Lost: 10 Ways to Get Lost

[SDG]

Top Ten Ways to get Lost

10). Sit in the passenger seat of any vehicle and keep your mouth shut while your wife drives someplace she hasn't been before. —Doug Butt

9). Go on a five day backpacking trip through Arizona's primitive hiking trails in the middle of July and say, "TOPO MAPS?!!! I don't need no stinkingTOPO MAPS!" —Urban Bear R.F

8). Pretend to be blind. Take a dog that has no business guiding you. —Greg

7). Head off for a weekend of camping and paddling on that great river you remember from your youth. You don't need a map, its only been 20 years. —John Conover

6). Follow your "natural" sense of direction. —spencer

5). Trail tiny chunks of raw hamburger to follow back when done hiking (especially effective in bear country!). —Lyn L.

4). Use the "official" map issued by the Okefenokee National National Wildlife Refuge as you attempt to canoe through the Okefenokee Swamp. —Art Denney

3).Depend on moss to grow ONLY on the north side of trees in the Olympic National Park. —Molphi

2). Rely on your brand new GPS unit to get you in and out of the woods on a 5 day trip (but forget the owners manual and spare batteries at home). —deepwoods

1). Depend on markers five feet high when seven feet of snow has fallen. —Mike Paggioli

Just do it.

http://gorp.away.com/gorp/interact/topten/lost.htm

[SDG]

Feel free to add suggestions.

[DividedThigh]

how about listen to a preacher that is lost, lol,dt

[Neck]

Originally Posted by Daniel Alicea

Feel free to add suggestions.

Go into a 7'eleven in Birmingham talking like you are from Milwwaukee. Watch the store clerk look at you like you are from another planet.

Then try to pick on his hand motions as he tries to point you in the right direction....

[DividedThigh]

Originally Posted by Neckstadt

Go into a 7'eleven in Birmingham talking like you are from Milwwaukee. Watch the store clerk look at you like you are from another planet.

Then try to pick on his hand motions as he tries to point you in the right direction....

good one neck, now i dont have a prob, i speak southern , but you are so lost, lol,dt

[rgcraig]

Originally Posted by Neckstadt

Go into a 7'eleven in Birmingham talking like you are from Milwwaukee. Watch the store clerk look at you like you are from another planet.

Then try to pick on his hand motions as he tries to point you in the right direction....

What exactly does this mean?

[Neck]

Originally Posted by rgcraig

What exactly does this mean?

I meant to say try and pick up on his hand motions as he points you in the right direction.

I have been in Birmingham and I can't understand the words when they speak.

So you have to guess when they are pointing which way you should go!

[StillStanding]

As you're traveling on a long trip, look for a sign advertising a golf course. Get off at the next exit, pull into the gas station/store and let the clerk give you directions to the golf course. Follow said directions to the letter and you will be seriously lost!

[Timmy]

11. Watch TV.

[Nahum]

12. Pretend that you are a "newer" poster, when in fact you are just old hash posting under an assumed name, because no one thought you had any credibility under your old user ID.

13. Get buried under a mound of nothingness where posters ignore you for all of eternity because of your mean-spirited attacks on them.