Quote:
Originally Posted by Evang.Benincasa
All viable reasons but what Chris is saying is that you can divorce but never remarry as long as the other spouse is living. You can get remarried as per Chris' view if you cannot control yourself. But, you will be in sin, and have to do some sort of ecclesiastical penance of acknowledging that the union is sin. This is done through weeping, wailing, and gnashing of teeth.
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It's called confession and seeking mercy. When one confesses their sin and seeks mercy, forgiveness and blessing can flow.
I know a young lady who married a man who was divorced. Before their wedding she invited him out to eat to introduce him to all of us. He was a pleasant fellow. When she was talking to us (mainly my wife at the time), she said, "Yeah, he's divorced. But she cheated on him, so we're good."
That floored me. Because the exception clause only applies to husbands and wives who were in betrothal under Jewish tradition.
She would have been better off to say, "I know he's been married before. But we're in love. I can't imagine my life without him. I would have never imagined marrying a divorced man in a million years, until I met him. I pray that God have mercy on us." At least that would be real. And if sincere, I believe God is gracious and desires to forgive us. Such confession and brokenness over the human condition is healing and opens the doors for God's gracious mercy to flow and give beauty for ashes.
But... she went on her way, with her bun bobbing around high in the air, like she was happy his wife cheated on him so that, "they were good". He had the same perspective. All smiles, "she cheated on me's". No brokenness, no contrition, no soul searching for the sin they were about to commit. As a result... he never truly evaluated what it was in him that contributed to his divorce. While yes, she cheated on him (according to him of course), he never dug deep enough to realize that it was his own emotional aloofness that contributed to his wife's feeling starved for affection, leaving her open to the temptation of any man who would show her attention. Guess what... history repeated itself. This once bubbling couple who were all smiles about how "they were good" was ended with fighting, bitterness, and unfaithfulness.
It was really sad, because she was a young girl who had never been married before. Her own father had his reservations about her marrying a man who had been divorced. But, she was determined.
I believe that deep soul searching, confession of sin, desire to understand the previous sin of divorce and why it happened and how all parties contributed, and the determination not to ever divorce again could have gone a long way.
But, he was cheated on, so they thought "they were good".