This happened fairly recently...I went to the alter to pray, after awhile I feel a tugging on my shirt, and a "Sorry brother". It took me awhile to realize my pants was sitting a little low...
I have a car story myself. I was learning to drive, and after this event I felt fairly sick.
I was just learning to drive, and Mom had asked me to back the car out of the garage. I went out to the garage, got in the car, fastened the seat belt, and began to back out of the garage. I did not know anything was wrong until I noticed that the backward movement was a bit strange. Mom was fixing to head out the door to come to the car. She was at the door, looked out and noticed that the corner of the garage was moving.To this day we do not know how I buckled the belt without shutting the door, as part of the belt attached to the door. It was a good thing that we attended church with the lady we were renting the house from.
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I am an Apostolic Pentecostal. Apostolic in teaching, and Pentecostal in experience.
I have a car story myself. I was learning to drive, and after this event I felt fairly sick.
I was just learning to drive, and Mom had asked me to back the car out of the garage. I went out to the garage, got in the car, fastened the seat belt, and began to back out of the garage. I did not know anything was wrong until I noticed that the backward movement was a bit strange. Mom was fixing to head out the door to come to the car. She was at the door, looked out and noticed that the corner of the garage was moving.To this day we do not know how I buckled the belt without shutting the door, as part of the belt attached to the door. It was a good thing that we attended church with the lady we were renting the house from.
Now I know why instruction books are written the way they are. Like how to take a baby swing apart for storage: step 1, remove baby!
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Hebrews 13:23 Know ye that our brother Timothy is set at liberty
Now I know why instruction books are written the way they are. Like how to take a baby swing apart for storage: step 1, remove baby!
I'm sure you heard the one about the blonde dying of starvation in the shower? She was simply following the instructions, "Lather, rinse, repeat" on the shampoo bottle.
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1 John 4:8 He that loveth not knoweth not God; for God is love.
Now I know why instruction books are written the way they are. Like how to take a baby swing apart for storage: step 1, remove baby!
Sad but true. I would hope that I have increased in knowledge and wisdom, but I have said that I could play the part of an absent minded professor with ease.
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I am an Apostolic Pentecostal. Apostolic in teaching, and Pentecostal in experience.
bud light presents real men of genius
(real men of genius)
this memorial day we salute you mr. Gasoline bbq starter
(mr. Gasoline bbq starter)
never mind charcoal chimneys, and easy lighting briquettes. The only way to start a real bbq is with a gallon of 93 octane and a big book of matches
(light up the sky)
who needs eyebrows? You're hungry and you've got 7 pounds of lamb shanks ready to go
(that's a lot of kabobs)
you don't just defy convention, you defy warning labels, and common sense
(very low i.q.)
so crack open an ice cold bud light o' prince of the pyrotechnic, because no one makes a backyard mushroom cloud like you do
(mr. Gasoline bbq starter)
bawhaahahaw!
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It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man. (Psalms 118:8)
well, it's confession time to revisit this thread and spill some more stupidity....
Just went thru the car wash w my dirty black truck. Looking at the price options, I thought I'd splurge this once and bankcard the most expensive wash at $12. Went thru it fine, really cleaning well, till the dryers kicked on at the end, and kayos began. My son in the back seat said, "dad, there's trash blowing out!" But what's much worse is, I had spilt a bag of kinda pelletized chicken manure/fertilizer in the bed, and it got blown all over my truck. So I pulled out and the windows and whole truck covered with brown chicken poop. I rushed to the other care wash a block away, only to discover i had no quarters or cash, so I had to drive it home worse than it was before washing it....Covered with poop instead of dirt.
You still have me blown outa the water tho, Hoovie.
__________________ If you would win a man to your cause, first convince him that you are his sincere friend. Therein is a drop of honey that catches his heart...
Abraham Lincoln
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. - Eph. 4:29
that is for all then funny stories.
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