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01-12-2008, 05:21 PM
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Supercalifragilisticexpiali...
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 19,197
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The Village idioT
OK, This is the place to share something stupid you have done.
This is a chance to laugh at yourself a bit - AND - allow others to join in!
ME FIRST
Well... we had this ice storm about a month ago... major ice!
The stuff was about 1/2" thick! All my cars are parked outside in the drive, and I was trying to figure the best method for removing the ice...
So, I get my rubber mallet...
Just thump the ice a couple times and it pops right off! I really got into it. In about 30 minutes I had cleared three vehicles.
So..... about a week later I started noticing what appeared to be hail damage on the minivan...
Closer inspection shows the hailstorm got ALL THREE VEHICLES!!
WHAT AN IDIOT!!! 
__________________
"It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity." Dave Barry 2005
I am a firm believer in the Old Paths
Articles on such subjects as "The New Birth," will be accepted, whether they teach that the new birth takes place before baptism in water and Spirit, or that the new birth consists of baptism of water and Spirit. - THE PENTECOSTAL HERALD Dec. 1945
"It is doubtful if any Trinitarian Pentecostals have ever professed to believe in three gods, and Oneness Pentecostals should not claim that they do." - Daniel Segraves
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01-12-2008, 05:23 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Dallas,Tx
Posts: 6,978
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephen Hoover
OK, This is the place to share something stupid you have done.
This is a chance to laugh at yourself a bit - AND - allow others to join in!
ME FIRST
Well... we had this ice storm about a month ago... major ice!
The stuff was about 1/2" thick! All my cars are parked outside in the drive, and I was trying to figure the best method for removing the ice...
So, I get my rubber mallet...
Just thump the ice a couple times and it pops right off! I really got into it. In about 30 minutes I had cleared three vehicles.
So..... about a week later I started noticing what appeared to be hail damage on the minivan...
Closer inspection shows the hailstorm got ALL THREE VEHICLES!!
WHAT AN IDIOT!!! |
Its not funny I know but................. 
almost as good as blowing up toilets!
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01-12-2008, 06:01 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,539
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AmazingGrace
Its not funny I know but.................
almost as good as blowing up toilets! |
One of the best ones I've seen!
I was preaching in MO. one time and this young lady got up to sing. She must have been a little nervous because instead of saying the usual thing she said, "Yall worship me as I sing." The place broke up in laughter!
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01-14-2008, 08:26 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 342
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev
One of the best ones I've seen!
I was preaching in MO. one time and this young lady got up to sing. She must have been a little nervous because instead of saying the usual thing she said, "Yall worship me as I sing." The place broke up in laughter!
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We had a man that played the sax (he played it very well). One time he got up and said "Worship me as I play". We all laughed also. It was quite funny.
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01-12-2008, 05:47 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,539
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephen Hoover
OK, This is the place to share something stupid you have done.
This is a chance to laugh at yourself a bit - AND - allow others to join in!
ME FIRST
Well... we had this ice storm about a month ago... major ice!
The stuff was about 1/2" thick! All my cars are parked outside in the drive, and I was trying to figure the best method for removing the ice...
So, I get my rubber mallet...
Just thump the ice a couple times and it pops right off! I really got into it. In about 30 minutes I had cleared three vehicles.
So..... about a week later I started noticing what appeared to be hail damage on the minivan...
Closer inspection shows the hailstorm got ALL THREE VEHICLES!!
WHAT AN IDIOT!!! |
Many years ago not long after I got into church the pastor had me lead most of the services. One night I was telling the church that I had heard about a lady that had a gourd growing around her neck, but that the Lord had healed her. Well I noticed that everyone was laughing so I asked what was funny? They informed me that it was called a goiter not a gourd. That was funny!
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01-12-2008, 05:48 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Dallas,Tx
Posts: 6,978
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev
Many years ago not long after I got into church the pastor had me lead most of the services. One night I was telling the church that I had heard about a lady that had a gourd growing around her neck, but that the Lord had healed her. Well I noticed that everyone was laughing so I asked what was funny? They informed me that it was called a goiter not a gourd. That was funny!
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01-12-2008, 05:53 PM
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Supercalifragilisticexpiali...
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 19,197
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rev
Many years ago not long after I got into church the pastor had me lead most of the services. One night I was telling the church that I had heard about a lady that had a gourd growing around her neck, but that the Lord had healed her. Well I noticed that everyone was laughing so I asked what was funny? They informed me that it was called a goiter not a gourd. That was funny!
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YOU IDIOT!!
__________________
"It is inhumane, in my opinion, to force people who have a genuine medical need for coffee to wait in line behind people who apparently view it as some kind of recreational activity." Dave Barry 2005
I am a firm believer in the Old Paths
Articles on such subjects as "The New Birth," will be accepted, whether they teach that the new birth takes place before baptism in water and Spirit, or that the new birth consists of baptism of water and Spirit. - THE PENTECOSTAL HERALD Dec. 1945
"It is doubtful if any Trinitarian Pentecostals have ever professed to believe in three gods, and Oneness Pentecostals should not claim that they do." - Daniel Segraves
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01-12-2008, 05:59 PM
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Rebel with a cause.
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Omaha, Nebraska
Posts: 6,813
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Stephen Hoover
OK, This is the place to share something stupid you have done.
This is a chance to laugh at yourself a bit - AND - allow others to join in!
ME FIRST
Well... we had this ice storm about a month ago... major ice!
The stuff was about 1/2" thick! All my cars are parked outside in the drive, and I was trying to figure the best method for removing the ice...
So, I get my rubber mallet...
Just thump the ice a couple times and it pops right off! I really got into it. In about 30 minutes I had cleared three vehicles.
So..... about a week later I started noticing what appeared to be hail damage on the minivan...
Closer inspection shows the hailstorm got ALL THREE VEHICLES!!
WHAT AN IDIOT!!! |
I have a fire pit behind my garage. Last spring, I was burning some brush and leaves, a very controlled fire. I looked around, and there was my CHristmas tree, I thought, "Good time to burn this!"
NOt realizing how combustible the tree was, I threw it right on the pit. Well, a fireball erupted, and melted all the vinyl siding on the back of my garage!!!!
My neighbor came out and was ooohing and aaaahing, on his way to town, I was quite embarassed, to say the least!
Anyway, my son and I found some extra siding in the garage, and had to replace all of the siding on the back of the garage!
THe neighbor came home a few hours later, and had to look twice, but we had fortunately fixed my mistake.
I learned my lesson about CHristmas trees!
__________________
"Many people view their relationship with God like a "color by number" picture. It's easier to let someone else define the boundaries, tell them which blanks to fill in, and what color to use than it is for them to take a blank canvas and seek inspiration from the Source in order to paint their own masterpiece"
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01-12-2008, 06:03 PM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 1,539
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Michael Phelps
I have a fire pit behind my garage. Last spring, I was burning some brush and leaves, a very controlled fire. I looked around, and there was my CHristmas tree, I thought, "Good time to burn this!"
NOt realizing how combustible the tree was, I threw it right on the pit. Well, a fireball erupted, and melted all the vinyl siding on the back of my garage!!!!
My neighbor came out and was ooohing and aaaahing, on his way to town, I was quite embarassed, to say the least!
Anyway, my son and I found some extra siding in the garage, and had to replace all of the siding on the back of the garage!
THe neighbor came home a few hours later, and had to look twice, but we had fortunately fixed my mistake.
I learned my lesson about CHristmas trees!
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That's a good one
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02-09-2012, 11:17 AM
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Registered Member
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: ohio
Posts: 614
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Re: The Village idioT
 that is for all then funny stories.
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