Do you believe the innocent party in a situation - Page 16

*AQuietPlace* · #**151** 05-14-2009, 11:26 AM

I agree. There is NO excuse for sin! Period!!

Forgiveness, yes. Thankfully. But no excuse. Otherwise, why does God send us to hell for it??

It's says that adulterers will have their part in the lake of fire, and it doesn't say - AND the person who CAUSED them to commit it. No, we are responsible for our own actions.

*AQuietPlace* · #**152** 05-14-2009, 11:27 AM

PO, I DO agree with your point that the other person probably has some sins that they are going to have to answer to God for. I just disagree that anyone can CAUSE someone else to sin.

MissBrattified · #**153** 05-14-2009, 11:29 AM

My father was VERY gruff and hard to deal with--yet my mother remained a faithful, patient wife for over 50 years. I don't even recall her ever raising her voice at him.

There's no excuse for stepping out of the contract. Period.

Pressing-On · #**154** 05-14-2009, 11:31 AM

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Originally Posted by MissBrattified

So your stance is that if a woman (or man) denies their spouse continually it's sinful, but if they do it once or twice, it's not?

I think in marriages you learn things and make mistakes. It's sinful to continue in that pattern, not trying to do better. I know marriages like that - they don't try and find excuses for bad behaviour toward each other. I think that is the larger issue and sin.

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Sorry, I thought you were referring the "How would you know" in MY direction--not your husband. My mistake.

No problemo. I didn't see that one coming as to misinterpretation. Perhaps my posts are getting way too long, which is not typically normal for me. I'm sounding a bit long winded, which is annoying. lol!

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LOL!!! Well, sorry for providing it, but the "how would you know" felt like you were saying...oh, never mind.

It was my fault for not being plain on what I meant. Wasn't sure I wanted to talk about my husband, here, in any way that wasn't general. I'm very protective of what people may say or how they may react to him - Mama Bear! LOL!

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You're not getting it. Honestly.

I've never been in the position of being angry with Jeff and having him ask me for sex. He doesn't act like he wants to have sex either, when he's mad. So how am I delusional? Usually we stomp around the house, acting like total brats, and bickering until we either have it figured out, or agree to disagree, and then peace is restored.

Are there actually men out there who try to have sex with their wives when their wives are angry or upset? At least, visibly so?

Uh, yes!!!

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If that happened to me, and I was still upset for some reason, I would try to resolve it FIRST. Are there women who have sex while they're angry? Rather than saying, "__________, I'm upset with you. Can we talk about this first?"

That's not to say that when Jeff's just being his irritating self, I can't set that aside. LOL!!! I've done that more than once, as I'm sure many couples do. I'm talking about REAL anger and issues, not pretend, and an actual problem--not just a personality conflict or being annoyed that he left his socks on the floor.

Sure, we have worked through it and done the deed while mad. Who hasn't? I'm not sure that Paul is speaking of when you have an intense moment. I think he is speaking more in lines of being lazy and uncaring as to the needs of the other. Just by nature itself, it's hard to reconcile coming together under such intensity, so I'm not sure, unless it's a pattern, that Paul is referring to isolation instances.

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The fact that you say "can stay mad" makes it look deliberate. Do you get and/or stay angry deliberately? I don't. This is probably a personality difference. I just don't stay mad very long, so that further illustrates it. In our house, Jeff takes longer to get over things than I do, so that may be why this problem doesn't exist.

I may deliberately stay angry because I'm not ready to be humble. I'm sure that is a personality quirk of mine. I'm just like my Daddy.

It hasn't affected our "defrauding", so I'm good.

Although, he did confess on our 21st wedding anniversary that he has enjoyed riling me up through the years. The fault lies with him! That does happen to be a family trait on his part - like father, like son.

Pressing-On · #**155** 05-14-2009, 11:32 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MissBrattified

My father was VERY gruff and hard to deal with--yet my mother remained a faithful, patient wife for over 50 years. I don't even recall her ever raising her voice at him.

There's no excuse for stepping out of the contract. Period.

You can gauge every women by your mother, which is honorable of you, but it just doesn't work.

*AQuietPlace* · #**156** 05-14-2009, 11:33 AM

There is a woman in our church whose husband treats her like an absolute dog. He's constantly verbally abusing her, threatening to leave her, telling her she's worthless, prohibiting her from coming to church, etc. She is a lovely woman of God, and treats him with respect, never threatening to leave him or find another man.

If anyone would have an "excuse" for adultery, she would. But she's a child of God, trying to please Him, and she hasn't made the choice to commit adultery. That's the way it should be.

Pressing-On · #**157** 05-14-2009, 11:33 AM

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Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

You didn't state whether or not she actually committed adultery. If she did, she sinned, she was wrong.

It doesn't matter whether she did or not - they were both wrong. He wasn't loving his wife like Christ loved the Church. He was part of causing her to stumble. She was wrong also.

Pressing-On · #**158** 05-14-2009, 11:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

There is a woman in our church whose husband treats her like an absolute dog. He's constantly verbally abusing her, threatening to leave her, telling her she's worthless, prohibiting her from coming to church, etc. She is a lovely woman of God, and treats him with respect, never threatening to leave him or find another man.

If anyone would have an "excuse" for adultery, she would. But she's a child of God, trying to please Him, and she hasn't made the choice to commit adultery. That's the way it should be.

Again, it's noble to want everyone to be of the same character and makeup, but it's just not the case. The Bible wouldn't address weakness and our responsibility to those that are weak if it was.

rgcraig · #**159** 05-14-2009, 11:35 AM

So many things to say, but trying not to.......

Pressing-On · #**160** 05-14-2009, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by *AQuietPlace*

PO, I DO agree with your point that the other person probably has some sins that they are going to have to answer to God for. I just disagree that anyone can CAUSE someone else to sin.

I Cor 8:11 "And through thy knowledge shall the weak brother perish, for whom Christ died?"
I Cor 8:12 "But when ye sin so against the brethren, and wound their weak conscience, ye sin against Christ."