Rejection

[RandyWayne]

Originally Posted by Amanah

ask a less then perfect, chubby girl out?

Those were the ones that nearly everyone tried to set me up with. lol

Some, surprisingly not all though, were very nice and am still friends with. Just never felt any romantic interest.

[Titus2woman]

Originally Posted by RandyWayne

Those were the ones that nearly everyone tried to set me up with. lol

Some, surprisingly not all though, were very nice and am still friends with. Just never felt any romantic interest.

Because they were chubby or for some other reason?

[Aquila]

Originally Posted by Titus2woman

Why be angry Matt... people have all kinds of things on their minds... she may be head over heels in love with someone who doesn't even know she is alive, she may have just been diagnosed with a social disease or be gay... If someone doesn't want to go out with you it probably doesn't have as much to do with you as it does with them...

Always try to remember that you are not the center of the universe... it helps me

I think we ALL can benefit from this post. Love it! Thanks!

[RandyWayne]

Originally Posted by Titus2woman

Because they were chubby or for some other reason?

Because they are, mmmmmmm, larger than, well heavier than me. Doesn't effect my opinion of them in any of the ways that matter but it doesn't exactly make me want to, welll, mmmmm, get it on either.

[Amanah]

Originally Posted by RandyWayne

Because they are, mmmmmmm, larger than, well heavier than me. Doesn't effect my opinion of them in any of the ways that matter but it doesn't exactly make me want to, welll, mmmmm, get it on either.

same way short guys make me uncomfortable I guess . . .

there is a guy here at work, must be barely over 5'2", I always feel bad for him when I'm standing next to him . . .

[RandyWayne]

Originally Posted by Amanah

same way short guys make me uncomfortable I guess . . .

there is a guy here at work, must be barely over 5'2", I always feel bad for him when I'm standing next to him . . .

I'm only 5'6 (was 5'7 20 years ago LOL) so in the past women have rarely gone "Wow. He's short!" BUT I never fit into the 6'0+ mold that most want either. My wife is actually 5'9. When we were married I wore my normal dress shoes and she was barefoot. LOL

[Aquila]

This seems like an issue that's facing more single Christian and Apostolic men than we might realize.

Would it be wrong for an Apostolic brother to get some game?

You know... learn how to break the ice, flirt, use humour, tease, and understand how to provoke various emotional responses in women?

In the animal kingdom, men are often the most colorful and flamboyant. They have their song, their dance, and their brilliantly colored feathers. I know single guys who can't score a date that are great guys. But I've talked to girls who turned them down and I hear, "He's really nice. But he's really plain.", or, "He's really nice, but I don't think he's my type.", or, "He's really nice... but really... who is he?", or this one, "He's really nice...but he dresses like my dad." LOL Lastly, this one, "I really think he's neat... but he's too nice." (Read insecure and seemingly co-dependent, begging for a date).

Guys, if she feels you're begging for a date... she's most likely turn you down, at least on the first attempt. Why? Because if you appear to beg... you just sent a subconscious signal that she's worthy of someone better than YOU (negative social value). Is there any surprise that the first attempt fails miserably? But too many of us guys don't pick up on something this subtle. Even the women who receive this subtle message don't realize this is what's happening until it's discussed some time later.

These great friends of mine who go dateless are... well... BORING. Or at least they are perceived as being boring. They have no song to sing, no dance to dance, no feathers to ruffle. Is there an art to being a charming, confident, funny, and interesting man? A man who can give a woman the impression that his asking her out on a date isn't him begging or pleading for a chance... but rather... him extending the honor of inviting her to spend some time with him?

There's a reason why I'm asking...

Thoughts?

[RandyWayne]

Originally Posted by Aquila

This seems like an issue that's facing more single Christian and Apostolic men than we know.

Would it be wrong for an Apostolic brother to get some game?

You know... learn how to break the ice, flirt, use humour, tease, and understand how to provoke various emotional responses in women?

In the animal kingdom, men are often the most colorful and flamboyant. They have their song, their dance, and their brilliantly colored feathers. I know single guys who can't score a date that are great guys. But I've talked to girls who turned them down and I hear, "He's really nice. But he's really plain.", or, "He's really nice, but I don't think he's my type.", or, "He's really nice... but really... who is he?", or this one, "He's really nice...but he dresses like my dad." LOL Lastly, this one, "I really think he's neat... but he's too nice." (Read insecure and seemingly co-dependent).

This great friends of mine who go dateless are... well... BORING. They have no song to sing, no dance to dance, no feathers to ruffle. Is there an art to being a charming, confident, funny, and interesting man? A man who can give a woman the impression that his asking her out on a date isn't him begging or pleading for a chance... but rather... him extending the honor of inviting her to spend some time with him?

There's a reason why I'm asking...

Thoughts?

Oh, I have plenty of thoughts on this! Even though I am happily married, it is still important to 'act out' all the flirtatious behavior that we engaged in while still dating (only with each other of course).

I've tweaked T2W a bit on this issue and do not believe that something being sexually suggestive is necessarily bad. Nor do I believe that a woman's appearance is solely for the purpose of making/feeding babies. Why would King Solomon write about a lovers curves if their sole purpose was nursing? By the way, did you see the View to a Kill video on the other thread yet?

And young people in apostolic circles are no different than young people anywhere else in their desire for opposite sex companionship. THEY just make a pretense of spiritualizing it and pretending they are not like the world as they go about doing the exact same song and dance in front of people they are "attracted too" that anyone else would. Oh, how I remember the good old family camp days!

[Aquila]

Originally Posted by RandyWayne

Oh, I have plenty of thoughts on this! Even though I am happily married, it is still important to 'act out' all the flirtatious behavior that we engaged in while still dating (only with each other of course).

I've tweaked T2W a bit on this issue and do not believe that something being sexually suggestive is necessarily bad. Nor do I believe that a woman's appearance is solely for the purpose of making/feeding babies. Why would King Solomon write about a lovers curves if their sole purpose was nursing? By the way, did you see the View to a Kill video on the other thread yet?

And young people in apostolic circles are no different than young people anywhere else in their desire for opposite sex companionship. THEY just make a pretense of spiritualizing it and pretending they are not like the world as they go about doing the exact same song and dance in front of people they are "attracted too" that anyone else would. Oh, how I remember the good old family camp days!

LOL Great points.

Randy, did you "WOW" your wife when you first met? Was it strategic because you knew you REALLY wanted to get to know her... or was it just something you left to happenstance?

[RandyWayne]

Originally Posted by Aquila

LOL Great points.

Randy, did you "WOW" your wife when you first met? Was it strategic because you knew you REALLY wanted to get to know her... or was it just something you left to happenstance?

Except for our very first meeting, which was a miracle in and of itself, most things I did and said were very calculated. LOL