Just Trying to Be a Good Father

Originally Posted by Coonskinner

Just this week, I have taken a trip down memory lane in order to try and be a good father to my sons.

The latest rage at their little country school is shooting "paper hornets" off rubber bands at one another.

This is of course a non-sanctioned activity as far as the teachers are concerned...but, like when I was a lad, it goes on.

Anyway, after abserving them making up supplies of ammunition in the evenings, preparing for the next day's battles, my mind drifted back to the days of my childhood, and of battles I fought and won in that very same arena.

I was an innovative kid, and always looked for ways to get the edge on the competition. This led to some pretty intensive research and development which in turn catapulted me into superpower status in the paper hornet wars.

So, desiring to be a good father, I sat down with my boys and had a serious conversation with them.

I asked them if they were fully aware of the fact that they were going to be in trouble with their teachers if they got caught shooting paper hornets...they affirmed that they were indeed aware.

I then asked them, in all honesty, if they planned to go ahead shooting them and take their chances...again, an affirmative answer.

My next question was, "Are you prepared to accept the consequences like men and not whine if you get nailed?"

They assured me that they were.

So, having cleared the preliminaries, I sat down with them to show them how to make the best paper hornets known to man, with several innovative features that will raise whelps of maximum size upon impact.

I know a little something about boys, and one of the things I know is that they are going to do these things. So, my philosophy is, if it's worth doing, it's worth doing right.

Anyway, I showed them how to embed bb's in their paper hornets and wrap them with duct tape so that they can demolish the competiton.

Colton came home yesterday with glowing reports of glorious victories and total playground domination...

He says his buddy's all think I'm cool.

LOL....

Nobody but you Coon, could have written this "Samuel Clementish" illustration in the home-spun flavor, using the rules of English composition that reflect the fine education that you have. Great story. You are reinforcing the boys' masculine traits while teaching them responsibility that go along with it. You are a wise father.

Now, shall I tell of the many such wars that I've also had? Shall I tell of the sling shot (we didn't call them "sling-shots in those days) wars, the cow-patty (many uncured) wars and the fights that followed when we accused each other of knowingly throwing some that were uncured, the bedlum of uncured patties that followed? Shall I tell of the BB wars and the BB that is still embedded in my skin to this day? I had a single shot Red Ryder (because it was cheaper) while my oponents had Daisy guns. Though slighly disadvantaged in rapidity of fire, I was somewhat compensated in the superior force of that one shot. Everyone feared the power of that one BB.

Shall I tell all of that and much more? Naah? Everyone would wonder how it is that I am still alive with all of my functioning body parts. But, it would be interesting. Maybe I will leave all of that in my notes to my grandchildren and their children.

Again Coon, great story.