Needing advice

[Hoovie]

Originally Posted by ManOfWord

Listen, I have been on the other end of what you are going through as a pastor. I was insecure, and controlling and didn't want ANYONE to leave for any reason. We saw some growth, but I hurt many people with my control issues. It was totally wrong of me to lead the way I did, but that was what I was taught. I really didn't know any better.

Now, I know better. I want what is best for the families in the church I pastor. If leaving is the best for them, then I wish them God speed. I used to take it very personal, but no longer. These sheep belong to the Lord and not me. When a pastor begins taking ownership of the sheep....it's time to move...because abuse always follows.

My advice....follow the Cloud!

This is wisdom brother. My own pastor is very much like you.

[Raven]

Originally Posted by ManOfWord

Listen, I have been on the other end of what you are going through as a pastor. I was insecure, and controlling and didn't want ANYONE to leave for any reason. We saw some growth, but I hurt many people with my control issues. It was totally wrong of me to lead the way I did, but that was what I was taught. I really didn't know any better.

Now, I know better. I want what is best for the families in the church I pastor. If leaving is the best for them, then I wish them God speed. I used to take it very personal, but no longer. These sheep belong to the Lord and not me. When a pastor begins taking ownership of the sheep....it's time to move...because abuse always follows.

My advice....follow the Cloud!

MOW
Would to God that all pastors had your wisdom and balance. Good words, "Follow the Cloud!"
Raven

[freeatlast]

17 years ago my wife and I and our daughter left a very controlling church. nobody could leave this church..it wasn't allowed.

If you left the congregation was told to have no fellowship with you.

When we left..we just left. There was no reason for me to talk to the pastor further, unless i just wanted to hear I wrong I was about leaving.

Our new pastor asked for a letter of transfer since both were upc's in neighboring towns.

I wrote a letter to the former pastor asking for said letter and it was sent.

Leaving the situation I was in was the best move i ever made in my spirtual life.

God IS NOT in controlling churches.

Thank God that in Christ we have liberty and freedom and joy in Christ.

If those things are lackig in the assembly you're in, I don't care if it's upc or (any other brand).....I'd sooner go to a Baptist church than ever again be entangled under the leadership of a control freak pastor.

[Hoovie]

HD, I guess I have mixed feelings about you posting this very very personal experience, but it is evident you need someone and we can pray with you.

I pray you find and connect to a group of believers that fills the needs in you and your family's life.

[Hisdaughter]

I appreciate the words of advise, understanding and encouragment. WE are trusting in Him and He will bring us through.

Thank you

HD

[Hisdaughter]

Steven Hoover! That is so cool! I just went to your website. We saw that show. We loved it. Your wife was great! We loved how she handled herself. Its awesome that the other family is given to prayer and bible study now. Praise God!

My kids enjoyed your website and remembering the episode )

HD

[Sister Alvear]

I know there will be hurts but you must do what is best for your family and their salvation.

[Hoovie]

Originally Posted by Hisdaughter

Steven Hoover! That is so cool! I just went to your website. We saw that show. We loved it. Your wife was great! We loved how she handled herself. Its awesome that the other family is given to prayer and bible study now. Praise God!

My kids enjoyed your website and remembering the episode )

HD

Glad you enjoyed it!

Here is a thread that we discussed this on.

http://www.apostolicfriendsforum.com...read.php?t=661

[Hisdaughter]

Well, it's been a year since I wrote here asking for advise. And as I re-read my post and all your replies, I realize I never did stop and say a HUGE Thank you to all of you that took the time to share, advise and let me know you would pray for us.

I dont even know if you will receive this, but I wanted to let you know that..

It really meant alot to my husband and I. Considering we really didnt have anyone to turn to who would give us unbiased advise.

We did find a wonderful church. We have been there for over a year now. A Jesus Name Spirit filled church. Our kids are growing, we are growing. My husband received the baptism of the HOLY GHOST in February!!! Oh! I am just so thankful! I have seen so many changes in him. And we have seen SO MANY others receive the Holy Ghost as well!

The preaching is powerful and anointed, Im still pondering that last three messages in my heart and without the CD! The praise and worship is just so anointed as well. At first I would just cry and cry because I couldnt believe how blessed i was to be there. The Pastor and the Worship leaders are just so sensitive to the move of God and allow God to have His perfect way. I kept thinking we were going to be led to stop praising and worshiping.. but thank god we are encouraged to stay in His beautiful presence.

And the alter calls are just what I had always desired, and thank God, because that is where my husband received the holy ghost. My youngest daughter is just in tears at the alter, worshiping with the other children.

There is time during services to allow God to deliver. We have now moved on to two services and the church is growing big time! So many new believers being introduced to the power of Gods love.

My oldest daughter (who is grown and married) has come to visit with her husband and for the first time I have seen my eldest in tears as she experienced His presence. And she was there to witness her father receive the Holy Ghost, she was in tears through that too. And that is a miracle, because she doesnt like to show softness, especially at church. So, you can imagine the blessing.

They have made some decisions to start coming to church, but so far havent kept to it. Still I am thankful and know the day will come. My son in law has said that when they have children they will be bringing them to this church. That is another miracle for him to even say that, because he is raised jehova's witness. God is so good!

The Sunday School is a HUGE DEAL, the leaders know how important it is to capture them at this age. Sunday School is certainly not taken lightly. There is SO MUCH vision and hard work and preparation put into it.

Men and women are not glorified, God is. There's no room for pride, because there are so many being used. Everyone is encouraged to seek God for thier gifts and talents and put them to work. And all to the glory of God. I see so much humility. So many humble leaders and I LOVE THAT.


We have an awesome highschool Youth Pastor and wife. He even takes time to meet with my son one on one to encourage him and to find out what my sons calling is.


Well, that's all, I just wanted to say, thank you. Thank you for praying the Lord answered . We are very thankful to Him. We lost a lot of friends we considered dear. But God knows what is best. Not a one of us has ever regretted the move. We are SO FED and have never thought of going back or that we have made a mistake. We have no doubts that it was Gods will.

Even our marriage has been so strengthened through this change. God is just incredible!

Sandra

[Sinatra]

Your story brought me to tears. God has certainly written a beautiful chapter to your life story. I rejoice with you for all that God is doing in your Church and in the lives of your family.

God Bless,
Sinatra