Well, I am *trying* my best to always be alert & aware! I, obviously, failed. I am praying for wisdom & guidance from the Lord.
I can remember feeling silly searching deodarant bottles and piggy banks, anywhere a kid could hide drugs. And then I heard about kids taking alcohol to school in their thermos. Half empty soft drink bottles that were used to hide the vodka or gin. They learn to hide it well.
And you didn't fail because he is alive.
__________________
If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.
2 Chronicles 7:14 KJV
He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God? Micah 6:8 KJV
Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is. 1 John 3:2 KJV
Don't be embarrassed! You are helping others by posting and you are getting help. imo
My son is only eleven but my dad sent me something recently about kids getting high on that dust buster stuff. They are inhaling it. I can see any kid or teenager doing something that stupid because no matter how much we tell them the danger, we aren't smart in their eyes.
Well, I am *trying* my best to always be alert & aware! I, obviously, failed. I am praying for wisdom & guidance from the Lord.
NO, you didn't fail, teenagers are brilliant when it comes to doing what they want to do. You would be failing if you were not responding to it once you did find out!!
Listen, I got off relatively easy with my daughter, and she had her moments. But I was a single mother with 1 child, not every parent has the luxury of being able to focus all of their attention on their child, and even in that situation, she pulled several stunts that could have been really bad if I hadn't reacted strongly.
She is almost 21, and she told me the other day that she is so thankful that I never trivialized things when she messed up, and that I always made her be accountable for her own actions. She is already able to see the benefit of that at her age.
You are paying attention, and you are being reactive and you are praying. There is no failure in any of that my sister!!
Sherri, I'm not disagreeing with you on this, I am sure that for you and others this has been the case, and I am sure that it was in large part because of diligent parenting.
And I by no means am trying to add to the load of Subdued by being a downer or pessimistic about this.
It is just that in my experience, and what I have experienced personally is very much a different story. I have seen many, many "church" kids get seriously derailed by drugs, and a significant portion of them are permanently scarred by it. And for the most part I would say it was the way the parents handled the situation that made a significant difference in the outcome.
Subdued sounds as though he/she? is handling this with the appropriate seriousness, and I will continue to pray for their family, this is a very hard thing for a parent to have go through.
How did the parents handle the situation that made a difference in the outcome? I guess what I am asking is what did they do that they could have done differently?
NO, you didn't fail, teenagers are brilliant when it comes to doing what they want to do. You would be failing if you were not responding to it once you did find out!!
Listen, I got off relatively easy with my daughter, and she had her moments. But I was a single mother with 1 child, not every parent has the luxury of being able to focus all of their attention on their child, and even in that situation, she pulled several stunts that could have been really bad if I hadn't reacted strongly.
She is almost 21, and she told me the other day that she is so thankful that I never trivialized things when she messed up, and that I always made her be accountable for her own actions. She is already able to see the benefit of that at her age.
You are paying attention, and you are being reactive and you are praying. There is no failure in any of that my sister!!
I agree! The devil would like nothing more than saints to beat themselves.
UGH - I know! Apparently, "robotripping" causes a person to feel affectionate. My son kept saying (while high), "Mom, give me a hug," to which I replied [at first], "I can't right now because I would not be hugging YOU, I'd be hugging a kid who's high & not in his right mind." Of course, I *DID* end up hugging him - and tight!!!!!
And yes, he was thinking about the next high -- until he thought he was dying. SO FAR, he is only feeling regret, fear and remorse. He's been confessing to many "sins," handing over his paraphernalia, and telling me where I can buy home drug testing kits.
I don't think it's only because he got caught. However, right now, I don't even know him! Nor do I trust him!
I lived this with a husband for 4 years, and I know first hand how angry it makes you when you know that you are not talking to a real person, but to a drug! Unfortunately, he let it become a choice, a way of life that he gave into and stopped fighting it, and he left who he originally was behind. I will tell you this, his problem started very young, and it was ignored and excused, and it took complete control of him.
How did the parents handle the situation that made a difference in the outcome? I guess what I am asking is what did they do that they could have done differently?
I just somewhat referred to this below, but in the situations that I have seen and been intimately involved in, the parents trivialized the situation, they blamed other people or events for what was going on, they didn't make the children accountable for their actions, and they didn't educate themselves and aggressively fight it.
It is much easier sometimes as a parent to bury your head in the sand and pray that it all works out, when you have other children, a mortgage, job and husband to worry about. I am not minimizing the pressure of those things, trust me, but I think if it kills us, our children are our primary responsibility, we have a sacred debt to do right by them. And sometimes that is HARD WORK!!
I'm not just talking out of the side of head here, I have been through drug rehab with a spouse twice, and I have had several seriously troubled kids live with me before, I have done my homework on this. Unfortunately.
My husband was in the military when my children were young. I remember we used to joke about the drug of the week that the physician would prescribe. Everyone was walking out with the same medicine that week. His favorite was Robitussin. Some on the parents of young children would give it to their children on a routine basis so they would be calm and stay out of the parents hair so to speak, or so they would sleep. I didn't realize that it was a problem with teens.
I think part of the problem with teens today is that they don't have the respect that past generations have. Respect meaning a healthy fear of adults. They think they will be fine nothing would hurt them. They have so many avenues telling them that parents don't know anything. My cousin had a good modeling career and was doing well (well in the eyes of the world he had everything going for him), yet he took every drug he could get his hands on. He thought he was invincible and nothing would hurt him. One morning his friends found him in his tent and he wouldn't wake up. They left him and got breakfast. When they came back they realized something was wrong he had oded on a combination of a drug and alcohol. He was only 19 years old. It was a new drug and very dangerous. I don't remember the name it was about 5 years ago now.
Subdued, I had to keep going back to the fact that we had dedicated our children to God when they were infants and that He loves them even more than I do. I kept speaking life and righteousness over them and tried to NOT speak anything negative that the devil could use as an accusation against them. My children are a heritage of the Lord! I kept professing that even if I didn't see it at the time.
Linear Mode
