[rgcraig]

The Open Toed Shoe Pledge
>
> As a member of the Cute Girl Sisterhood, I pledge to follow the Rules
> when wearing sandals and other open-toe shoes:
>
> I promise to always wear sandals that fit. My toes will not hang over
> and touch the ground, nor will my heels spill over the backs. And the
> sides and tops of my feet will not pudge out between the straps.
>
> I will go polish-free or vow to keep the polish fresh, intact and
> chip-free. I will not cheat and just touch up my big toe.
>
> I will sand down any mounds of skin before they turn hard and yellow.
>
> I will shave the hairs off my big toe.
>
> I won't wear pantyhose even if my misinformed girlfriend, coworker,
> mother, sister tells me the toe seam really will stay under my toes if
> I tuck it there.
>
> If a strap breaks, I won't duct-tape, pin, glue or tuck it back into
> place hoping it will stay put. I will get my shoe fixed or toss it.
>
> I will not live in corn denial; rather I will lean on my good friend Dr.
> Scholl's if my feet need him.
>
> I will resist the urge to buy jelly shoes at Payless for the low, low
> price of $4.99 even if my feet are small enough to fit into the kids'
> sizes. This is out of concern for my safety, and the safety of others.
> No one can walk properly when standing in a pool of sweat and I would
> hate to take someone down with me as I fall and break my ankle.
>
> I will take my toe ring off toward the end of the day if my toes swell
> and begin to look like Vienna sausages.
>
> I will be brutally honest with my girlfriend/sister/coworker when she
> asks me if her feet are too ugly to wear sandals. Someone has to tell
> her that her toes are as long as my fingers and no sandal makes creepy
> feet look good.
>
> I will promise if I wear flip flops that I will ensure that they
> actually flip and flop, making the correct noise while walking and I
> will swear NOT to slide or drag my feet while wearing them.
>
> I will promise to go to my local nail salon at least once per season
> and have a real pedicure (they are about $35 and worth EVERY penny).
>
> I will promise to throw away any white/off-white sandals that show
> signs of wear... nothing is tackier than dirty white sandals.
>