and post in a while. I need to choose my words carefully.

Blessings, Rhoni

[Rhoni]

Dear Parent,

I would advise that your daughter talk to several Christian/Apostolic counselors and see what they would suggest are the barriers to counseling in Apostolic circles. I would ask her what her expectations are as compared to the reality of what Counselors really do.

I would advise that she not date until after she is established in her profession and then only date those men who are supportive of her profession and calling in Christ.

There are others things I might suggest but I think she needs to be the one to pursue the issue for herself. if she would like to talk with me I am available to speak with her at her convenience.

Blessings, Rhoni

[Lost]

Dear Rhoni,

I have a friend who is constantly undermining the importance of pastoral authority in his life even though he firmly calls himself a Christian. I really think that he's been hurt in the past and is maybe dealing with some left-over bitterness. Isn't it a bit hypocrytical (sp?) for him to call himself a Christian and yet still tear down what God has put in place to help him? I'm not one to get in his business, as thats between him and God, but I sometimes worry about him. I almost feel like he is setting himself up for a fall.

Any ideas about how to help him as a friend?

Lost

[Rhoni]

Originally Posted by Lost

Dear Rhoni,

I have a friend who is constantly undermining the importance of pastoral authority in his life even though he firmly calls himself a Christian. I really think that he's been hurt in the past and is maybe dealing with some left-over bitterness. Isn't it a bit hypocrytical (sp?) for him to call himself a Christian and yet still tear down what God has put in place to help him? I'm not one to get in his business, as thats between him and God, but I sometimes worry about him. I almost feel like he is setting himself up for a fall.

Any ideas about how to help him as a friend?

Lost

Dear Lost,

I think a wise Pastor would recognize his pain and set loving boundaries; not allowing him to tear up his church, or harm his ministry while loving and trying to heal his hurts.

Christians many times function out of hurt. Those around them need to pray for this person and do their best not to publically call him out as to his perceived behaviors. The Bible tells us to go privately to the brother, confront him, and in love restore him with a humble heart and attitude.

The wrong thing to do is to give the person more ammunition to hold more grudges, or offenses. Prayerfully handling such a person, in love, and privately, would be the best thing.

Blessings, Rhoni

[Rhoni]

Dear Rhoni,

Jill & I were seeing each other off and on for almost a year and then
Jill decided to no longer wanted to see me. We have tried to remain friends. Jill has moved on and has begun seeing another man.

Funny thing is.. Jill hated when I would use challenging words, wanted to discuss intellectual subjects, or discussed politics. Now she tells others that she loves these things about the other man. I am not sure what happened in our relationship and why she accepts this type of behavior from this man and not from me. Can you help me to understand?

Heartbroken in Oregon

[Rhoni]

Dear Heartbroken,

There are many components to a relationship: physcial attraction, intellectual communication/stimualtion, emotional security, and well as compatibility. Dating is a way to explore relationships to see what appeal to us or the attributes that we value more than others.

The failure to connect with Jill may not have been intellectually, but may have been that she liked you for a friend but you just did not connect in other ways. Many times we can't put our finger on any one thing that is attributed to making a relationship not progress the way we expected.

This is one reason to maintain moral integrity and keep yourself from forming a physical relationship before marriage. Sometimes we connect physically before we have time to find out how compatible, or how much you really care about the other person. How much we have in common in the areas of spirituality, family of origin issues, intectually, common goals, and activites one enjoys are issues that need to be explored before making a commitment to another.

Heartbroken, as much as you are disappointed that she did not feel as you wanted her to about you...if you trust what Romans 8:28 tells you then you will know that God has a special relationship picked out just for you that will exceed anything you have felt for Jill or anyone else in your past.

If you truly care about Jill, then you will want her to be happy even if it is without you. Stop looking for reasons why it didn't work and rejoice with her for what she has found knowing that God has someone else for you that is more than you hoped or dreamed possible.

Remember, it wasn't about anything you did or didn't do. She just wasn't the one. Rejoice knowing that there are many women looking for someone just like you, and they are hoping you find them. Cast the line back into the sea...knowing there are many other beautiful fish to be caught.

Happy fishing, Rhoni